The Pressure Of Marriage.

[HungrySheep]

I honestly don't understand the emotional reasons of marriage.

The vows are cute, but that's about it I think.

 

[Dark_Phoenix_Zaetyk]

The vows are cute, but that's about it I think.

And those vows are easily broken even in span of weeks or months.

 

[HungrySheep]

And those vows are easily broken even in span of weeks or months.

Those people shouldn't get married. I don't understand people who spend all this effort to commit to what is supposed to be a LIFELONG relationship forged with TRUST and LOVE while dropping FAT STACKS on the ceremony and then a couple weeks/months/years later end up fucking destroying what they built over the dumbest shit. Arguments? You're adults, fucking talk to each other and communicate. It's not that hard. Problems? SHARE THEM with each other, you're MARRIED. Cheating? You're a terrible person and shouldn't have committed to the relationship in the first place.

I could go on, but I feel like it'll just be a rant at this point LMAO

 

[Llamadragon]

Why should I? I'm not interested in having kids, and I can be in a loving relationship without getting married. My parents still aren't married, but I was born anyway, and they're still living together. I understand there are some legal incentives to get married, and that some people love the idea of showing their commitment to each other and to others, in which case, all the power to them.

But at the same time, both sexes have plenty of legal incentives to not get married. Especially now that some places are pushing to remove the ability to freely divorce. All I'm going to say on that topic is that all the men who went to buy some smokes and never returned probably didn't go get smokes. Who won in those scenarios? The woman who felt so trapped by her circumstances that she resorted to murder? The man who got murdered? Really, who won?

Yeah that's an extreme scenario but laws change. Many equality laws have recently been removed in the USA and other countries are being affected by the right-wring movement. Everybody is going to have to pay for the loss of those laws, and fewer people will get married because what if the government tries to control your life by controlling marriage and divorce laws? Why put myself in the path of the bear traps jaws? Marriage is a wonderful thing for functional couples. But you never know in advance what happens in life. You can never truly guarantee that you'll remain a functional couple. For all you know, your wonderful partner might get brain damage from a car accident or from a tick-borne disease or something and turn abusive against their original nature, but there you'll be anyway, having to go through a legal mire to separate your assets and your economy so you can get to safety and protect your kids. Or this could happen to you, and the person you love would have to go through that.

At the end of the day, marriage is equivalent to giving the other power over you and your life. This is a good thing - for as long as everybody acts with with the others best intention in mind. If that ever stops being the case, marriage is a horrible legal trap, sometimes a death trap.

Meanwhile, I could have most of the same things - the commitment, the love, the family, the shared economy, even the ritual in front of whatever gods I/we'd choose to swear my/our oaths to - without the legally binding piece of paper.

 

[KoyukiMegumi]

Well, I'm married and have no kids because I just can't afford them. My two children are my fur babies, and let me tell you, marriage is about commitment and sacrifice. However, you get a life partner with whom you do everything together. He's my rock, and I'm his. We've been through hell together, and that made us stronger. I'd trust him with everything, which is why I married him.

Marriage was a way for us to unite assets and pay for our medical insurance. It also gave him all the medical decisions when I couldn't make them, and that's why I married him. I trust him and his duo in life. You don't need to have kids to have a life partner with whom you want to spend your life. You just need to understand that it comes at a cost, and it's no longer you but we.

Most people don't understand this, so marriages fail right and left. We've been together for 14 years, so we've been doing something right! We Married for one, but we were basically already married since year one since we've lived together since then. I don't do anything without him, and he doesn't either.

Good luck, friend. May you find your one eventually. It's sad to die alone. That's all I can say as a nurse and everything I've seen.

 

[MatchaChocolate69]

Marriage is something that shouldn’t be forced; it happens naturally when you find the right person and after you've lived together long enough to learn their flaws and accept them. Its importance lies in the fact that it provides a form of protection for the relationship, enabling actions that aren't possible in an unofficial relationship, such as in cases of health issues. It's also easier to get mortgages or loans together and to move forward with shared projects. Of course, it also provides protection for potential children.

