The Insincere Post Ironic Unhelpful Feedback Thread

[harrydouthwaite]

Here is a little story I've been working on for almost a year. So far I've polished as far as the eighth chapter, but anything would be appreciated, as I haven't had much feedback at all.

Feelings and Fondness

 

[Caylvanyth]

I am also same as harry but I been working on this novel ever since 2006/Primary School/Grade School

I have my drafts in a google drive folder for now. Will eventually have more to edit later on.
https://www.scribblehub.com/series/974493/gliese-memories-of-earth/

 

[nii07]

I'd love some feedback on my little story

My Goddess Mother Gave Me A SYSTEM AND KICKED ME OUT

A disembodied soul wakes in a void with no memory of who they used to be but still has a general knowledge of how they had lived on Earth. The soul is approached by a primordial goddess of chaos and is asked by the goddess whether they wish to join...

www.scribblehub.com

 

[WhiteRose-BlueSpace]

You know what? Go at me, I've got my first attempt at a fantasy series right here and the early chapters could be improved on but I am too busy to go back to them. It starts slow and uh- doesn't get stabby till chapter 10 but anyway!

 

[CarburetorThompson]

Here is a little story I've been working on for almost a year. So far I've polished as far as the eighth chapter, but anything would be appreciated, as I haven't had much feedback at all.

Feelings and Fondness

Better late than never I guess.

Descriptions are good. Good word choice. Varied sentence lengths. The actual writing is pretty solid imo but the first chapter lacks any real hook. You're gonna lose most readers at the first paragraph so it's important to give them a reason to keep reading.

Synopsis is too long. I recommend going to myanimelist and looking at some synopsisi written there. Particularly anything that says [mal rewrite] those are all good and community curated.

Lastly the biggest problem with the story, something that will be hard to get past. There's too many British people.

 

[Nevafrost]

The Truth is Mysterious

The four princesses are trying to solve a mystery together. The path won't be an easy one and they will have to confront so many obstacles. While trying to unravel the mystery, they will meet their destinied partners and some untold truths. However, they will unravel the truth behind all...

www.scribblehub.com

Would appreciate much

 

[H0LL0W]

I'm writing a story for the RR Write-a-thon and decided to post it on here as well.

Please leave a review on my story. :) I have been told that I am good at characterization and that I have style but that I need to improve in descriptions. What else could I improve on?
The Weavers of Fate