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my two cents here: real sex, when you think about it, is kind of gross and messy and weird. it can be fun or poignant or angry or whatever mood - but it's still those first three things most of the time, too. sex that's too clean or logical tends to be very dry (pun intended) when read and is...

Gone back and forth about posting here - mostly because I'm not likely to make major revisions after 2+ years on multiple platforms and tend to feel that's unfair to people giving feedback - but I do find the roasts entertaining and insightful, and my curiosity is piqued. Especially since I...

I mean what you're mostly looking for here is usually inspired by irl fashion, so a good way to look into this would be studying a wide variety of fashion from different cultures, era, and movements as an art form.

You know how it feels being a writer? That's how it feels. Pretty much exactly the same lol You put in time and effort to improve, and then some people like it and other people don't and the most important part is that you like it, even if you can see where you have room for improvement. It's...

I misspelled the word While classically she is purely Jewish a lot of recent Christian/Catholic media has also begun to adopt her in a broader context, so many do see her as a "Biblical" figure in the modern era. (Though it is based on a misunderstanding.) OP states in their synopsis they are...

Okay, so, first big thing that takes me out of the story: the naming is too inconsistent in a way that does not make sense. Best example is chapter seven: We are going to the town of Waterbreak (English) on the island of Safo (which I assume is a play on "Sapphos", Greek) which is in the...

Chapter 3 feels dry because of the way Zeke thinks/talks. He feels very childish - I get you mean for him to be naive, but it's just a bit too far for him to come across as a naive young adult compared to like... a child. I even went back to chapter 1 because I couldn't figure out how old Zeke...

I can reconstruct the sound of people talking in my head so dialogue that I can't get a clear cadence or style from will take me right out of a story. Especially if I'm reading fanfic, because I can "hear" the character's exact voice in my head - so anything distinctly out of character, I can't...

Had some unexpected expenses this month and could use some extra funds, so as it says on the tin, I'm offering half off on my commissions for a limited time. I accept commissions through Ko-Fi, where you can find more examples of my work and all my prices. (Link contains artistic nudity.) I will...

Haven't read, but I can say, it's more intuitive for English readers if you just state: She deepened her voice to sound more intimidating as she said, "Stop that." -than to capitalize every letter. Sure, you can add a note at the beginning, but some readers will just choose not to read if...

I mean, seeing as a 13 year old could (and would) make this joke, I think you're fine.

I think some of it is just from a serialization standpoint - a lot of authors think they need to introduce everything for the story to be understandable, and once it's far enough in, it can be difficult to go back and be like "actually, this could wait until later" like you can with a...

Since I was going through the feedback channel and noticed I was giving the same advice a few times, I thought I would just make a post of my general advice for writing a synopsis. I wrote my current synopsis for DKG like two years ago and have being doing a bad by just copy-pasting it, so I'll...

Hi there! So, first, I don't think the prose intro for the synopsis is doing much for you. It's not giving us any information outside of the rest of the blurb, and it's not characterizing Ferric much, either. So I think you can start by dropping that. You need a stronger start - I think a good...

I don't need a review, just though the story sounded neat. So, first: your blurb is a bit wordy. I think you can make it a little more eye-catching with something like: I did just rearrange some things - your second line is a nearly perfect logline. It delivers everything I need to know before...

First thing that caught my eye was the synopsis, particularly the first line: The way you've used a comma here makes it seem like "a descendant of one of the last remaining Mythos clans" and "the daughter of the emperor who's responsible for the shrinking of the kingdoms" are the same person...

Thank you! ? Ha ha, I have played with changing my lineart colors in other works, like a cover I did for a different story, but I usually only use it when I'm looking for a particular effect. Usually something art neauvou - brown interior lines and thicker black exterior lines are more common...

My MC would try to fight the monster and wouldn't understand what's scary about them when they turn out to be so weak :blob_sweat: He wouldn't mock them or anything, he would just be genuinely perplexed.

Ha ha kind of why I like when you can mark specific chapters for mature/explicit content. Like, my story has open door explicit scenes... every 13+ chapters, for the most part (for the main plot, with a few extra for a side pairing that can be skipped for the main plot but are more about the...

I really do agree with the premise here that a lot of writing advice is worded in a way that's too vague and often misinterpreted, and that a lot of advice isn't actually helpful (everything is a rule until it isn't, etc). I personally hate when people overemphasize story structures, like the...