What do you consider as harem?

[Fallen_Void]

This question has lately been bugging me... Exactly what is considered harem?

Like, I have two scenarios in my mind.

1. The MC is surrounded by multiple people who like them and even the MC at some level reciprocates their feelings.

2. The MC has no real feelings for the people in question and is just manipulating them into doing their bidding.

Harem is like a really fought on topic in my opinion, many people despise it and also a majority of people like it. So, my question was what do you consider as harem... 1 or 2, or both?

Personally I wouldn't consider number 2 as Harem. And also when the MC chooses/has their eyes on just one character whether many people love them, doesn't matter that isn't harem.

 

[RepresentingWrath]

1 is a harem. 2 is harem bait.

 

[Kenjona]

A "harem" is of at least 3 beings sharing a common interest (Romantic/Sexual/Advantage) to be with a protagonist. Does not matter what the MC interests are only that the 3+ beings have such an interest in them (Romantic/Sexual/Advantage).
Anything else is another trope added on to the "Harem" tag.

Imperial harem is a separate tag from harem. You can have both in a story, they are not exclusive to each other.

So a harem could be 3 beings who deeply love a dog; the squeaky toy he chews on that never seems to become broken, his master and her daughter. The dog she loves them all in kind.

Or the local wannabe idol, who has to fend off 3 stalkers (2 Lesbian 1 male), the boy next door and her female best friend. The 3 stalkers are in a three way tug of war of sabotaging each other, up to and including 2 joining to sabotage a third when that one gains a perceived advantage over the others.
The boy next door is the local King of the Jocks, who once dropped the ice cream on his ice cream cone, but the MC shared hers with him and he has been in love with her since. Though it will always be just platonic and he has been friend zoned so hard he is pretending to be in love with the best friend so he can still be by her side. The best friend knows the boy next door is in love with her love interest and so is stringing him along as her boyfriend, so he has no chance with said love interest. Best friend has been slowly grooming the Idol wannabe and has gotten far enough with said wannabe that she is always staying over for "cuddles".
Idol Wannabe though is in love with her Idol Trainer/manager <Surrogate dad type>, who is just in it for the money and really does not give a shit about anyone.

Ok, I went off the deep end on that last one, just could not stop typing the plot out.
Mind you most of us are interested in the first one. But the second one is also accurate.

 

[laccoff_mawning]

Both are harem. But I can't choose both in the poll, so I'll chose option 2 I guess.

 

[RainingFish]

There doesn't seem to be a hard definition for any of this, so I'll just give my opinion.

Harem: A mutually acknowledged relationship between one person and at least two other people at the same time.
Pseudo-harem: Multiple people liking one person at the same time.

 

[LesserCodex]

I asked a similar question on what we consider a small harem if you want to checkout the responses we mostly agreed 3 was the normal harem count.

What do you consider a small harem?

This is a simple question but one that demands extra thought if needed and it's simple what number do you consider a small harem? I believe anything between more than three is a small large harem, as there is no conventional standard for medium-sized harems, just a big or a small one. So how...

forum.scribblehub.com

 

[Xcalibur_Xc]

As long as its multiple people MC is sleeping with, loving, having segs. It's harem. Doesn't matter if feelings are involved or playing around. However, if there is only 1 on whom MC is focused on, it's not harem. In short. Multiple people=Harem.

 

[LiteraryWho]

Harem exclusively describes a situation where one character is the center of 3+ characters' attention (if there's only 2, then it's a love triangle, or possibly just a group of characters). Because of its Arabic root, it usually means one man and many women, though in general it's meant to be wish fulfillment for people who don't get enough attention in their lives. For clarity purposes, if the sexes are reverse, it would be called a reverse harem, and if the sexes are mixed, it probably would not be recognized as a harem, even though it would emotionally fulfill the same purpose.

How the MC feels about their entourage is largely irrelevant.

 

[ForgottenOne]

More than 3 female leads in the relationship with the main character I would consider a true harem.

 

[Thraben]

Both are wrong. harem is reciprocal BETWEEN ALL PARTICIPANTS. Multiple people who like MC, even reciprocated, are not a harem unless *ALL PARTICIPANTS agree that it is a harem.*

 

[Golden_Hyde]

I feel like I got a deja vu when it comes to this thread

 

[MaouRazonica]

Uknow, having been raised on anime. I actually thought for the longest time that harem just meant a bunch of people with a big crush on the MC, but no actual relationship.
Anyway. Harem is commonly understood to be one person (usually a man) in a relationship with many other people (usually all women). Not just infatuation. And those other people typically only have a relationship with that one person.
It has to be an actual relationship to my understanding. Sleeping around does not make a harem.

 

[CharlesEBrown]

The duplicating character from ARCSWAT
Cast – Grrl Power

 

[Golden_Hyde]

anyways, what Gebel said is somewhat true, but if I want to categorize the harems, there's fangirl harem (like KageJitsu), there's romantic harem (you know what I mean), and finally there's fuck buddy harem (aka a glorified gigolo fiction).

