Gone

[Cookiez_N_Potionz]

No Description

 

[LoneQuack]

Okay, here's an important question: Is there a White Lullaby City?

 

[Anonjohn20]

He's heard of "old new york", but has he heard of "new old new york," or even "old new old new york?"

 

[TheKillingAlice]

Well, I chose the color black based off auras. Each color has a bunch of meaning & the color black can mean mysterious, protection, evil, strength, and elegance.

I haven't even read it, but I can already tell you that won't fly. Like, if you have to assign traits to an aura, it shouldn't be something as stupid as "Mysterious".
Stupid sounds harsh? Well, it isn't. "Mysterious" is not a trait, it describes the absence of specific traits to put your finger on and thus, not knowing what to expect, and seeing that in itself as positive secrecy that creates an interest. So it's not just "not a trait", but a subjective perception of something or someone.
Next is the random assortment of traits, leaving the "Mysterious" out of the bunch entirely. You put together positive traits, like Protection into one slot with Evil. How that doesn't work, I shouldn't even have to explain.
Evil and Elegance can go together, but Evil and Strength don't. Because even if Evil happens to be strong, it shouldn't be narratively associated with Strength, because Evil usually means to not be strong, as you have surrendered to evil because you weren't strong enough to do whatever you wanted to accomplish on the right side of things. Evil is a very specific word, already leaving no interpretation open, it means Evil. You can be a lot of things that are seen as evil, yet maybe you aren't evil, but if you are already marked with literal evil, you are basically Dr. Drakken, so what's the point trying to make it sound positive to have a black aura with the other traits which have a mostly positive connotation?
Strength, for example, is a thing fitting for Green or Red. Protection I would consider Green or White. You can do it however you want, but here you assigned them so randomly, I can only assume you needed to have those traits in at least one specific character and didn't want to take the extra mile to do it differently.

 

[RileyMarino]

Well, I liked the way the first line and the first couple of paragraphs grabbed the reader.

Then it got a little hazy, and I was less sure where we were or what was happening. I assume the class was being held outside, but some descriptions of the setting would be useful to help the reader. Overall, I feel the chapter is too short, rather abrupt, and leans heavily into the 'tell' part of 'show don't tell'. I think if you explained a bit more about the setting and the characters, it would flow better and be more engaging.

Hope that helps.