Writing Synopsis

[GhostlyArtz]

(Overall help) How does one write an interesting synopsis for multiple characters? Any and all advise is appreciated

And then for specific help: Hello, so I've been struggling with my synopsis since the beginning of time. And I kind of made it difficult for myself to begin with since my story is about several different characters with very different story threads and then an over arching plot to tie it all together. And I'm not sure how to go about with getting a synopsis that conveys part of it, or all of it? I'm not the best at explaining things without spoiling so...

Spoiler: Story info

So over arching plot is about a civil war. A very slow build civil war that's broken up in the span of a trilogy. Beginning, middle end.
But then for characters you got: Malakai- kidnapped by a serial killer and he's going to try to escape; Felix- working on a civil rights movement; Odaix- learning the horrors of her reality and trying to convert an... 'evil' person into 'good'; Pete- Trying to get rid of magic; Zamron- trying to enact revenge on the people that killed his daughter
(And they all have an effect on the way the over arching plot goes)

Spoiler: Synopsis attempts

Thirteen years ago there was a massacre. A witch hunt of the worst kind with the ashes of innocents falling from the sky.

Now the world is made up of fragile glass, the cracks sharp and jagged. Something that cuts easily and deep, blood dripping from its shards.

The world waits in baited breathe, hatred curling deep in the crimson sea boiling right beneath the surface. All it takes is one wrong move and then everything shatters and the world is flooded with blood.

It starts with the girl with the bleeding hair in the middle of the monster filled mountains.

It starts when Ann takes a life that was never hers to take.

It starts with Felix asking a boy if he wants to change the world.

It starts when Mihr falls apart.

It starts with a bloody smile and an apology.

It ends when every shard drowns and nothing remains of what they once knew.

(Basically trying to name drop or reference most of the important characters with vague mentions of actual story events, but I was told it has no clarity on the actual events of the story)
----------------------------------------------------
Felix stares at the boy curled in a ball in a broken alleyway. "I have an offer."

The boy looks up, amber eyes watching as he prepares himself to bolt from the supposed threat. Felix can't help the smile that crawls across his face as he entreats,

"It's nothing bad. Promise. It's just, I'm tired of hiding. I'm tired of watching people die over stupid things. I'm tired of being afraid. Surely you understand?"

"I'm not-"

Felix shushes the cowering child, "You don't need to be a nephlim to want to make the world better for them. That's the bright side of being human, you can be selfless if you want to be. You can make life better for others and not worry about not being included. Do you want to?"

The boy furrows his brows as he asks, "Want to what?"

"Change the world."

This is a story about how it can take the smallest things to start an avalanche. This is how a world made of glass shatters and everyone finds themselves freefalling into the abyss.

This is how everything begins and how everything ends.
(The current one I am going with, but- it has a heavy reference on Felix so I think it would lead people to believe that the story is Felix centric when it is not. Or, it might not set things properly?)
-------------------------------------------------------------
Sixteen years ago a disease decimated the population. It was said to be a gift from the godling of witchcraft herself, and that those unable to use her gift were doomed to die.

Thirteen years ago there was a war between those who were blessed by Anate and those who were cursed.

That war ended with a witch hunt, the ashes of the innocents falling from the sky. Now, nephlims have to be careful. They have to be wary on what they do, who they interact with, and the possible consequences of any negative action. This is a story about how it all changes.

This is how the very beginning of life starts changing and corrupting around its inhabitants. This is how everything beneath their feet shatters and they are left to fall into the abyss.

This is a story about the second war between nephlims and humans.

This is a story on how everything ends.
(This is another one I scribbled down as a possibility)

But, any advice or help would be greatly appreciated!

 

[Moctemma]

The first one is the best imo, except for this part

It starts when Mihr falls apart.

It starts with a bloody smile and an apology.

It ends when every shard drowns and nothing remains of what they once knew.

The second one was boring to me.
And the last was too general and lacked mystery. It tells me a war happened and ended and I'll read the same happen again.

 

[DubstheDuke]

I mean, I just sorta did a list that describes my 4 main characters personalities and traits.
Whether that's good or not, eh. But it gets my point across.

 

[SwirlyUnicorn]

I mean, I just sorta did a list that describes my 4 main characters personalities and traits.
Whether that's good or not, eh. But it gets my point across.

Besides from that you could also tell them what will be their roles to the plot progression (just a glimpse)

 

[GhostlyArtz]

I mean, I just sorta did a list that describes my 4 main characters personalities and traits.
Whether that's good or not, eh. But it gets my point across.

Besides from that you could also tell them what will be their roles to the plot progression (just a glimpse)

Hmm, like maybe:
"Felix has been working on his plan for years going the nice gentle route that Rizeal wants. It hasn't worked, hybrid nephlims are still illegal and nephlims are still being killed for petty crimes so, he's going to change their tactics to something a bit more threatening. If the CME won't listen to peace, they'll listen to violence.

