I need advice on narration

[PinkLemon]

Hi! I'm a novice author and I started posting my web novel a few months ago. I had already written one before, but I didn't like the format anymore, so I rewrote almost everything.

With the new format, I prefer to write the chapters in the first person (usually the main character, but with a few exceptions). The problem is that during fight scenes, I tend to use an external narrator who narrates what is happening.

So my question is, should I make the narrator's "voice" similar to that of my main character, or should I let the narrator have their own "voice" at the risk of confusing readers?

Kikai Unmei

Kikai, a supernatural ability granted at birth, meant to guide humans toward their deepest ambition. Harumaki Yuuki, a young man with an emotionless face, has a simple ambition: to find Marie, the girl destiny tore away from him. The path to that miracle runs through one thing: winning the...

www.scribblehub.com

 

[MakBow]

I would say it depends on how you structure it, at least for me.

You could just have your MC describe everything as they see it and that would make it fine.
Like you said, just make the narrator sound like your MC.

Or you can make sure that you signal that a narration change is happening from first to third.

What I use to signal a narration change:
◇ ◇ ◇
but sometimes you can just do:
...
or anything else.

And if it happens consistently, it lets your readers know what it means, preventing confusion.

But that's just me, I don't know if I'm helpful

 

[Eldoria]

Have you read my thread about living character voices?

A character's voice can be said to come to life if it has unique characteristics, usually based on experience, character, and worldview. To identify it, you can create a voice that readers recognise (familiar) without mentioning the character's name (such as Amy said, Harry said, etc).

Back to your question, does the narrator's voice have to be distinguished from the character's voice?

It depends on which POV you use.

1. First-person POV, character voice = narrator.
2. Limited third-person POV = character voice. Narrator = limited observer of the world (usually not reliable).

If you use first-person POV, differentiating the narrator's voice from the MC's is irrelevant.

If you use limited third-person POV, your well-designed character's voice will inherently have a unique voice that makes it different from both the voices of other characters and the narrator's voice.

And for the narrator, the voice usually tends to be neutral because it only tells or describes the state of the world.

Hopefully, this answers your question. Regards.

Edit:
Your confusion about depicting battles from the first-person perspective illustrates the inherent weakness of the first-person perspective. It's difficult to depict battles tactically and spatially using only the character's perception. The solution?

If you're obsessed with first-person perspective, it probably won't help. The alternative of switching to a limited third-person perspective is more realistic and easier to implement to overcome the limitations of character perception in depicting battles. It's best to write battles from a limited third-person perspective.

Writing - How do you make your character's voice come alive in dialogue?

Living Character Voices in Dialogue Every character has a unique personality that makes them a complete individual. Indeed, some characters may have similar personalities. Empathy, anger, assertiveness, etc, can be possessed by anyone. However, unique characters usually emphasize one or more...

forum.scribblehub.com

 

[FRWriter]

I dislike constantly switching narrators. It gets confusing.

Also, if you use a third-person narrator for fights, does that mean that the reader does not get to know the MC's thoughts and feelings during the battle? Feels like a really silly idea. Or do you simply narrate his feelings in the third person?

 

[Xeoz]

If you can write the seperate pov in a different chapter. Go for it.

 

[CharlesEBrown]

Hi! I'm a novice author and I started posting my web novel a few months ago. I had already written one before, but I didn't like the format anymore, so I rewrote almost everything.

With the new format, I prefer to write the chapters in the first person (usually the main character, but with a few exceptions). The problem is that during fight scenes, I tend to use an external narrator who narrates what is happening.

So my question is, should I make the narrator's "voice" similar to that of my main character, or should I let the narrator have their own "voice" at the risk of confusing readers?

Kikai Unmei

Kikai, a supernatural ability granted at birth, meant to guide humans toward their deepest ambition. Harumaki Yuuki, a young man with an emotionless face, has a simple ambition: to find Marie, the girl destiny tore away from him. The path to that miracle runs through one thing: winning the...

www.scribblehub.com

Just watched the first episode of a K-Drama called Ca$hero where it kind of does this - the MC narrates each episode and provides running commentary (even when he's not in a scene) but the whole story seems to be third person. It's jarring enough in a purely visual medium and would take a VERY skilled writer to pull off in straight text without really confusing the reader.
If you think you're up to it, either have the MC BE the narrator or make the narrator's voice very different from the MC - one or the other. Don't make it similar or it will be confusing, possibly even to YOU, let alone to a reader.

 

[NullAButton]

Keep in mind the narrator is the one who's telling your story to your readers. First person narration strips the convenience of 'omniscience' away. So any non-narrator character emotions, internal thoughts, reasoning behind their actions, etc, etc, all are first signaled to the narrator, who then infers from the said signals and then finally delivers their interpretation to the reader. (By ‘signals,’ I mean observable behavior from other characters that the narrator must interpret.)
Basically : Other character → emits signals → narrator perceives → narrator interprets → reader receives interpretation.

You will need to craft a set of such information-carrying signals, and devise circumstances in which the narrator is there to observe those signals (or hear from someone who's observed the said signals firsthand), and then have the narrator internally interpret them in a way that is in line with the character traits, prior knowledge and experience, and, most-importantly, your intention (to what extent you want the reader to be informed).
If done well, your characters and the world you build become believable. If done poorly, the reader will immediately point out "Wait, how does the MC know that?"

