Drifting Friendships

[RootBeerBert]

F

Unless you and your childhood friends all spend your lives in one place, you will face this.
Growing up in a mobile, modern world, it seems inevitable.
So, what to do?

(1) Get used to it. Become a lone wolf.
(2) Move on. Make new friends wherever you go.
(3) Marry someone you can stick with, whatever happens.
(4) Make friends on the internet.

Even as an introvert, I cannot recommend (1).
In my case, (3) works well enough, with a little of (2).
Has anybody found that (4) really works?

(2) and (4) sound like the only viable options for me, since I’ve been doing (1) most of my life and it sucks ass and (3) is way too difficult for me.

Procreate, and then you can make friends with the parents of your kid's friends.

Its gonna be a while before I get there...

 

[RavenRunes]

That's why we write. So we can keep our imaginary (and therefore perfect) friends with us forever.

I think it gets harder to make friends as you get older. I used to have a large bunch of people I was out with every weekend, all of us being footloose and fancy free as it were. Then we got old and had kids and life suddenly wasn't like that, and by the time your bairn's old enough for you to go out again, you've forgotten how to talk to people.

His friends' parents are nice enough but we have nothing in common. Can't do more than make five mins small talk with them. The child free friend I have has mobility issues and lives 30 miles away, the other friend has two kids younger than mine. I have an old fart for a best friend 150 miles away, another friend 200 miles away. My boyfriend also has no friends nearby or in good health.

I joined a writing group but again, all perfectly insane people I have nothing in common with beyond the writing. By that I mean I'd hate their nights out and they'd hate mine.

I used to live within spitting distance of several friends and we'd all just wander around each other's houses or meet on the hippy green in town. Great days. Some fucked up shit too, but you get that. Mostly good memories though. It was great for an introvert like me as it meant I could go or not, and nothing was expected of me; if you have to make a big mission to see one friend it gets a bit much.

 

[ThrillingHuman]

For a story that I am going to write, I wrote this in my notes

"Peace is within yourself. Not anywhere else.
Happiness is within yourself. Not anywhere else.
It may be like a dying ember buried inside your heart, or it may be like a smouldering coal, or even a burning fire. It is there.
You ought to take of it, nurture it, warm it it so it becomes like a bright and hot flame, and it will naturally radiate off of you and others shall share in your happiness and find theirs.
Should you make your happiness like a strong flame, you will never feel cold or lonely no matter how harsh the winter may be"

I hope it will help you

 

[owotrucked]

Get right with God. Even if you have friends you will either die an early death, drift apart, or live to see them all die. Life is about suffering.

Unfathomably based

 

[Seaspecter]

I’m beginning to wonder what I’m going to about friends in the future. My friends and I are going to drift away at some point, we probably are right now. I used to think it’d be fine since I had a best friend who I definitely wouldn’t drift from, but looking back I didn’t. I’d mistaken my closest friend for my best friend, not realizing I valued his friendship much more than he did mine. In spite of being socially inept I do like hanging out with friends on the rare occasion it’s possible, but when the drift is complete and I don’t have any friends, what am I gonna do?

I don't have a single friend from my childhood left I don't even remember their names or faces at this point but I still have friends you make new ones along the way so don't worry about it it'll be fine.