Malakai has been hunting a nephlim serial killer for the past four months and then things take a turn for the worst in the tiny town of Demsen. They're so close, he can taste victory. Unfortunately, the sweet taste of victory does not last long as he gets lost in the Qleehl mountains. In fact, it takes a distinct sour taste when the serial killer he was hunting finds him instead.

Odaix just got out of officer training for the CME and her mentor is the infamous Death. An off-putting nickname that she soon learns he rightfully earned because- all of the things she learned about the experimental nephlim prison? Wrong. Nephlims are still given the death sentence for even the smallest of indiscretions. Death might be more sympathetic than he originally let on though."

(Thank you for all the help by the way!)

 

[Elim]

I like the repetition of the first one.

 

[MajorKerina]

A few thoughts, I like your thirteen years ago opener but if you want to also do "It starts with" I would pick out one since it starting several times is a bit unwieldly to process. Let me see umm.

It starts with the girl with the bleeding hair in the middle of the monster filled mountains
It ends when every shard drowns and nothing remains of what they once knew...

Thirteen years ago there was a massacre. A witch hunt of the worst kind with the ashes of innocents falling from the sky.

Now the world is made up of fragile glass, the cracks sharp and jagged. (You can replace your lines where you like)

The world waits, hatred curling deep in the crimson sea boiling right beneath the surface. All it takes is one wrong move.

Someone who takes a life that was never theirs to take.

A <kingdom> falls apart (replace with what Mihr is)

A boy is asked if he wants to change the world.

A bloody smile is followed by an apology...

This is the story about the second war between nephlims and humans.

This is the story of how everything ends.

 

[SwirlyUnicorn]

A few thoughts, I like your thirteen years ago opener but if you want to also do "It starts with" I would pick out one since it starting several times is a bit unwieldly to process. Let me see umm.

It starts with the girl with the bleeding hair in the middle of the monster filled mountains
It ends when every shard drowns and nothing remains of what they once knew...

Thirteen years ago there was a massacre. A witch hunt of the worst kind with the ashes of innocents falling from the sky.

Now the world is made up of fragile glass, the cracks sharp and jagged. (You can replace your lines where you like)

The world waits, hatred curling deep in the crimson sea boiling right beneath the surface. All it takes is one wrong move.

Someone who takes a life that was never theirs to take.

A <kingdom> falls apart (replace with what Mihr is)

A boy is asked if he wants to change the world.

A bloody smile is followed by an apology...

This is the story about the second war between nephlims and humans.

This is the story of how everything ends.

I love this! I think this is more of a page turner.

 

[SwirlyUnicorn]

Hmm, like maybe:
"Felix has been working on his plan for years going the nice gentle route that Rizeal wants. It hasn't worked, hybrid nephlims are still illegal and nephlims are still being killed for petty crimes so, he's going to change their tactics to something a bit more threatening. If the CME won't listen to peace, they'll listen to violence.

Malakai has been hunting a nephlim serial killer for the past four months and then things take a turn for the worst in the tiny town of Demsen. They're so close, he can taste victory. Unfortunately, the sweet taste of victory does not last long as he gets lost in the Qleehl mountains. In fact, it takes a distinct sour taste when the serial killer he was hunting finds him instead.

Odaix just got out of officer training for the CME and her mentor is the infamous Death. An off-putting nickname that she soon learns he rightfully earned because- all of the things she learned about the experimental nephlim prison? Wrong. Nephlims are still given the death sentence for even the smallest of indiscretions. Death might be more sympathetic than he originally let on though."

(Thank you for all the help by the way!)

I think this part is perfect for the Prologue and not the sypnosis.

 

[GhostlyArtz]

A few thoughts, I like your thirteen years ago opener but if you want to also do "It starts with" I would pick out one since it starting several times is a bit unwieldly to process. Let me see umm.

Did some tweaking to better fit how the story goes so:

It starts when someone takes a life that was never theirs to take.
It ends when every shard drowns and nothing remains of what they once knew.

Thirteen years ago there was a massacre; a witch hunt of the worst kind with the ashes of innocents falling from the sky.

Now, the world is made up of fragile glass, the cracks sharp and jagged. Hatred boils the crimson sea beneath the surface. All it takes is one wrong move-

A boy is asked if he wants to change the world.

A bloody smile with an unspoken apology.

A girl with bleeding hair in the monster filled mountains.

A change in destiny.

-for it to shatter.

This is the story about the second war between nephlims and humans.

This is the story of how everything ends.

Again, thank you so much for the feedback and advice!

I think this part is perfect for the Prologue and not the sypnosis.

Those are actually really short summaries on the first two-three chapters of each individual POV haha. The prologue I currently have features an event right after the first war when one of the laws gets passed.

