Writing How do you sell character relationships?

[ShrimpShady]

Some of you may be familiar with my intense opinions on modern romance manga. I admit that I am prone to crashing out over fake plastic love stories made for Japanese gooners.

But believe me, at my core I love romances. That's because I love characters who bounce off each other in ways that are compelling, painful at times, but eventually satisfying. Imagine a DVD logo bouncing around a TV screen until it perfectly hits the corner. In a way, that is similar to the moment 2 characters have sex for the first time as a climax to their budding relationship. But I digress.

So what I want to hear from you good folks is...

How do you sell character relationships?

In other words, how do you convince your audience to care about your simulacra of human beings and how they relate to one another? And I don't just mean romantic relationships. I can get down with some platonic asexual tension.

Of course, I can't attest to what works for me because I don't actually have readers , but I always hold firm the idea of "We're only as different as we are similar" when it comes to writing characters. Compare and contrast, grade schooler stuff. I think this gives the characters a meaningful push and pull between one another, resulting in a more compelling story overall. After all, if your characters are just a hodgepodge of wack tropes and fetishes who don't meaningfully relate to each other, readers would understandably leave for something more compelling, like a 5 hour analysis video that's just explaining the plot of a game.

Just to give an example of what I mean, in one of the short stories I've posted on my collection "And in the End" *wink* *wink*, I tell a tale about an old cat who suddenly gets super smart and learns to talk. Her confusion surrounding human constructs and emotions is contrasted with her owner's nonchalant nature. However, where they are similar is in their anxieties about the future. The cat grapples with her collapsing identity as she gets older and smarter, while her owner's just unsure of how to deal with his cat getting really old (haha just like me, it's almost like i wrote these stories to convince myself i'll be okay when the people around me get old).

That's just an example off the top of my head, but I'd like to hear from everybody

 

[SRB]

For money (I didn't read anything past the name of the thread).

 

[ShrimpShady]

For money (I didn't read anything past the name of the thread).

You're supposed to answer "by the pound" or something

 

[Corty]

No joke, the best example is my latest chapter on my SW chapter:

Star Wars: The Age of Peace - Chapter 59 – Together | Scribble Hub

www.scribblehub.com

That's my way of doing it.

 

[ShrimpShady]

No joke, the best example is my latest chapter on my SW chapter:

Star Wars: The Age of Peace - Chapter 59 – Together | Scribble Hub

www.scribblehub.com

That's my way of doing it.

Definitely very tender

Of course, I don't have the context of the previous chapters, but I liked the restraint. I was expecting it to go full-on sexy time, but I'm glad to be wrong. The back and forth's cute too

Maybe that restraint, that patience is an important part of compelling character relationships. It's good to let things simmer for as long as they need to

 

[RepresentingWrath]

Not sure if I understood everything correctly, I will try to answer the question nonetheless. The way I sell my character relationships is through mutual interest and looks. Yes, I think being drawn to appearances is underutilized and underrepresented considering vast majority is first of all attracted to looks. While my characters are busy thinking hard about why they are attracted to each other; I, as an author, can tell to readers they are drawn to each other because of pretty faces. I think it adds tremendous amount of realism and leads to mutual interest.

 

[ShrimpShady]

mutual interest and looks

Yes please. No more miserable copy paste nerd who gets the attention of the prettiest girl in school because he's vaguely kind. Looksmatched couples are the shit.

I think exploring that physical attraction, not just going "oooh they're so pretty" every once in a while, really adds dimensions to the relationship. Makes it more believable and real.

I'm sure for a lot of people, many of their most stand-out memories with the people they love are physical. They are related to appearance

 

[RepresentingWrath]

Yes please. No more miserable copy paste nerd who gets the attention of the prettiest girl in school because he's vaguely kind. Looksmatched couples are the shit.

I think exploring that physical attraction, not just going "oooh they're so pretty" every once in a while, really adds dimensions to the relationship. Makes it more believable and real.