The ceremony is a socially important event as it announces the official nature of the relationship to family and friends, allows the couple to gather money and gifts to build their future together, and reaffirms in front of everyone the person they intend to spend the rest of their life with, taking on a serious responsibility.

I believe that in the past, people got married younger and more casually because it was seen as an expected part of life, and there was societal pressure. Nowadays, it’s a carefully considered decision made when people have reached a certain level of maturity, as it’s a responsibility that requires true adults to bear. Frankly, I see less of that in millennials and Gen Z. Not that previous generations were necessarily better, but they were definitely mentally stronger, less self-centered, and less frivolous.

 

[Kalliel]

From what I've seen, financial stress is the primary reason for not getting married. In addition to that, perhaps the exposure to all the worst dating cases on the internet has contributed some, too. I could go on about how the dating market has changed, and young men's mental issues have become more prevalent and whatnot, but I'll leave that to your research.

 

[Dark_Phoenix_Zaetyk]

Marriage is something that shouldn’t be forced; it happens naturally when you find the right person and after you've lived together long enough to learn their flaws and accept them. Its importance lies in the fact that it provides a form of protection for the relationship, enabling actions that aren't possible in an unofficial relationship, such as in cases of health issues. It's also easier to get mortgages or loans together and to move forward with shared projects. Of course, it also provides protection for potential children.

The ceremony is a socially important event as it announces the official nature of the relationship to family and friends, allows the couple to gather money and gifts to build their future together, and reaffirms in front of everyone the person they intend to spend the rest of their life with, taking on a serious responsibility.

I believe that in the past, people got married younger and more casually because it was seen as an expected part of life, and there was societal pressure. Nowadays, it’s a carefully considered decision made when people have reached a certain level of maturity, as it’s a responsibility that requires true adults to bear. Frankly, I see less of that in millennials and Gen Z. Not that previous generations were necessarily better, but they were definitely mentally stronger, less self-centered, and less frivolous.

Nowadays you have to consider alot of things when it comes to marriage.... it's stressful.

From what I've seen, financial stress is the primary reason for not getting married. In addition to that, perhaps the exposure to all the worst dating cases on the internet has contributed some, too. I could go on about how the dating market has changed, and young men's mental issues have become more prevalent and whatnot, but I'll leave that to your research.

Yeah financial is one of the biggest obstacle...why bring children or your partner when you can't take care of them.

Well, I'm married and have no kids because I just can't afford them. My two children are my fur babies, and let me tell you, marriage is about commitment and sacrifice. However, you get a life partner with whom you do everything together. He's my rock, and I'm his. We've been through hell together, and that made us stronger. I'd trust him with everything, which is why I married him.

Marriage was a way for us to unite assets and pay for our medical insurance. It also gave him all the medical decisions when I couldn't make them, and that's why I married him. I trust him and his duo in life. You don't need to have kids to have a life partner with whom you want to spend your life. You just need to understand that it comes at a cost, and it's no longer you but we.

Most people don't understand this, so marriages fail right and left. We've been together for 14 years, so we've been doing something right! We Married for one, but we were basically already married since year one since we've lived together since then. I don't do anything without him, and he doesn't either.

Good luck, friend. May you find your one eventually. It's sad to die alone. That's all I can say as a nurse and everything I've seen.

Wow i'm touched....funny thing my parent never had marriage ceremony or anything they just started living together which we call "come we stay" lol...in country people really don't think much about marriage you just start your life with your partner if you love each other.

 

[Awazawa]

What are the reasons most later millennials and Gen Z are not getting married at all?,i'm 27 but the word marriage is a distance nightmare to me.I don't even visit home because i get attacked with the marriage scheme everywhere.....if my mom wants grandkids that's my two siblings work now, it's sad but a pretty normal thing for me.