 

[Zagaroth]

As long as its multiple people MC is sleeping with, loving, having segs. It's harem. Doesn't matter if feelings are involved or playing around. However, if there is only 1 on whom MC is focused on, it's not harem. In short. Multiple people=Harem.

No, because harems have a central figure.

You can have 3+ people without it being Harem *if* all people involved are romantically involved with each other. This obviously requires bisexuality (or homosexuality if all are the same gender). It's called a polycule.

Using my own for an example: There are three main characters, and each pairing has its own romantic moments and sexual tension. The two women specifically have dates where the guy isn't involved, including spending most of book traveling with each other when circumstances dictate that he stay at the home base (and he's the one who insists that they go rather than waiting for him to be able to leave, which would take most of a year).

The duplicating character from ARCSWAT
Cast – Grrl Power

I love that series. :)

 

[StoneInky]

If you are asking which warrant the harem...TAG, I say both.

Yes, number 1 is more typical harem.

But if I found novel 2, and it wasn't marked as a multi person romance thing, I would be annoyed. It's like saying, 'it's not a proper marriage if one person is in it for transactional reasonsss!' No. It still is a marriage. Just a bad one.

 

[Pulpitt]

I'm not entirely defining harem as a matter of number. If multiple female characters fawn over single male character (or vice versa in reverse harem) for no reason other than author's interference, then it's a harem.

 

[Daitengu]

As an old anime fan, Harem is a wheel. One character is at the center(axle), and there's multiple other people (spokes) orbiting around them. In rom com the spokes are loose and chaotic(Love Hina), while in a power fantasy(Sword Art Online) the spokes and axle combine their powers to overcome everything and be one unit.

 

[Fallen_Void]

Uknow, having been raised on anime. I actually thought for the longest time that harem just meant a bunch of people with a big crush on the MC, but no actual relationship.
Anyway. Harem is commonly understood to be one person (usually a man) in a relationship with many other people (usually all women). Not just infatuation. And those other people typically only have a relationship with that one person.
It has to be an actual relationship to my understanding. Sleeping around does not make a harem.

Yeah, thats what I think too. Harem is only applicable when both parties are mutually in a relationship or have any sort of feeling for each other. Not just one side, it would be a crush at best. And it shouldn't be considered a harem!!

If you are asking which warrant the harem...TAG, I say both.

Yes, number 1 is more typical harem.

But if I found novel 2, and it wasn't marked as a multi person romance thing, I would be annoyed. It's like saying, 'it's not a proper marriage if one person is in it for transactional reasonsss!' No. It still is a marriage. Just a bad one.

I didn't mean like it like that... The characters are not married or anything in particular just The MC is playing with multiple people's feelings nothing else. I think harem should only be applicable when both parties have mutual at least minimal level of attraction.

Harem exclusively describes a situation where one character is the center of 3+ characters' attention (if there's only 2, then it's a love triangle, or possibly just a group of characters). Because of its Arabic root, it usually means one man and many women, though in general it's meant to be wish fulfillment for people who don't get enough attention in their lives. For clarity purposes, if the sexes are reverse, it would be called a reverse harem, and if the sexes are mixed, it probably would not be recognized as a harem, even though it would emotionally fulfill the same purpose.

How the MC feels about their entourage is largely irrelevant.

So if the MC is a highly attractive person and people generally fawn over them it's a harem? No, right? That's what I meant in number 2. The MC could be jerk and use their attractiveness, money or power to manipulate many people into having the fake sense of feeling aka love for them. I wouldn't consider that harem, in my opinion...

 

[Tsuru]

This question has lately been bugging me... Exactly what is considered harem?

Like, I have two scenarios in my mind.

1. The MC is surrounded by multiple people who like them and even the MC at some level reciprocates their feelings.

2. The MC has no real feelings for the people in question and is just manipulating them into doing their bidding.

Harem is like a really fought on topic in my opinion, many people despise it and also a majority of people like it. So, my question was what do you consider as harem... 1 or 2, or both?

Personally I wouldn't consider number 2 as Harem. And also when the MC chooses/has their eyes on just one character whether many people love them, doesn't matter that isn't harem.

TO EVERYONE
that need clarification

1) Pokemon Ashketchum but harem (ending)
>Keep the girls (not leaving group), but is VERY dense, and only after 300episodes slowly develop feelings (and ending of huge marriage)

2) Death Note Kira + the girls (used evilly by him)
>He keeps Misa, incest sister, get the police wife, get the news girl. Potentially or not have sex. But have no feelings for them, and use them at very end to escape the police, and mocking for their stupidity after he survives with a evil smile. Ending of Kira winning.


so yes. CLEARLY its (1)
because picking (2) is as dumb as telling that a "jp harem anime" is harem because lot of girls crush on protag, but protag dont reciprocate and marry 1 girl at end. Yes it isnt harem. Worse is that some animes with 2 girls fighting over protag, is considered harem when truth : love triangle.


ps : For more visibility OP, you can/could edit my 2 analogies into your post.