For your fight scene, for example, the signals your narrator observes would be the opponent's body languages, momentum shifts, breathing patterns, noises, etc, etc. So if you pack enough information into these and have your narrator (MC) act and think accordingly, you won't need to shift voices.

 

[MFontana]

Hi! I'm a novice author and I started posting my web novel a few months ago. I had already written one before, but I didn't like the format anymore, so I rewrote almost everything.

With the new format, I prefer to write the chapters in the first person (usually the main character, but with a few exceptions). The problem is that during fight scenes, I tend to use an external narrator who narrates what is happening.

So my question is, should I make the narrator's "voice" similar to that of my main character, or should I let the narrator have their own "voice" at the risk of confusing readers?

Kikai Unmei

Kikai, a supernatural ability granted at birth, meant to guide humans toward their deepest ambition. Harumaki Yuuki, a young man with an emotionless face, has a simple ambition: to find Marie, the girl destiny tore away from him. The path to that miracle runs through one thing: winning the...

www.scribblehub.com

Personally, I'd say cut the "narrator" entirely if you're writing the narrative in first person. Just stick to the PoV you want to use throughout.

Consistency is important, and sharp, or sudden, changes in perspective can be jarring to a reader.

If you're intent on using the 'narrator' PoV, then it may be better to stick to Third-Person Limited and maintain the Narrator's PoV indefinitely throughout.

Switching between the two isn't really something I can suggest in good-faith, especially if it is planned to be done frequently, so I really do need to advise against doing so.

Ultimately, though, it's your story to write and only you can decide how you want to tell it; so do what works best for you.

 

[PinkLemon]

I would say it depends on how you structure it, at least for me.

You could just have your MC describe everything as they see it and that would make it fine.
Like you said, just make the narrator sound like your MC.

Or you can make sure that you signal that a narration change is happening from first to third.

What I use to signal a narration change:
◇ ◇ ◇
but sometimes you can just do:
...
or anything else.

And if it happens consistently, it lets your readers know what it means, preventing confusion.

But that's just me, I don't know if I'm helpful

Thank you for your reply! The narration change is a good idea if I handle it well. I'll see how it sounds in my head and if it fits with how I write.

Have you read my thread about living character voices?

A character's voice can be said to come to life if it has unique characteristics, usually based on experience, character, and worldview. To identify it, you can create a voice that readers recognise (familiar) without mentioning the character's name (such as Amy said, Harry said, etc).

Back to your question, does the narrator's voice have to be distinguished from the character's voice?

It depends on which POV you use.

1. First-person POV, character voice = narrator.
2. Limited third-person POV = character voice. Narrator = limited observer of the world (usually not reliable).

If you use first-person POV, differentiating the narrator's voice from the MC's is irrelevant.

If you use limited third-person POV, your well-designed character's voice will inherently have a unique voice that makes it different from both the voices of other characters and the narrator's voice.

And for the narrator, the voice usually tends to be neutral because it only tells or describes the state of the world.

Hopefully, this answers your question. Regards.

Edit:
Your confusion about depicting battles from the first-person perspective illustrates the inherent weakness of the first-person perspective. It's difficult to depict battles tactically and spatially using only the character's perception. The solution?

If you're obsessed with first-person perspective, it probably won't help. The alternative of switching to a limited third-person perspective is more realistic and easier to implement to overcome the limitations of character perception in depicting battles. It's best to write battles from a limited third-person perspective.

Writing - How do you make your character's voice come alive in dialogue?

Living Character Voices in Dialogue Every character has a unique personality that makes them a complete individual. Indeed, some characters may have similar personalities. Empathy, anger, assertiveness, etc, can be possessed by anyone. However, unique characters usually emphasize one or more...

forum.scribblehub.com

I kind of see what you mean. Using a limited third-person POV seems viable. I still have some work to do to really differentiate the characters' voices in my writing, so I'm not quite sure how I'm going to go about it yet, but thanks to your advice, I have an idea of what to try. So, thank you very much!!

I dislike constantly switching narrators. It gets confusing.

Also, if you use a third-person narrator for fights, does that mean that the reader does not get to know the MC's thoughts and feelings during the battle? Feels like a really silly idea. Or do you simply narrate his feelings in the third person?

Switching POVs might be an option, but I think that by following the advice to use a limited third-person POV, I can try to keep the narration close to the main character's voice. As for the main character's thoughts, I guess I can try to have them spoken in the narration. Thank you for your response! Getting multiple opinions really helps me a lot!!

Just watched the first episode of a K-Drama called Ca$hero where it kind of does this - the MC narrates each episode and provides running commentary (even when he's not in a scene) but the whole story seems to be third person. It's jarring enough in a purely visual medium and would take a VERY skilled writer to pull off in straight text without really confusing the reader.
If you think you're up to it, either have the MC BE the narrator or make the narrator's voice very different from the MC - one or the other. Don't make it similar, or it will be confusing, possibly even to YOU, let alone to a reader.

Ah, I see... reading the advice, I thought that making the voice of the main character and that of the limited third-person narration similar would make things less confusing And most importantly, I think I greatly misunderstood what a limited third-person POV is actually... I don't really feel capable of following your advice to make the main character the sole narrator in the text, especially since there are inevitably moments when he is not directly involved in the story, and that I'm not very good at writing. Still, it's an interesting option, and I appreciate your advice a lot!!