They say time heals all wounds, but that's wrong. Time only heals some wounds. Other wounds get bigger as time goes by, and even more are created by the passage of time.
"This guy conquered one of the largest swathes of land in history, collapsing civilizations that lasted millennia while forming an empire that would last until his death 7 months later at age 19... while you, dear reader, are a failure who can't even fix a door hinge."
Last night, I dreamt that I was an operative for an invasive force, and I raided a military compound. Then, I defeated a swarm of robot assassins alone and bare handed. After that, I cucked Anon and stole his wife. Lastly, I went to a store called "The Duck Pond", and I bought a live duck and named him Mister Quackers.