Life Advice? (Dark Topic)

[Lysander_Works]

What do we do when we're in a total life slump? I feel the crushing weight of every issue around me caving in, and it feels like, ever time I take a step forward, I also am pushed back two more...

I know it's a complex topic, but just, how do people live in this world sometimes, I wonder...

 

[Assurbanipal_II]

What do we do when we're in a total life slump? I feel the crushing weight of every issue around me caving in, and it feels like, ever time I take a step forward, I also am pushed back two more...

I know it's a complex topic, but just, how do people live in this world sometimes, I wonder...

Going outside and reading something in the sun while resting on the grass~.

 

[Lysander_Works]

Going outside and reading something in the sun while resting on the grass~.

Hm, it's just a temporary escape from reality, a reality I want to build back better with my own two hands...

 

[Worthy39]

Hm, it's just a temporary escape from reality, a reality I want to build back better with my own two hands...

There's not really much advice that can help you. Sure, maybe someone will say something helpful, but you need to find something that inspires you, specifically. I'm just coming out of a situation like that myself, and for me, I felt inspired by so many things, but it just wasn't enough to get back up. So, I slowly added a little bit to my daily routine, and now I'm at least functioning at the level of a normal person. It still sucks, but it's getting better.

What I can say worked for me though, is that if there's something you've wanted to do, do it. Even if you start small, sprinkle a little bit into your routine and keep adding up until you can confidently say you're okay. For me, I wanted to get in better shape, catch up on my writing, and learn to do a handstand. Have I accomplished any of that? Not really! But it's a start, and I can honestly say I'm feeling a lot better than I was before, and I've made progress in my goals, at least. It's different for everyone, but if there's something you've been wanting to do that you can do, go for it. It won't magically fix everything, you won't wake up the next day and think everything is amazing, but it helps, at least. It gives you some sense of accomplishment, however small.

 

[Lysander_Works]

There's not really much advice that can help you. Sure, maybe someone will say something helpful, but you need to find something that inspires you, specifically. I'm just coming out of a situation like that myself, and for me, I felt inspired by so many things, but it just wasn't enough to get back up. So, I slowly added a little bit to my daily routine, and now I'm at least functioning at the level of a normal person. It still sucks, but it's getting better.

What I can say worked for me though, is that if there's something you've wanted to do, do it. Even if you start small, sprinkle a little bit into your routine and keep adding up until you can confidently say you're okay. For me, I wanted to get in better shape, catch up on my writing, and learn to do a handstand. Have I accomplished any of that? Not really! But it's a start, and I can honestly say I'm feeling a lot better than I was before, and I've made progress in my goals, at least. It's different for everyone, but if there's something you've been wanting to do that you can do, go for it. It won't magically fix everything, you won't wake up the next day and think everything is amazing, but it helps, at least. It gives you some sense of accomplishment, however small.

Yeah, I know... I've got issues that I feel like I can't control even in the slightest.
A health disability that is ruining my ability to, well, live, essentially. I'm close to a point where I won't be able to work any normal job, thus can't get any income, thus can't clutch to any hope that anything will get better. That situation is still in variance for now, as I'm seeing dozens of doctors, but treatment options are looking more and more limited by each week. (And I have no faith the Disabilities office would be of any help).

Some of it is of course, financial stress too though. I'm current a part time worker at [Dump Factory #99] making nearly zilch, and finding a better job is made difficult by the medical situation listed above (even if I find something, land interview, whose to say how long it will last if complications arise from time to time)?

I've learned that, if it feels like I can at least control the issues, I can maintain my confidence long term, but at the moment, it's more like an uncertain spiral, involving many things I want and need to do that are just out of reach. The biggest source of the stress though, involves the uncertainty that I will be able to treat the disease. If it gets worse, it isn't the kind of thing one can just 'live with,' unless free money is somehow coming in, which I doubt I could achieve, having little knowledge and faith about even looking down that tunnel...

 

[Worthy39]

Yeah, I know... I've got issues that I feel like I can't control even in the slightest.
A health disability that is ruining my ability to, well, live, essentially. I'm close to a point where I won't be able to work any normal job, thus can't get any income, thus can't clutch to any hope that anything will get better. That situation is still in variance for now, as I'm seeing dozens of doctors, but treatment options are looking more and more limited by each week. (And I have no faith the Disabilities office would be of any help).

Some of it is of course, financial stress too though. I'm current a part time worker at [Dump Factory #99] making nearly zilch, and finding a better job is made difficult by the medical situation listed above (even if I find something, land interview, whose to say how long it will last if complications arise from time to time)?

I've learned that, if it feels like I can at least control the issues, I can maintain my confidence long term, but at the moment, it's more like an uncertain spiral, involving many things I want and need to do that are just out of reach. The biggest source of the stress though, involves the uncertainty that I will be able to treat the disease. If it gets worse, it isn't the kind of thing one can just 'live with,' unless free money is somehow coming in, which I doubt I could achieve, having little knowledge and faith about even looking down that tunnel...

