Is it true that female writers are better at writing romance?

[Bartun]

I don't think that's true. Some of the best romances were written by women, and so were the worst. Female authors on average have more dating experience than male authors, but this doesn't necessarily translate into better books. Just take a look at "50 Shades of Grey" for example.

There are excellent romance writers around, both male and female, and I think in order to write a good romance first you need appealing characters. If the MCs are the stereotypical flat empty characters of course their romance will seem forced and unnatural, that's also why in some series the background characters have more chemistry than the protagonists.

But if your MCs are rounded, fleshed out, well-developed characters, each with their own dreams and goals, and if there is good chemistry and tension between them, the resulting romance can be thrilling, exciting to watch, and you will soon find yourself rooting for them. The timing is also important because making the character fall too soon comes as rushed, but if the author keeps pushing the romance further only to lead to nothing is a sure way to piss off your audience.

 

[Deleted member 19066]

Awww~ don't say that you will make Nicholas Sparks cry

Nicholas Sparks makes other people cry not the other way around

 

[georgelee5786]

I feel like it is sort of true but not 100% true. let me know your thoughts on this

Romance geared towards women, yes. Romance geared towards men, no

 

[MorgueAnna]

No. Outside of generalizations, nothing is 100%. Don't be so down on cis dudes, give them a chance and they can figure it out. (We're gonna ignore trans folks for the rest of my post because it seems like the question is about cis women.) It's true that you see more mediocre "male gaze-y" attempts in published media, but that's a byproduct of not thinking women are people and because women's writing is not always taken seriously. ("Mary Sues" are demonized for a reason. People love shitting on the interests of teenage girls.) Society may have set them up for failure, but I have no doubt that men can write good romance and women can write mediocre romance. It's all up to the reader's individual sensibilities, as well.
You can see some examples of "men writing women" collected from various authors. People poke fun at it because it's a great guide of "what not to do." There's a satiric phrase that reflects this sort of writing:

At the same time there are women who also write romance poorly.

I don't read romance, generally speaking. But I've encountered romantic scenes in books outside of the genre that absolutely clicked for me. Check out this quote from Neil Gaiman's The Kindly Ones.

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”

That right there? Accurate. I've felt that. That is some truth-y writing. Meanwhile, stuff like bodice rippers do nothing for me except occasionally making me laugh. Check out this collection of Lesbian stories for Horse girls (fans of horses, specifically not pretty derby anime girls.) It gets pretty wild how low the quality dips.

Cheering for you all, romance writers.

 

[LABmaiL]

If I look at two writers that I feel are on the same footing for romance, I generally will find a male perspective to be more investing for myself. However, I feel that if I were a girl, it'd probably be the other way around. I feel like it depends on which is which. Of course, if you take into account the actual amount of writers for the romance genre, I feel like generally more romance is geared towards girls than boys. This can show with there being many more female romance writers than male romance writers. Of course the more experienced writers will write better on average. As such, I think it's a matter of experience rather than gender.
I looked a bit further at some other people's points on this thread and I've gotta just emphasize this one by forli since I feel it's completely right: Since there are more female romance writers, they probably have a larger amount of writing on both extremes. There is probably more good and more bad on the female side than the male side simply because most males don't write romance.

 

[Irl_Rat]

That right there? Accurate. I've felt that. That is some truth-y writing. Meanwhile, stuff like bodice rippers do nothing for me except occasionally making me laugh. Check out this collection of Lesbian stories for Horse girls (fans of horses, specifically not pretty derby anime girls.) It gets pretty wild how low the quality dips.

"A girl has needs that even the best horse can't satisfy..." Think I've seen that in an offbrand anime before.

On a sidenote, in regards to cis male authors being trash at writing, part of the problem might be that some of those authors are middle aged coomers with "interesting" views on women. Similar things can be observed when looking at horny women writing about men in their fantasies.

 

[Sabruness]

Female writers are generally better at writing romances geared for female audiences.

this.
also, i would like to point out that romance novels with utterly shitty MLs (you know the kinds) seem to be overwhelmingly written by women both in the west and east which ties into Longer's very good point. 50 shades being a very prominent example (not to mention twilight)

 

[Grandloaf]

They are usually unrealistic

 

[Temple]

Female writers are generally better at writing romances geared for female audiences.

This is true. Take Fifty Shades of Grey and Twilight. More accurate perhaps to say romance fantasies. But if you'll be strict about romance genre, then male authors dominate it. But if you include Fifty Shades and Twilight, then lol those are the top sold books in history so they win.

 

[Serolithia]

Generally it is considered that females are often better empaths or at least tend to have a more solid base on the feel of emotions, but that doesn't mean it translates to them writing better romance.
Romance has a lot of depth and perspectives, a lot of colours and shades, many ways to have it interpreted.

It's not about gender, it's about the person themselves. Male or female doesn't matter, just the author as a person.

 

[Deleted member 57675]

No. Idk. Haven't read much in awhile. I think there are bad romance writers on both sides of the aisle. There are ones I've read that make me eyeroll (wattpad, harelquinn romance) and then there are ones that make me go aww how wholesome.

The more better question to be is how to write a good romance without turning a character's personality and intellect upside down, inside out, a total cringe.

 

[RepresentingCaution]

Females are generally more attentive and responsive to emotions than males. The key word here is GENERALLY. Generalizations do not apply to individual variations.

Whether this is due to cultural conditioning or fundamental differences in biology is still under investigation.

 

[gaylolis]

depends on the romance, i guess.

my kind of romance has something to do with assembling big-ass guns and mow down an entire world of vermins, with tons of micheal bay approved explosions.

if turning into a girl let you wrote them better, let me know.