 

[blazjindanblue]

(Overall help) How does one write an interesting synopsis for multiple characters? Any and all advise is appreciated

And then for specific help: Hello, so I've been struggling with my synopsis since the beginning of time. And I kind of made it difficult for myself to begin with since my story is about several different characters with very different story threads and then an over arching plot to tie it all together. And I'm not sure how to go about with getting a synopsis that conveys part of it, or all of it? I'm not the best at explaining things without spoiling so...

Spoiler: Story info

So over arching plot is about a civil war. A very slow build civil war that's broken up in the span of a trilogy. Beginning, middle end.
But then for characters you got: Malakai- kidnapped by a serial killer and he's going to try to escape; Felix- working on a civil rights movement; Odaix- learning the horrors of her reality and trying to convert an... 'evil' person into 'good'; Pete- Trying to get rid of magic; Zamron- trying to enact revenge on the people that killed his daughter
(And they all have an effect on the way the over arching plot goes)

Spoiler: Synopsis attempts

Thirteen years ago there was a massacre. A witch hunt of the worst kind with the ashes of innocents falling from the sky.

Now the world is made up of fragile glass, the cracks sharp and jagged. Something that cuts easily and deep, blood dripping from its shards.

The world waits in baited breathe, hatred curling deep in the crimson sea boiling right beneath the surface. All it takes is one wrong move and then everything shatters and the world is flooded with blood.

It starts with the girl with the bleeding hair in the middle of the monster filled mountains.

It starts when Ann takes a life that was never hers to take.

It starts with Felix asking a boy if he wants to change the world.

It starts when Mihr falls apart.

It starts with a bloody smile and an apology.

It ends when every shard drowns and nothing remains of what they once knew.

(Basically trying to name drop or reference most of the important characters with vague mentions of actual story events, but I was told it has no clarity on the actual events of the story)
----------------------------------------------------
Felix stares at the boy curled in a ball in a broken alleyway. "I have an offer."

The boy looks up, amber eyes watching as he prepares himself to bolt from the supposed threat. Felix can't help the smile that crawls across his face as he entreats,

"It's nothing bad. Promise. It's just, I'm tired of hiding. I'm tired of watching people die over stupid things. I'm tired of being afraid. Surely you understand?"

"I'm not-"

Felix shushes the cowering child, "You don't need to be a nephlim to want to make the world better for them. That's the bright side of being human, you can be selfless if you want to be. You can make life better for others and not worry about not being included. Do you want to?"

The boy furrows his brows as he asks, "Want to what?"

"Change the world."

This is a story about how it can take the smallest things to start an avalanche. This is how a world made of glass shatters and everyone finds themselves freefalling into the abyss.

This is how everything begins and how everything ends.
(The current one I am going with, but- it has a heavy reference on Felix so I think it would lead people to believe that the story is Felix centric when it is not. Or, it might not set things properly?)
-------------------------------------------------------------
Sixteen years ago a disease decimated the population. It was said to be a gift from the godling of witchcraft herself, and that those unable to use her gift were doomed to die.

Thirteen years ago there was a war between those who were blessed by Anate and those who were cursed.

That war ended with a witch hunt, the ashes of the innocents falling from the sky. Now, nephlims have to be careful. They have to be wary on what they do, who they interact with, and the possible consequences of any negative action. This is a story about how it all changes.

This is how the very beginning of life starts changing and corrupting around its inhabitants. This is how everything beneath their feet shatters and they are left to fall into the abyss.

This is a story about the second war between nephlims and humans.

This is a story on how everything ends.
(This is another one I scribbled down as a possibility)

But, any advice or help would be greatly appreciated!

Too many paragraphs for a synopsis!

 

[blazjindanblue]

A story about a dude from Central Europe, meeting his faith-truck head on. Then he becomes a dwarf. Yes, this is the story about a handsome dwarf fighting together with exploding unicorns against an empire of nazi catgirls.
Join Big Junk and Boomer in an epic adventure against the nazi empress Awfur Kittler.
Will they be able to prevail? Or will the races be trampled and crushed underneath the nazi catgirl's boot?

Something like this and of about the same length adressing the reader, describing the setting, perhaps making it a bit similar to the other stories or what your targeted audience or an appeal to the reader that you want to attract/the story is for.

 

[SwirlyUnicorn]

A story about a dude from Central Europe, meeting his faith-truck head on. Then he becomes a dwarf. Yes, this is the story about a handsome dwarf fighting together with exploding unicorns against an empire of nazi catgirls.
Join Big Junk and Boomer in an epic adventure against the nazi empress Awfur Kittler.
Will they be able to prevail? Or will the races be trampled and crushed underneath the nazi catgirl's boot?

Something like this and of about the same length adressing the reader, describing the setting, perhaps making it a bit similar to the other stories or what your targeted audience or an appeal to the reader that you want to attract/the story is for.

Yeah short and simple