Well, street begging is always an option, those guys make bank. But jokes aside, that's not an easy situation, it's scary, you don't know if you can recover, and... I said that like I had a third thing. Anyway, if you can't control the situation, sometimes you just have to let it go. Worrying about it won't fix it. You just have to do everything you can, and focus on what you can control right now. If you spend the rest of your life worrying, it'll be a miserable time, trust me, I've seen that much firsthand. Not to mention, stress can sometimes be more dangerous than the disease. I've met people who got terribly ill, and ended up sick for so much longer than they should've due to stress. So all you can do right now is ask yourself what you can do, and what you can control. And if you can, try to do something you enjoy, at least.

 

[Lysander_Works]

Well, street begging is always an option, those guys make bank. But jokes aside, that's not an easy situation, it's scary, you don't know if you can recover, and... I said that like I had a third thing. Anyway, if you can't control the situation, sometimes you just have to let it go. Worrying about it won't fix it. You just have to do everything you can, and focus on what you can control right now. If you spend the rest of your life worrying, it'll be a miserable time, trust me, I've seen that much firsthand. Not to mention, stress can sometimes be more dangerous than the disease. I've met people who got terribly ill, and ended up sick for so much longer than they should've due to stress. So all you can do right now is ask yourself what you can do, and what you can control. And if you can, try to do something you enjoy, at least.

I do find some of this agreeable, but, it's very difficult not to worry about it. My overall thoughts edge too closely to... well, I'm sure I don't really need to say it out loud. It really is that bad, when there is no active way to treat it at least.

Focusing exclusively on what I can control, it's what I've been doing all along. Even though I've set things up as best as I can, somehow, I'm still losing that hope and confidence I once had, of getting better. Maybe that's just how I am, or maybe it only feels that way because, there is no backup option if things truly get to the point I fear them to.

... I guess, if worse comes to pass, I would at least still take on the challenge of moving, moving somewhere nicer, with possible opportunity, even at the risk that I would be that bum on the street begging for food or money.

 

[Jerynboe]

The best advice I can give you, and it won’t be easy, is to write out four things.

1. Best case realistic scenario. If luck favors you and everything comes up aces, but no miracles happen like a random billionaire covering all your expenses, what does that look like?

2. Worst case realistic scenario. Same rules. Don’t assume god hates you, just assume you never get lucky and whenever something bad could happen, it does. I’ll be level, this could be really bad, I don’t know the details of your situation. However, anxiety is far more about the unknown than the known. Looking at the worst case scenario can help the anxiety. Make it less scary by engaging with it clinically, as if it were a thought experiment. The monster in the movie can be horrifying, but it’s always scariest before you see it.

3. Make as complete a plan as you can for what to do to nudge the odds in your favor to make the best case scenario in 1 happen. Lay out what you can do, and do research to either confirm or counter any assumptions you may have.

4. Make as complete a plan as you can for what to do if the worst case scenario in 2 happens. If that means researching proper techniques for begging? Go for it. Find out the best places for being a homeless beggar, and plan around that. Figure out what is possible with government programs and research charities. Make no assumptions about what will or won’t work. Have a to do list so that you have a fallback position even if it’s a shitty one.

If it doesn’t sound appealing, then ignore me. With that said, you’re asking random people on the internet for advice so I’m assuming you’re at the “random bullshit go” stage and this is the best random bullshit I’ve got. Good luck, and I hope something in this thread helps you in some way.

 

[Lysander_Works]

The best advice I can give you, and it won’t be easy, is to write out four things.

1. Best case realistic scenario. If luck favors you and everything comes up aces, but no miracles happen like a random billionaire covering all your expenses, what does that look like?

2. Worst case realistic scenario. Same rules. Don’t assume god hates you, just assume you never get lucky and whenever something bad could happen, it does. I’ll be level, this could be really bad, I don’t know the details of your situation. However, anxiety is far more about the unknown than the known. Looking at the worst case scenario can help the anxiety. Make it less scary by engaging with it clinically, as if it were a thought experiment. The monster in the movie can be horrifying, but it’s always scariest before you see it.

3. Make as complete a plan as you can for what to do to nudge the odds in your favor to make the best case scenario in 1 happen. Lay out what you can do, and do research to either confirm or counter any assumptions you may have.

4. Make as complete a plan as you can for what to do if the worst case scenario in 2 happens. If that means researching proper techniques for begging? Go for it. Find out the best places for being a homeless beggar, and plan around that. Figure out what is possible with government programs and research charities. Make no assumptions about what will or won’t work. Have a to do list so that you have a fallback position even if it’s a shitty one.

If it doesn’t sound appealing, then ignore me. With that said, you’re asking random people on the internet for advice so I’m assuming you’re at the “random bullshit go” stage and this is the best random bullshit I’ve got. Good luck, and I hope something in this thread helps you in some way.

Not too far off. I suppose I would feel better by digging research into how to live as a homeless. Even a not fun backup plan would quell me just a little.

 

[TASTYLEADPAINT]

If you can. Going to the gym and lifting heavy stuff can help alleviate the issue.

But if you want to deal with them. I would start on the smallest issue first and snowball from there.

Getting the small wins where you can really helps

 

[Lysander_Works]

I can do small workouts, nothing enough for a gym yet.