I gained another negative rating on RR :(

PBJ_Time

It's Peanut Butter Jelly Time!
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Jun 7, 2023
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So, I checked out your book on RR. Read about 8 chapters. I thought the premise in the blurb had a lot of potential to be fun and intense, so I gave it a go.

Even though I'm not a really a fan of in medias res in books, I thought dropping into the action right away was cool, especially since the premise seemed to promise some hack-n-slash action. And even though AI art gets ripped a lot, I thought your selections were fine and added some nice flavor. The system seems cool, and I legit enjoyed looking at all the options Hajime could choose. Also, the steak contest was a first for me in fiction, so hats off for that. I prefer pizza, but still.

There are a few things I didn't like, but the big one for me is that I couldn't care about or get invested in the main character, despite his based Hawaiian shirt and jeans outfit. I mean, you tell us very little about this cat. I don't know if he's a saint or a psycho, if he volunteers to help one-legged orphans, or dips kittens in kerosene and lights them on fire for fun. Nothin'.

And what are his stakes? There appears to be no character dilemma or any kind of tension. Death isn't even an issue, at least up to where I read. The worst I saw was that the lumberjack had to go to the hospital for a while.

Also, I tuned in because I was expecting some young buck to be squaring off with slimes and gobbos, but most of this seems to be about Hajime screwing around with other characters that are even harder to care about.

Despite all that, I followed and favorited because I think this story's premise could make for a wild story with some TLC and more focus.

If you want my unsolicited advice - which most people don't - I say you should write an intense, meaty prologue about Hajime with the aim of introducing the character in a sympathetic way along with his personal and existential stakes. Then, you should ax 90 percent of the characters and focus on the horde survival element.

For example, Hajime goes in for a Beware the Horde delve and some freaky new enemy eats the shit out of his buddies. He manages to pull off a win anyway, but doesn't return to Dork City as normal. Then it goes on from there until he can figure out how to get back/find a new path forward because he got his isekai girlfriend preggers and doesn't want his child to grow up with out him, or some tripe like that.

Anyway, don't give up, stay based and keep writing.

And don't worry about ratings too much, they mean very little in a world with bots and assholes flying around in all directions. The TRUE metric for success is how many copies of your work you can hock on Amazon. I am acquainted with an established author with years of experience who makes enough money with his books to provide for his family, but even he doesn't get super great numbers, ratings or attention on RR (compared to the big RR dawgs).
Excellent analysis, fam. You're right about Hajime not feeling like a well-rounded character in the initial chapters, and that's because I wanted to flesh him out more on the second arc, which involves travelling into a different game world for an important mission. You see, I want my story to be long-running, and as a consequence based on other critiques I've gotten, the pacing got muddled along with some of the characterization. I'll try my best one day to revise these issues, but I'm still so busy with my backlog, it's insane.

Rest assured, though, I have almost everything mapped out with how my story will continue. It might change as soon as I edit them, but the themes of killing billions of foes in one large area will always remain intact (that is if it doesn't involve traveling-into-other-worlds shenanigans). I might write a prologue with some of the suggestions you talked about, too. It sounds interesting.
 

KingofPizza

Member
Joined
Oct 27, 2024
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Excellent analysis, fam. You're right about Hajime not feeling like a well-rounded character in the initial chapters, and that's because I wanted to flesh him out more on the second arc, which involves travelling into a different game world for an important mission. You see, I want my story to be long-running, and as a consequence based on other critiques I've gotten, the pacing got muddled along with some of the characterization. I'll try my best one day to revise these issues, but I'm still so busy with my backlog, it's insane.

Rest assured, though, I have almost everything mapped out with how my story will continue. It might change as soon as I edit them, but the themes of killing billions of foes in one large area will always remain intact (that is if it doesn't involve traveling-into-other-worlds shenanigans). I might write a prologue with some of the suggestions you talked about, too. It sounds interesting.
Yeah, I ain't tryin' to give you homework or something, but I think a nice prologue would make a world of difference. I know it did for mine - I held my cards too close to my chest, and it made my MC totally unrelatable. But after a good, emotionally intense prologue that showed my hand a little, it really made a big difference for the readers.
 
Joined
Nov 30, 2024
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IT JUST A LIVE IS JUST A LIE,
give you star, give him middle finger, whit Smail,
give you 2 star, make you linger, in denial,
give you 3 star, see the fire, burn awhile,
give you 4 star, raise your spire, reach the trial,
give you 5 star, dreams inspire, now just smile!
Yo Yo Yo:blob_shade::blob_sir:

work!.png
 

Keene

Squat Enjoyer and Programmer
Joined
Jan 2, 2022
Messages
181
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133
In RR, getting onto Rising Stars is infinitely more valuable by buying ads.

Rising Stars seems to favour posting novels frequently (about 1x or more a day). When I started posting Amelia Thornheart there, I had a backlog of about 25 chapters that would get uploaded almost daily. This got me halfway up the Rising Star list for, I think, two weeks or so. That time on RS got me over a thousand followers and formed the foundation to build from.

As an experiment, I bought some ads, but the click-through of 250k impressions got me fewer views than I did daily anyway. I think the hours spent earning money to buy ads would be better spent just... writing more.
 

beast_regards

Dumb-Ass Medal Holder
Joined
Jul 19, 2022
Messages
1,489
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The way I see it is that RR review swaps makes it so that new readers will know if your story is worth checking or not. Again, you don't have to do swaps every week, and I learned that. Here on SH, it's slightly less meaningful because it's not like you can buy ad space here to promote your story.

Anyway, I still read this book titled Auron Trinity when I have the time, a story I did a review swap with. I also continued reading another story called Beyond Infinity, but the author deleted it days ago.
The purpose of the review swap is to create the "false traffic" to boost the ad revenue.

Did you ever wonder why the site so obsessively protective about their blatantly unfair rating system allows and even advise on the review swap, despite it is very clearly transactional in nature?

The Royal Road is not interested in showing your story to anyone. Instead, they operate like social media, like Facebook or Twitter. Just like Facebook who would rather show you the post that would anger you rather than the message from your close ones, they want engagement, which would keep you scrolling, and raging, and clicking on ads, and review swap by design would anger a lot of people, create a lot of traffic, scrolling, staying on site longer than you need without really reading anything you want, and that's before the bots arrive forcing you to compensate the downvotes with other meaningless swaps.
 

JayMark

It's Not Easy Being Nobody, But Somebody Has To.
Joined
Jul 31, 2024
Messages
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The purpose of the review swap is to create the "false traffic" to boost the ad revenue.

Did you ever wonder why the site so obsessively protective about their blatantly unfair rating system allows and even advise on the review swap, despite it is very clearly transactional in nature?

The Royal Road is not interested in showing your story to anyone. Instead, they operate like social media, like Facebook or Twitter. Just like Facebook who would rather show you the post that would anger you rather than the message from your close ones, they want engagement, which would keep you scrolling, and raging, and clicking on ads, and review swap by design would anger a lot of people, create a lot of traffic, scrolling, staying on site longer than you need without really reading anything you want, and that's before the bots arrive forcing you to compensate the downvotes with other meaningless swaps.
raf,360x360,075,t,fafafa_ca443f4786.u1.jpg
 
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