I have news and need some help! Please?

[Sebas_Guzman]

After 23 years, I finally got a girlfriend! However, neither of us has ever been on a date before so I need ideas. Hell, I thought I would die alone before the age of 50 so this came out of nowhere. My first thought was the aquarium since we both love that but I'm unsure. If you would be so kind as to give me some wisdom on where we should go and where to eat (preferably in Chicago), I would be much obliged.

As a harem author, I can offer nothing to help you.

As a introverted person with enough dating experience to get stalked and then married, (to not the same person), I can totally give you ideas!

First, avoid movies for the first few dates. Movies are pretty much where you go after you're solid. They prevent you from talking, which is what you need to do. Exceptions apply. For instance, if the movie is part of a larger day, in which case, the movie provides common talking points.

Second, don't get nervous. You need to have the confidence of someone in middle management at least. Pick a goal to focus on for the occasion and use that if you're the nervous type. Ideally, you want to be in a place where you exude the energy that you can handle anything life throws at you AND are happy to be spending time with your special someone.

Don't be a dick... Unless you met the other person in a club.

Don't go to a club. Unless you are totally acquainted with club culture.

Don't ask her if she's okay more than seven times. Do not ask for feedback until the date's over and you're finished internally destroying yourself over all the bonehead moves you pulled on the date..

The aquarium is nice. Make sure to see penguins if possible.

For food, honestly, anywhere is good. If you go to a fast food place, there's less pressure to talk. Going to a high end place is a lot of effort and not casual, and you should only do it if both parties do well in high end places.

The name of the game is to not center the entire experience around her. It's about both you and her. You need to show competence enough to be decisive while kind.

Don't be a worrywart unless you can make it funny.

Remember, a girlfriend is just a friend with higher priorities associated. You should treat her like a friend at minimum and as someone special during those sweet moments. Some people forget what it's like to hang out with friends when they get nervous. Friends don't have awkward silences.

 

[Representing_Tromba]

As a harem author, I can offer nothing to help you.

As a introverted person with enough dating experience to get stalked and then married, (to not the same person), I can totally give you ideas!

First, avoid movies for the first few dates. Movies are pretty much where you go after you're solid. They prevent you from talking, which is what you need to do. Exceptions apply. For instance, if the movie is part of a larger day, in which case, the movie provides common talking points.

Second, don't get nervous. You need to have the confidence of someone in middle management at least. Pick a goal to focus on for the occasion and use that if you're the nervous type. Ideally, you want to be in a place where you exude the energy that you can handle anything life throws at you AND are happy to be spending time with your special someone.

Don't be a dick... Unless you met the other person in a club.

Don't go to a club. Unless you are totally acquainted with club culture.

Don't ask her if she's okay more than seven times. Do not ask for feedback until the date's over and you're finished internally destroying yourself over all the bonehead moves you pulled on the date..

The aquarium is nice. Make sure to see penguins if possible.

For food, honestly, anywhere is good. If you go to a fast food place, there's less pressure to talk. Going to a high end place is a lot of effort and not casual, and you should only do it if both parties do well in high end places.

The name of the game is to not center the entire experience around her. It's about both you and her. You need to show competence enough to be decisive while kind.

Don't be a worrywart unless you can make it funny.

Remember, a girlfriend is just a friend with higher priorities associated. You should treat her like a friend at minimum and as someone special during those sweet moments. Some people forget what it's like to hang out with friends when they get nervous. Friends don't have awkward silences.

This is solid advice

 

[miyoga]

Aquarium/zoo, definitely a good start. If neither of you have done the Willis tower, that could be interesting. If it was still winter I'd say to go ice skating at the bean, but it's spring (if she's into architecture, there's the Frank Lloyd Wright house, not massively interesting but still interesting enough).

For food, Chinatown has an incredibly authentic dim sum place. As in, you order off/take from the carts that they bring by and not from a menu. They have a card at the table to keep track of what was eaten and it's marked by the cart people. Otherwise I've been away from the area for too long and only ever did day trips from Iowa before that.

 

[Representing_Tromba]

Congratulations......

Aquarium/zoo, definitely a good start. If neither of you have done the Willis tower, that could be interesting. If it was still winter I'd say to go ice skating at the bean, but it's spring (if she's into architecture, there's the Frank Lloyd Wright house, not massively interesting but still interesting enough).

For food, Chinatown has an incredibly authentic dim sum place. As in, you order off/take from the carts that they bring by and not from a menu. They have a card at the table to keep track of what was eaten and it's marked by the cart people. Otherwise I've been away from the area for too long and only ever did day trips from Iowa before that.

I think I've been to that dim sum place. It would be a great place to go.

 

[TheMonotonePuppet]

Friends don't have awkward silences.

I all of a sudden feel really alone now.

 

[Paul__Michaels]

Congratulations! Possible fun first date would be going out to a climbing gym.

 

[BB_Tensei]

Anything can do as a date, so long as you can have a good time talking and messing around. You can play a game of "do you know that place?" and if you don't, you go there and check it out.

 

[Representing_Tromba]

I all of a sudden feel really alone now.

Don't be.

 

[gaylolis]

how about cooking together? especially pineapple on pizza.

as an indoors type, if someone i love ask me to go out i will give them several reasons why i prefer staying at home.

i personally hate any crowded places, including aquariums. it might be worth visiting if i caught several marine creatures indulging in shameless act.

 

[Representing_Tromba]

how about cooking together? especially pineapple on pizza.

as an indoors type, if someone i love ask me to go out i will give them several reasons why i prefer staying at home.

We'll do that later. Not the pineapple on pizza but maybe something like that.

 

[AnonUnlimited]

Hmm.
I would say it depends on how well you know each other. Reason being, that would determine where to start off.

Since it happened and she is now your girlfriend I’m assuming you both know each other quite well.I’d say the aquarium is a good start because of these reasons:

1. you love it there, you can talk about something you really like.

2. You probably know them pretty well

3. You can walk and talk about things that are fun.

4. You can ask her the kind of things she likes and try to make a good guess on to where would make her happy on the second date if she doesn’t want to come out and say it.

Also check the PM.

 

[RepresentingCaution]

Picnics are nice. You can show off your cooking skills or grab takeout, and when you're done, you can wander freely.

 

[melchi]

Did you accidentally summon her? If so, perhaps go to the gun range and try shooting an AK-47.

 

[Rezcore]

I cant help you, I don't know chiraq too well and my first dates tend to start in the country.

 

[Representing_Tromba]

Did you accidentally summon her? If so, perhaps go to the gun range and try shooting an AK-47.

No. I would but she isn't into guns that much. Sadly, it may take time to convince her to consider it.

I cant help you, I don't know chiraq too well and my first dates tend to start in the country.

Well it's were all the stuff is. We live in a small town. Thank you though.

 

[WeissBlatt]

Congratulations!

 

[tiaf]

The aquarium sounds good. Even if you both don't have anything to talk about, the fishes will make the silence less awkward. I've never been to Chicago or remotely close to America, but a stroll through the city after eating in a restaurant is always nice. (Maybe Chicago has a streetfood mile for snacks/desserts?)

 

[BucatiPasta]

After 23 years, I finally got a girlfriend! However, neither of us has ever been on a date before so I need ideas. Hell, I thought I would die alone before the age of 50 so this came out of nowhere. My first thought was the aquarium since we both love that but I'm unsure. If you would be so kind as to give me some wisdom on where we should go and where to eat (preferably in Chicago), I would be much obliged.

Congratulations