I am a failure as a friend

[tiaf]

You know, eating something sweet often helps. At most he will decline, but who doesn’t want a slice of cake…or a bowl of fruit salad.

 

[Theirl]

hey men you are not the only one that done that done that myself once too, but making mistakes is what make u a better person just make sure to not commit the same mistake again and keep living no one is perfect not u not your friend...

 

[Hans.Trondheim]

I'll break my self-imposed isolation (coz I'm writing my novel) to reply to this thread.

First, there are times that just being there helps. Your friend needs someone to support him in his moment of grief, and you coming over to his place speaks a lot already about your relationship with him. Yes, we may feel inadequate at the present situation, but regardless of what you said to him, he'll appreciate the time when you are with him when he was at his worse.

Second, what you said to him is the usual words people would ask whenever they were shocked as well. And in his moment of grief, your friend may have already forgotten about it. Another related thing is, if you say you're friends with him for a long time, it's obvious that you guys already know each other. End of my point is, since you guys are together for so long, it's obvious that you mean no harm when you asked those questions.

Grief and depression are conditions that are difficult to deal with, especially if the ones affected are your friends. However, just showing that you care for their struggles is already big enough to show that you love them, and you stand by them. There's nothing much you can both do, other than let time heal the pain of loss.

What's important is that you guys stay together through thick and thin.

I'll now scoot back to my self-isolation. My condolences to his mother, and I applaud your faithfulness to your friend. In these times, there are only a few people left with that kind of virtue.

 

[Indicterra]

I'll break my self-imposed isolation (coz I'm writing my novel) to reply to this thread.

First, there are times that just being there helps. Your friend needs someone to support him in his moment of grief, and you coming over to his place speaks a lot already about your relationship with him. Yes, we may feel inadequate at the present situation, but regardless of what you said to him, he'll appreciate the time when you are with him when he was at his worse.

Second, what you said to him is the usual words people would ask whenever they were shocked as well. And in his moment of grief, your friend may have already forgotten about it. Another related thing is, if you say you're friends with him for a long time, it's obvious that you guys already know each other. End of my point is, since you guys are together for so long, it's obvious that you mean no harm when you asked those questions.

Grief and depression are conditions that are difficult to deal with, especially if the ones affected are your friends. However, just showing that you care for their struggles is already big enough to show that you love them, and you stand by them. There's nothing much you can both do, other than let time heal the pain of loss.

What's important is that you guys stay together through thick and thin.

I'll now scoot back to my self-isolation. My condolences to his mother, and I applaud your faithfulness to your friend. In these times, there are only a few people left with that kind of virtue.

I appreciate the effort, good friend

 

[3guanoff]

Over here, we often make jokes when someone important dies:

When a very good brother of mine died last year, we met up at his house. We ate, drank, joked about how he kicked the bucket. Then when we were drunker, it turned silent. His biological brother started, we all bawled our eyes out, smashed a few bottles, had a mild fight, and then the next morning I woke up on his kitchen floor.
Am I sad he passed? Extremely. But there are fond memories, they must not be tainted by the loss. So I understand your proclivity for jokes.

My advice: when it's not the right time, stay quiet.
Then when the depression went on for too long, it will be your job to drag them out of their slump with stupid jokes.

 

[Yokem]

But he said yes. ...now what do I do.


I didn't thought much of it, he was hardcore Marvel fan, I just thought it might be helpful.....fuck I knew I was insensetive

Well... who knows... he is your friend, after all. It's not like I know his likes or dislikes. Probably it could be fine. After all, it seems he likes Marvel that much. Well, anyway, good luck, and my condolences to your friend.