What are the reasons most later millennials and Gen Z are not getting married at all?,i'm 27 but the word marriage is a distance nightmare to me.I don't even visit home because i get attacked with the marriage scheme everywhere.....if my mom wants grandkids that's my two siblings work now, it's sad but a pretty normal thing for me.

I’d say a big reason is the legal and cultural shift away from traditional marriage standards.

Before - marriage meant commitment, til death do us part, saving your virginity until marriage, monogamous, family, growing old together, having children, supporting one another.

Now - getting divorced and remarried is not unusual, courts side with the ex-wife in most cases, hook up culture and promiscuity is not frowned upon, open relationships after marriage, lots of feminists put off guys since that’s like declaring off the bat you hate men and blame men for most of life’s problems, LBGTQ+ agenda most guys don’t want to date liberal women because they are afraid she’ll go crazy and trans their kids at 2/3 years old. Most women don’t even consider regular looking guys as dating partners unless they are loaded and even then would probably drop them for a better looking rich guy in a heartbeat (we’ve all seen the videos of women acting like gold diggers when a guy pretends to be poor and then has a Lambo turn up). The culture is rotten, and to be honest it is no wonder that so many women sleep around and act like sluts when all the movies, magazines, music is constantly brainwashing them into thinking that Prince perfect who looks like a model is right around the corner to pick them up in his million dollar car to go to his million dollar mansion, and then will spend fortunes on her and then at the end of it all, she got bored anyway. So screw him and while she’s at it get half of his worldly possessions and take away his kids. Then because we must always believe all women including the ones that might lie, she then claims he was violent towards her I’m sure everyone is familiar with the Amber heard/ Johnny Depp trial and how the truth of that little claim came to light. Before, divorce was shameful, adultery was shameful, abuse was shameful. Now nobody holds these parasitic women to account same as they don’t hold the toxic men (the players) to account.

moral of the story, get out of countries with crap morals, laws and values, find a traditional woman and have a traditional family through the traditional meaning of a marriage. Leave the women that have no concept of loyalty and devotion to get played by the players and enjoy your life.

 

[HelloHound]

Part of the reason is that it's so easy to get screwed over by the tedious and detailed process that marriage is. If you don't have financial freedom or are isolated or haven't a strong backbone then not only can you get hurt, you might have ruined your life if you choose the wrong partner.

I'm not opposed to the idea of marriage but there's not a lot to incentivize that to the average person; sure there's always love or something but the rugs always there to get pulled really quick.

Spoiler: small list of worries

What if your partner refuses to have sex with you for the majority of your marriage? What if your partner cheats? What if your in laws are insane and your partner always takes their side in arguments? What if they start to spend any money you have in the joint bank account? What if they quit their job to be a terrible youtuber or streamer? What if they leave the children solely as your responsibility but also expects chores to be done in addition to having another income to support the household? What if they are abusive and refuses to let you leave them?

There's just not a lot going on in favor of a lifelong legal shackle rn.

Not to mention in the USA if you are disabled and get married then you might not be able to have access to the pittance of funds the government sends to you

 

[Alski]

I support idiocracy.

​

 

[KoyukiMegumi]

Wow i'm touched....funny thing my parent never had marriage ceremony or anything they just started living together which we call "come we stay" lol...in country people really don't think much about marriage you just start your life with your partner if you love each other.

Heheh, that's how my hubs and I started. One day, I slept over at his home and stayed. We clicked and never went back after that.

Marriage ceremonies aren't needed, in my opinion. My wedding was rushed, and my sole purpose was to give my hubs medical insurance for his current needs. My little gathering consisted of my grandmother, aunt, mom, dad, uncle, and his wife(who currently has dementia, and it was really nice of him to bring her there), who surprised me by being there. We wasted, I think, $150$ on the process of getting married. (Where I live, they force us to do laboratory work to ensure we are healthy before marrying. To ensure the other party knows if they have std or not? I'm not sure why they do that.)

I don't regret not having that big wedding dress and ceremony. c: That little chill one was all I needed, plus the surprises I got from my uncle being there. I honestly just thought it would be the priest and my hubs at my grandma's house, but it ended up being a pretty memory.

