ShrimpShady

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  ShrimpShady

• Today at 6:13 AM

Making commercials for an arms company has to be so awkward

Please buy our state-of-the-art self-guided human-incinerating murder bomb, with extra carcinogens and forever chemicals

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  ShrimpShady

• Today at 3:56 AM

Bam Adebayo of the Miami Heat scored 83 points last game against the Wizards, passing Kobe Bryant's 81 point game performance for 2nd all-time

I'm sick to my fucking stomach

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  ShrimpShady

• Yesterday at 11:22 PM

People like to say "opinions are like assholes, everybody has one"

But can we truly say for certain that everybody has an asshole?

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  ShrimpShady

• Yesterday at 1:00 PM

Daily music recommendation #355

I might not remember anything from the Bionicle movies, but damn if their soundtracks don't bang. So much early 2000s butt rock goodness.

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  ShrimpShady

• Yesterday at 11:20 AM

Back in my day if an anime had 11 or 22 episodes it was gonna be some pretty out there shit

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  ShrimpShady

• Yesterday at 6:20 AM

Some days I feel like putting on an anime girl profile picture, but that doesn't match the vibe I give off

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  Frestea

• Monday at 4:36 PM

Forget about sardines. Have some protein noodles.

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  ShrimpShady

• Monday at 1:45 PM

Daily music recommendation #354

To celebrate Bren Lukens of Modern Baseball fame doing a show after God knows how many years, here's a song sung by them.

This one's for all of my prospective girlkissers out there. It has such a uniquely somber vibe, quite different from MoBo's usual output

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  ShrimpShady

• Monday at 1:19 PM

Canned sardines are actually pretty good all things considered. I could eat them almost every day

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  ShrimpShady

• Sunday at 1:52 PM

Daily music recommendation #353

Happy International Women's Day. Women are pretty cool, I guess

This woman especially had crazy aura

But when you think about this, are they really vain when the song kinda is about them?

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  ShrimpShady

• Sunday at 1:20 PM

I think I should expand my apple palate. I don't even know what varieties I've tasted, but I've definitely had red delicious apples, and they are very red but not delicious. Like eating a 3D printed fruit. Disgusting

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  ShrimpShady

• Sunday at 9:11 AM

Listening to Marron 5's debut

Not bad

What the fuck happened to them

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  ShrimpShady

• Sunday at 2:22 AM

Why do people who claim to be unfiltered only use that unrestricted mouth to say harsh things?

What about unfiltered kindness?

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  ShrimpShady

• Saturday at 4:03 PM

I sentence you to life in a culturally rich third world tropical wonderland with an additional 25 years of being forced to watch as its people are priced out by tourists and investors

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  ShrimpShady

• Saturday at 2:08 PM

Daily music recommendation #352

Once again I don't remember if I've recommended this before. But I don't care, as this song is such a vibe. And also like, the only English-language ska punk song I know other than the ones off that Christian ska punk album.

Anyway, the bass line in this is so fun to play

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  ShrimpShady

• Saturday at 1:30 PM

I wonder if it's worth buying a cheap hand frother or if it'll blow up and atomize me

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  ShrimpShady

• Saturday at 12:27 PM

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  Frestea

• Saturday at 11:44 AM

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=948804181067145

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  ShrimpShady

• Saturday at 9:52 AM

imo shoes make or break an outfit. you instantly notice when someone's wearing goofy ass shoes, but unlike an ugly sweater of sorts, goofy shoes are harder to make charming

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  ShrimpShady

• Saturday at 7:22 AM

Coming from a very sober culture and upbringing, I can't imagine how some of y'all order cocktails

yeah i'll have a sex on the beach

let me get a pornstar martini

omg i love blow jobs