Humbly Requesting: Author Opinions

Thraben

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 23, 2023
Messages
248
Points
103
I have a oneshot fic (5 pages) I wrote as a lore document for a oneshot D&D session many years ago. After four years of occasionally revisiting it, adding more stuff to its ideas section, and so on, the time has come for me to write something serious on it. It is ready, and I am ready, but I want opinions. Feel free to engage with only what you have a response to.

A world that has just undergone a major upheaval, something like the Gods wiping existing civilizations and geography clean and starting over or a similar event, set a few hundred years into the 'rebuilding' phase with all the people and races vying for expansion and dominance.
A curious human hermit intent on learning both the secrets of the past and of magic, aided and opposed not only by his fellow man, but also dragons and other magical beasts.
Spellcasting? What's that, that's not possible. All magic is essentially mystical agriculture, alchemy, rituals, and divine miracle. Heavy focus to be placed on the protagonist attempting to learn why magic works, not simply learning how to do it.
Protagonist is after comprehensive knowledge of magic, something like a magical periodic table, with the altruistic goal of sharing that magic with as many people as possible putting him into conflict with burgeoning nations and their tyrants, as well as with multitudes of magical beasts and other unsavory individuals after nothing other than the power.


I am after feedback on each subject, for any obvious flaws to be addressed in the core concept or elaborations that would need to be made.


Obligatory: I have temporarily abandoned my main SH projects in favor of finally iterating and expanding on a oneshot I originally wrote as a setpiece of a D&D session because I'm two cups of tea and posable thumbs away from being a crab walking on a keyboard.
 

TheKillingAlice

Schinken
Joined
Aug 12, 2023
Messages
402
Points
103
I don't really see the reason why you would seek feedback on uncooked soup, to be honest. Maybe I'm cynical, but you never know what's actually becoming of it, because everything may sound really good or really shitty when it's still just a concept.
 

KoyukiMegumi

Kitty
Joined
Jun 11, 2021
Messages
1,201
Points
153
Well, these are just ideas. Alone they don't make up much. You have to write them into something in order to get honest feedback.
A world that has just undergone a major upheaval, something like the Gods wiping existing civilizations and geography clean and starting over or a similar event, set a few hundred years into the 'rebuilding' phase with all the people and races vying for expansion and dominance.
An apocalyptic setting can be an interesting concept, depending on what you do with it.

A curious human hermit intent on learning both the secrets of the past and of magic, aided and opposed not only by his fellow man, but also dragons and other magical beasts.
Seems your protagonist is a scholar. It can be interesting, depending on how you develop them.

Spellcasting? What's that, that's not possible. All magic is essentially mystical agriculture, alchemy, rituals, and divine miracle. Heavy focus to be placed on the protagonist attempting to learn why magic works, not simply learning how to do it.
Not much into systems, but you could do that.

Protagonist is after comprehensive knowledge of magic, something like a magical periodic table, with the altruistic goal of sharing that magic with as many people as possible putting him into conflict with burgeoning nations and their tyrants, as well as with multitudes of magical beasts and other unsavory individuals after nothing other than the power.
A protagonist whose sole goal is to acquire knowledge can be a steep hill to climb, though that's all I got from this plot. They are explorers, so make sure to build the world so they can explore it.

Your ideas are just that at the moment; there is nothing really to give feedback on. You have to do something with them in order to get some actual good advice. And the only way to do that is to write it. I wish you the best in writing, friend!
 
Top