All that matters is who you want to spend your life with. I believe everyone should have that because it's a beautiful thing to have someone with whom to do everything. I learned that from my grandparents, who were together for 75 years. It's what I strive for in my relationship—in it until we croak!

 

[JayMark]

Those people shouldn't get married. I don't understand people who spend all this effort to commit to what is supposed to be a LIFELONG relationship forged with TRUST and LOVE while dropping FAT STACKS on the ceremony and then a couple weeks/months/years later end up fucking destroying what they built over the dumbest shit. Arguments? You're adults, fucking talk to each other and communicate. It's not that hard. Problems? SHARE THEM with each other, you're MARRIED. Cheating? You're a terrible person and shouldn't have committed to the relationship in the first place.

I could go on, but I feel like it'll just be a rant at this point LMAO

 

[RepresentingDesire]

Lol i expected this from you.... seriously i am not surprised by your answer.

I simply see no need for symbols, if I archive commitment to someone there's no need for something like symbols, no that they can save a marriage.
Btw homosexuell marriages have a higher success rate. This is so because it's harder/rarer to find someone of the same gender that will love you back, I think that was the reason.
Ps for the traditionalist, a long lasting and child bearing marriage doesn't equal a happy marriage, the Christian woman kink is needed for a healthy atomic family.

 

[GlassRose]

I mean just cause you're married doesn't mean you have to have kids. Marriage because girlfriend is pretty and nice and fun and you want to be with her forever!

 

[Representing_Tromba]

Currently trying to get engaged to my girlfriend at the moment and a lot of the issues involve the economy being so bad that very few people can financially have children or even share a home as many people are staying with their parents till 30 due to housing costs. Traditional weddings cost a small fortune and untraditional weddings still cost a pretty penny depending on what you define that as. There's also the sad state of the dating scene where people consider either themselves or other people to be completely undatable/unmarriable for various reasons. Other people can't date, let alone marry, because they are so busy working that they don't have the time or energy to put into a relationship. Marriage is also seen by a lot of men as evil due to how the court system leans toward the wife's side during divorce and would rather not risk it. These are just a few things that I have noticed.

 

[QuercusMalus]

What are the reasons most later millennials and Gen Z are not getting married at all?,i'm 27 but the word marriage is a distance nightmare to me.I don't even visit home because i get attacked with the marriage scheme everywhere.....if my mom wants grandkids that's my two siblings work now, it's sad but a pretty normal thing for me.

Ah yes, Grandbabyrabies is a definite thing. Luckily my sister took care of that itch for the parentals... I am a little sad that my Grandfather didn't get to see either of his great grandchildren. My sisters due to covid limitations on international travel, and my cousins coming 4 months too late. :(

But reasons- firstly, $$$. Jobs aren't paying what most people need to be comfortable and feel secure enough for a big step like marriage. Secondly, time. Given the first bit, you have many with second or third jobs and assorted side hustles. Doesn't leave much time to meet someone, let alone start a solid relationship.

Wedding costs are insane. We did a justice of the peace ceremony and then rented a pavilion in a state park and did a BBQ. Total cost, under $1k. Added benefit of no alcohol involved so I didn't have to worry about my side of the family too much.....

 

[Sola-sama]

Hahah, I got two jobs, a full time one and a freelance.
The full time one already drained me on my weekdays, and the freelance one drained me of my weekends.

If I don't take these two jobs, I can't survive because living isn't even enjoyable but it's fucking expensive.
Do I want to get married? The answer is yes. I want someone to take care of me, and I would love to take care of someone.
The problem is stuff are bery expensive, be it on financial or temporal.

 

[DeepWater]

One word
Women

 

[ThrillingHuman]

If you have a significant other, you would want them to have legal grounds to get your inheritance in case of an unfortunate accident, for example.
If you have children and are male, you'd want the kids to have some legal grounds too, and if you're female you'd want to protect them legally.
All comes down to property.