I'm sure for a lot of people, many of their most stand-out memories with the people they love are physical. They are related to appearance

Yep. I obviously add characters that are conveniently pretty, or a gooner bait, but I also like to show that the beauty and by extension attraction is in the eye of the beholder. I do not spam 'cute' girl with hourglass figure and long, black hair. There is even a running gag on SHF that I'm into orc mommies, which you know, part true. Another point, even if I add a tropey 'campus belle' MC won't be attracted to her, and she is there to simply highlight that MC has his own damned taste that isn't similar to countless JP, KR, and CN male MCs.

 

[Corty]

Maybe that restraint, that patience is an important part of compelling character relationships

story dependent, but yes, relationships, at least in my experience and opinion, develop over time. And they don't just happen

 

[ArcadiaBlade]

I'm still studying human psychology and tend to simulate situations which social interactions tend to bond with relationship between people.

Often, it would either start slow or fast depending on each person's interest, looks and personalities.

Boys tend to simplify things while girls often complicates one problem into a more complex knot, to the point where they can't even understand their own problem.

The main reason why even building relationship is basically just girls trying to overcomplicate things that romance options between opposite sex or lesbians are just women in general.

Now, I'm not sexist but most of RL situations I often watch and read are basically girls are just complex that Gay relationships are the simplest form of love and lesbian relationship are the most complex.

Gay relationship is like a simple yet fun game that everyone judge it to be a bad game. Made by an indie with passion but hated because of the developer is a Pedo which is a misunderstanding but no one believes him.

Lesbian relationship is like a 3A game thats heavily filled with inflated fame but when you play the game, its basically so complex and toxic that you wanna give it a terrible review but afraid of being cancelled on the internet.

 

[Puji-Maki]

Through online.

 

[CharlesEBrown]

Very carefully, as selling "relationships" is illegal in some places...

Seriously, though, try to make the characters feel as "real" as possible - do that, and the relationships will either BE forced or feel real. At least, IMO.

And, as in the real world, looks will play a part in it, but in the same way a synopsis and cover can sell or kill a novel - you need something to draw the potential partner (and yes, a book is a relationship with the reader and the author) - be it looks, common interests, or even word of mouth (Hey, this one is perfect for you!). That is what gets the ball rolling, but for it to be more than a superficial, fake relationship, there has to be SOMETHING beneath that surface.

 

[Zagaroth]

Well, there's a lot of relationships in my story, and I seem to have sold them all. At least, according to reader feedback.

Anyway, first things first. Your characters need to be people. Good character writing 101. Now, they have to be people who would be attracted to each other in some way. And it does not have to start remotely romantic, so long as it could build to something romantic.

I have a thruple that was built out of circumstance as much as anything, but the characters were compatible enough to let proximity and sincere attempts to make things work was enough to go from there. Good communication is important.

Moriko and Mordecai started off with simple physicality and convenience (with her initiating), but then a layer was added on as they needed each other to get out of their circumstances. Life and death struggle together, if an unusual one. A bond is formed, but it isn't exactly romance at this point.

This lands them with Kazue. Sweet, cheerful, hyperactive kitsune and former shrine maiden who has been stuck all alone for 2 weeks (which is torture for someone like her.) Her circumstances make an opportunity for everyone to benefit, but it's going to entangle them in ways that are not going to be easily separated.

And the 20 yo maiden with a stash of *dirty* romance books back home is desperately trying to not think too hard about just how 'helpless' she'd be in the hands of these two people, especially with Mordecai acting as her teacher for a brand new magical skill set she'd recently acquired. Oh no, that would just be awful if they had to spend a lot of time in close proximity. Anything could happen... (Girl has issues with wandering thoughts. Turns out, I'd given her ADHD with traits pulled from both me and my wife.)

So, mutual attraction is set, but there are some initial power/dynamic imbalances with Kazue that Mordecai and Moriko are extremely careful about. And they honestly communicate with Kazue about those issues. Attraction, honesty, earned trust, continual interaction over days with no one else around, and you have the foundation for romantic feelings to build on top of simple desire and pleasure.

