As Ingrid stepped into the portal she began to realize a few seconds in that she didn’t seem to be moving any farther despite her walking and feeling solid ground beneath her.
“My brain’s starting to hurt…” Ingrid found her voice warbly and distorted inside this rift. She felt her pupils wobbling as she beheld a kaleidoscope of colors she didn’t even know existed, moving in a way she didn’t even know was possible.
Now she felt as if she was falling but couldn’t even tell in what direction the plummet was taking her.
The world between worlds was both blindingly bright and completely dark. Simultaneously a white void devoid of all color and a jumble of colors, colors she could not describe despite her eyes taking in its image. She was seeing illusions her brain was randomly conjuring; the same way she would when immersed in the pitch-black for extended periods.
Ingrid blinked slowly as she turned and looked around. Her neck kept turning and turning but the view remained unchanged, her neck seemingly having no end to its flexibility.
Nothing was making sense.
“SIRIA’S RIGHT! IT’S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THIS!” Sammy whispered very quietly to everyone’s ears.
“Laggy connection again…” Cecil yelled calmly in panic. His portal was glitching as it turned to a blue screen displaying “No Signal”, which didn’t stop an ad for Farmer John’s Cheesy Jalapeno Chips from popping up at the lower-corner of his portal.
“QUICK! Change the channel!” Ralph wailed softly, adjusting his monocle.
Peanut was giggling as she danced over everyone’s heads, sprinking sugar everywhere.
“Have you tried the chicken, though?” Arthur squeaked. The mouse was T-posing as he hovered around, honey-fried chicken drumsticks rained from his paws while the ducks roosting on his shoulders were belting out a perfect rendition of ‘La Donna E Mobile” anyone on Earth would pay good money to hear, especially when one duck sounded exactly like Luciano Pavarotti and the other Mario Lanza.
Philia was furiously playing her accordion along to the tune, but it sounded like a trombone being waterboarded.
Ingrid caught one chicken drumstick that fell from Arthur’s paws, but all she saw in her hand was pineapple pizza.
“GET IT OFF ME! GET IT OFF ME!” The pizza pleaded “I DON’T KNOW ANYTHING! I’M JUST A MESSENGER!”
“Messenger my ass!” Ingrid said, shaking the pizza. The pineapples growled and barked like tiny chihuahua’s, tearing off bits of dough. Rivulets of molten marinara and mozzarella ran down the crust as the vicious pineapples continued to devour it alive.
“You’re one of them!” she accused.
“N-no!” The pizza protested, but the pineapples weren’t buying it, tearing off the pepperoni and making the pizza howl in torment.
On cue, giant shrimp a million feet long crested out of the periphery, creating a constantly moving arc of orange and white. On its colossal back rested every kind of sushi imaginable.
“We’re too late.” Siria sighed, “Naruto has summoned the dragon balls.”
Iohann looked up at the giant cresting shrimp and shrugged, returning to her desk to continue drawing her manga.
“That’s it, just keep it up.” The felmoon priest said. “Act natural.”
Kinu and Kvaris were making out on a bed.
“I’m the bottom again?” Kinu whined, but it was clear she was enjoying it.
“The fans prefer me.” Kvaris said, lowering herself for a french kiss.
“Mhmm… perfect.” Iohann said, drawing the scene. Her hand was frantically drawing page and after page of the two sisters enjoying a gangbang. Selphie’s eyebrows were furrowed in concentration as she tried to ink the lines, jumping as the phone loudly rang.
“Hello, Sheep Comics.” Selphie replied as she picked up the phone, her hands not stopping as she inked the orgy. “Miss President, it's for you.”
Iohann listened to the phone for a few seconds in annoyance.
“What!?” The felmoon priest bleated, and then her ears suddenly drooped in horror “...what do you mean the deadline is tomorrow!? Kinu and Kvaris don’t have their cosplay yet! We’re not gonna make it into Comiket on time!”
She banged her fist on the table, sending pens and ink flying everywhere. The pens screamed but some managed to deploy parachutes before the fall killed them.
The two sisters continued to make out in the background, unconcerned.
“Come on please!” The pizza pleaded, wriggling in Ingrid’s grasp. “I’m innocent!”
Peanut sprinkled some sugar on the pizza causing it to cough and retch.
“Tell the truth already!” The little mushroom giggled as she continued to tap dance over Ingrid’s head.
“Don’t lie to me!” Ingrid snapped. “That pineapple wasn’t on you by accident!”
“Boss, he might be telling the truth.” said a taco hovering beside her. As the taco flapped open and closed, salsa and guacamole drooled out of it.
Ingrid recoiled in disgust
“Dammit Sgt Taconi, have you been snorting guac again!?”
“Hey, you can’t kick a habit down for good.” The taco frowned, causing strips of asado to fall to the floor.
“We’re cops for God’s sake! And that guac was evidence!”
“Order in the court!” Sully said, shooting his gun in the air, a shower of cheese rained from his barrel which quieted the other mice having a heated debate regarding the merits of macadamia nuts versus almonds. The golden mice however were passed out, twitching on the ground. A hookah sent plumes of strawberry aroma into the air, laughing nefariously as it wiggled its stems in triumph. From the smoking bowl, buds of opium wearing shades were making their escape as they jumped out, crying in relief as they finally tasted the outside air.
“Hey…” Viel called, she was a crudely-animated 12fps paper cutout and all her colors had been inverted. “Wanna see my head come off?”
“Seriously, has anyone here tried the chicken though?” Arthur pressed, pelting the party with more honey-fried drumsticks as he T-posed over everyone.
Meanwhile, Autumnhollow, Terragalia:
“AUGH!!!”
Zefir and Gwen recoiled as a sharp blast of static pierced their headsets, quickly taking them off of their heads. The camera feed showed only dark, distorted pixels. A few seconds later they saw everyone was jettisoned out of the Rogue Rift and into an unfamiliar grassland, skidding a good thirty feet despite the damp grassy soil with a generous amount of rocks underfoot. Nobody stumbled however, the only inertia everyone felt was the few steps they took, as if they had just walked through a five-foot long corridor that separated the two dimensions.
“Wow, I literally just watched a real-life glitch.” Zefir said cryptically.
