Would You Keep Reading?

[ESBarreto]

Ever wondered what it's like to live where your every move is tracked and scored?

10 chapters in. Dystopian surveillance city. LitRPG mechanics. Social credit nightmare.
Does Resonance Law keep you reading or put you to sleep?
Honest feedback wanted - the good, the bad, the ugly.

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/2070098/resonance-law/

 

[AliceMoonvale]

So, chinaland but worse, got it.

Sounds neat, I'd actually try reading it even though I find litrpg boring as shit.
If I do end up reading it, I might leave feedback.

 

[Leti]

In a world where your social credit score decides if you live or die,
Kai broke the rules to save someone.
The system should have punished him.
Instead, it boosted his score to 4.00.
Everyone congratulated him.
He knows better. It's a death sentence.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
NovaHelix doesn't just track you. It owns you.
Every breath. Every word. Every choice.
Your score determines who opens doors.
Who steps aside.
Who pulls you close or erases you quietly.
Then Kai's brother Paul vanishes.
No data. No trace. Just a paper note the system can't read.
Now Kai has a choice: stay Average and watch his brother
disappear forever, or dive into VY-4, the worst ring of the
city, where surveillance fails and the unregistered survive
in the shadows.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
A dystopian progression story about social scores, control,
and the moment you realize the system rewards the one thing
it's supposed to crush: humanity.
WHAT TO EXPECT:
✓ Weak to Strong (with brutal consequences)
✓ Dual POV: Kai (underground) + System Operator (surveillance tower)
✓ Underground resistance & found family
✓ Psychological progression with no easy wins
✓ Smart protagonist facing impossible choices
✓ No harem. No isekai. Pure dystopian grit.
Also on Royal Road
Reader reviews : "Like 1984 meets progression fantasy"
WARNING: Contains violence, systemic oppression, and characters making hard choices.

Overusing drugs and doing virgin cringe RR behaviour at the same time?

@Eldoria @Macha @Tempokai roast him.

Here is my feedback:

No harem. No isekai. Pure dystopian grit.
Also on Royal Road.

Why would anyone read your story here? You just give this site's audience a reason to avoid the story.

 

[Macha]

Let's assume English isn't your first language. Using the Butler to assist with translation is fine. Just don't let the Butler replace your voice with its efficiency because the results would be too literal and soulless due to being lobotomized for corporate writing.

 

[Eldoria]

What kind of feedback do you want? I checked SH and RR, your engagement isn't good. This might be a classic problem, story packaging.

First, your synopsis doesn't provide a hook. You explain the lore in the synopsis. System, dystopian world, humanity? Who cares?

Instead of explaining the worldbuilding... why not start the synopsis from the perspective of a human (protagonist) journey and make the reader care? Get used to starting an emotional connection with the reader first with a human conflict that resonates with the reader's life. The worldbuilding can be explained later.

Second, your fiction isn't well-adapted to the platform. You're using the RR pattern for SH, what are you expecting? Well, some SH readers might be allergic because they feel patronized or given subtle spoilers. It's best to just delete "what are you expecting" if it doesn't help and start a new synopsis that suits SH readers' preferences.

Third, your cover is clearly less marketable. Back-facing character covers seem mysterious, but in SH, it lacks appeal. SH cover preferences tend to be anime-style covers with elegant heroines without clickbait. If the MC is male, at least show his face.

Lastly, regarding the content, hmm... the formatting is quite good (mobile friendly). Honestly, I'm not a fan of the dystopia, progression, LitRPG genres, so I can't judge your content.

However, seeing a reader give a review in the prologue chapter column, I think... your content has appeal in its segment.

So, you need to improve your fiction packaging and update the content regularly. With consistent updates, your engagement might improve.

Critical Note:
My assessment may be biased. Why? It's normal for engagement to be poor when you've only released 10 chapters.

SH and RR readers (in my experience) will at least care about fiction with tens of chapters. Because new fiction with few chapters is often abandoned.

In the end, you probably know the problems with your fiction better than I do.

Good luck. Regards.

 

[Macha]

What kind of feedback do you want?

The kind that make you read the book, Nyaa.

 

[ESBarreto]

So, chinaland but worse, got it.

Sounds neat, I'd actually try reading it even though I find litrpg boring as shit.
If I do end up reading it, I might leave feedback.

Nice to hear it sounds interesting even if you usually don’t like LitRPG. If you ever try it, any feedback is super welcome. Thanks for taking a look !

Overusing drugs and doing virgin cringe RR behaviour at the same time?

@Eldoria @Macha @Tempokai roast him.

Here is my feedback:

Why would anyone read your story here? You just give this site's audience a reason to avoid the story.

Yeah, I see what you mean. That line makes it sound like I’m looking down on SH’s usual tastes instead of just describing the story. I’ve tweaked the synopsis to focus more on the character and less on that.

I’m still pretty new at this, so I honestly didn’t realize it could come across that way. I don’t look down on SH readers at all, and I appreciate the heads-up

Let's assume English isn't your first language. Using the Butler to assist with translation is fine. Just don't let the Butler replace your voice with its efficiency because the results would be too literal and soulless due to being lobotomized for corporate writing.

Yeah, that’s good advice. English isn’t my first language, so I do use tools sometimes, but I definitely don’t want to lose my own voice. I keep a closer eye on that and lean more into my natural style instead of letting it get too ‘corporate clean’ so the writing keeps as much impact as possible. Thanks for the tip !

What kind of feedback do you want? I checked SH and RR, your engagement isn't good. This might be a classic problem, story packaging.

First, your synopsis doesn't provide a hook. You explain the lore in the synopsis. System, dystopian world, humanity? Who cares?

Instead of explaining the worldbuilding... why not start the synopsis from the perspective of a human (protagonist) journey and make the reader care? Get used to starting an emotional connection with the reader first with a human conflict that resonates with the reader's life. The worldbuilding can be explained later.

Second, your fiction isn't well-adapted to the platform. You're using the RR pattern for SH, what are you expecting? Well, some SH readers might be allergic because they feel patronized or given subtle spoilers. It's best to just delete "what are you expecting" if it doesn't help and start a new synopsis that suits SH readers' preferences.

Third, your cover is clearly less marketable. Back-facing character covers seem mysterious, but in SH, it lacks appeal. SH cover preferences tend to be anime-style covers with elegant heroines without clickbait. If the MC is male, at least show his face.

Lastly, regarding the content, hmm... the formatting is quite good (mobile friendly). Honestly, I'm not a fan of the dystopia, progression, LitRPG genres, so I can't judge your content.

However, seeing a reader give a review in the prologue chapter column, I think... your content has appeal in its segment.

So, you need to improve your fiction packaging and update the content regularly. With consistent updates, your engagement might improve.

Critical Note:
My assessment may be biased. Why? It's normal for engagement to be poor when you've only released 10 chapters.

SH and RR readers (in my experience) will at least care about fiction with tens of chapters. Because new fiction with few chapters is often abandoned.

In the end, you probably know the problems with your fiction better than I do.

Good luck. Regards.

Thanks for pointing that out. I mentioned earlier that I’m new to SH/RR and didn’t really pay attention to platform differences at first.
I’ve now rewritten the SH synopsis to focus more on Kai and the human conflict.
For the cover, I know it’s not ideal for SH, and I’ll see how I can improve it to fit the site better without changing the core feel of the story.

 

[Notadate]

No, I only read object Mc and maybe monsters