Romantic feelings deepen over time from there, in large part because everyone decides to try to make things work.

Geeze, I keep trying to trim down and then I add more. Um, if you want to see it in detail, first six chapters of "No Need For A Core?" for the initial setup. Shutting up now.

 

[HisDivineShadow]

Looks do matter, but only for the first impression. After that, either the interest grows or disappears, and good looks stop being important, like wearing an uncomfortable outfit. It might look nice, but honestly just let it stay in the closet.
That’s why building everything around appearance doesn’t interest me. Right now, I care more about writing the way people connect. I just realized I almost haven’t described what my characters look like, even though I can see them clearly in my head. I’ll fix that later. One day.

 

[ConansWitchBaby]

By showing physical contact as an afterthought. Like randomly having one laze on top of the other. As much as people like writing the "romantic" parts, they kind of skip the little build-ups that turn into everyday happenstance.

For lesbians though: fist fights.

 

[Deleted member 84247]

My vampire lady thought dragon lady is hot, and dragon lady thought vampire lady is hot. Dragon lady want to kidnap vampire lady for her hoard, and vampire lady is easily conquered. So dragon lady took the little apple to herself.

I don't actually think about why character relationships sell or not while I'm writing them, tbh. I just make personalities, and let the characters do the work for me.

 

[BearlyAlive]

Forced proximity, brutal banter, and/or political maneuvering. For my story I try to write what I actually know, so if you ever watched classic stuff like Tom & Jerry, or Looney Tunes, that's the kind of vibes my friend groups will usually have.

 

[Thraben]

To the highest bidder

 

[Succubiome]

more process-focused, but:

====
simulate two people with different personalities and emotions
come up with a starting relationship and feelings towards each other, simple or complex

Chorus
(put them in a situation
see how they interact)

repeat Chorus as long as you find it interesting to do so
====

plot can be a great source of Situation To Put Them In
so as long as you keep thinking of how they'd interact
it's pretty easy to weave into anything else
but sometimes how they interact can create new situations in themselves, too

you can also do Slice of Life type stuff by putting them into incredibly mundane situations

you can hook people, yourself and/or the audience, in with specific dynamics or personalities or tropes
but in the long run, I think it's going to be the subtle shifting of relationship and feelings as things change that's interesting
getting to see them in new situations

TL;DR: character development is how you sell it

 

[ShrimpShady]

Gay relationship is like a simple yet fun game that everyone judge it to be a bad game. Made by an indie with passion but hated because of the developer is a Pedo which is a misunderstanding but no one believes him.

Lesbian relationship is like a 3A game thats heavily filled with inflated fame but when you play the game, its basically so complex and toxic that you wanna give it a terrible review but afraid of being cancelled on the internet.

As a straight man, I cannot comment, but definitely food for thought

Seriously, though, try to make the characters feel as "real" as possible - do that, and the relationships will either BE forced or feel real. At least, IMO.

Realism's always an interesting point when it comes to writing characters. The thing is, I don't think most readers really want super real characters, they want characters who have enough depth to them, but also won't have you tear your hair out like actual people can do when you get to know them.

Some people can't even handle Shinji Ikari, and I consider him super real

This leads me to believe that people want an abridged version of realness when it comes to characters. They want characters who are flawed, but capable enough to resolve their issues after their first or second big character moment.

I just realized I almost haven’t described what my characters look like, even though I can see them clearly in my head. I’ll fix that later. One day.

Happens to the best of us

By showing physical contact as an afterthought. Like randomly having one laze on top of the other. As much as people like writing the "romantic" parts, they kind of skip the little build-ups that turn into everyday happenstance.

This. So much this. Absolutely this. I'm sounding like a millennial with how much this I am proclaiming this is.

One of my favorite romance manga, Insomniacs After School, does a lot of work to gradually build the romance between the main characters. It starts out as purely platonic, but you start seeing their body language and the way they act around each other change as their feelings become more romantic.