Demi human questions

[scribesaga]

So i've been going back and forth on whether i should go 'all-in' with some of my Demi-human stories, or maybe pull back a bit.

let me explain

I had this idea a while ago, and i've written over a 100k words between two drafts. the idea was a young kid discovers a young succubus and takes her in, then ten years later they would meet again as adults. it would be a childhood friends reunite as adults kind of story. the setting was a fantasy world, then i turned it into more of a science fiction world. THe thing is, originally, the succubus wasn't really a succubus. rather than go 'all-in' with succubi, lamia, and other monster girls, there would be demi-humans that were basically human, but with minor deviant characteristics. They weren't bound to fantasy rules where cubi are a bit more risque (to say the least). The idea was basically that demi's aren't much different than normal humans, but they were prejudiced against because of their physical differences. I even had cool names for each of the demi-human races. For succubi, i thought the term Redever would be cool.

Anyway, not a lot of people read the story as i was writing it, and eventually i just kinda gave up and started again.

In my second draft "love in the last city" i made the demi-humans full monster girl. Redevers were now just succubi, and demi's were more of what you would expect in a typical fantasy setting. This made things a little easier to manage, and sometimes added some spice to the story, but at the same time I wasn't sure if it was the best choice. It did make it easier to explain the magic system, as Demi's had a natural affinity for magic compared to typical humans, and readers understood what they were getting whenever introduced to a new character.

Overall, i'm split. I can't decide if i liked it better to have Demi's be more human and divorce them from the stereotypical characteristics you would get in a typical fantasy or keep them as they are now.

Anyway, i've been bugged by this for days now, and i just thought i would reach out for feedback to see what some other writers thought.

thank you.

 

[PancakesWitch]

Just do both? Start as a traditional fantasy with the races being like everyone knows them and slowly reveal their true origins as descendants of genetically modified humans or humans that somehow mutated into that (you have to give an actual reason, not just say "ummm, they were humans too ok?"). It could be that they're the result of aliens, ancient human civilizations, or whatever.
I did that with one of my stories, where the Gods are later revealed to be humans from Earth that elevated themselves through the discovery of Magic and Mana, but ended dooming their own planet through their experiments (opening an interdimensional portal where corrupted source of energy mutated the entire world and its life into literal hell and demons) and all the fantasy races were genetically modified humans, not beings that originated on their own, except for the original inhabitants of this planet the gods terraformed, which are called "demons" and are the only actual aliens.

 

[scribesaga]

i mean i could start it with everyone being referred to their non-traditional names and terms, and then later in the story reflect their origins. but won't that confuse the reader?

 

[CharlesEBrown]

This sounds kind of like how the manga turned webnovel turned audionovel "My Vampire System" went - all the "monster" and "demi-human" types were either bioengineered humans, humans modified by powerful Systems, or offshoots of the Vampires. Some were very close to the (stereo)typical monster/demihuman descriptions from fantasy and sci-fi, others were significantly different.

 

[scribesaga]

to be clear, i don't want them to be bio-engineered humans. its not a bad idea, but i wanted the demi's to be very much part of the world from the beginning. i was just weighing whether they should be traditional monster types (succubi, lamia, werewolves, vampire, etc) or be much more human with minor characteristics hinting at a monster origin. They wouldn't even behave like the stereotypical monster type, they would act and behave like humans with only minor physical differences. Maybe when they awaken magic, things would change, and parts of their darker origins would manifest.

 

[Clo]

I would choose the one that helps you tell the story you want to get out?

Don't look at them being human or demi-human at face value. Think of what it means.

Are you speaking of racism and profiling of minorities? Racism? Sexual Identity or Preferences?

The more you make your demi-human appear "obviously" non-human, the more you story talks of obvious profiling, like skin colour.

The harder they are to distinguish from humans, the more your story talks of topics like identity, sexuality, neurodiversity, invisible disabilities.

Really, you need to know what your story's end is about. Is it about the demi overthrowing humanity? Is it about them managing to carve out some place they belong? Is it not about any of this, but just the story of one such demo, victim of prejudice, and how it eventually ruins him/her?

A story about demi-humans isn't a story about demi-humans. It's a story about prejudice.

 

[scribesaga]

i wasn't trying to write a story about racism or prejudice, but it does exist in the world.

 

[LiteraryWho]

i wasn't trying to write a story about racism or prejudice, but it does exist in the world.

Clo is correct, but cringe. Every element in your story exists to support what you're trying to say with it. That's not to say you have to be regurgitating cliches about Current Thing™ (eg. racism, sexism, etc.), but you should still have some underlying point you're trying to make, even if it's something as simple as "cat-girls are cute" or "I wish I knew a succubus."

Basically, don't think of what your demi-humans are in terms of "should", but rather ask yourself, "what do they need to be to say what I want to say about them?" It's entirely possible the answer to that is "nothing at all" (e.g. the move Groundhog's Day never reveals why the MC is caught in a time loop, and just focuses on how it affects him), in which case, you don't need to fret about how human they really are.

I will add though that, "Monsters are all really human after all" has been done to death at this point, so you might instead find it more enjoyable to focus instead making them be actually not really human at all. I, at least, always find stories more interesting when they go beyond my expectations, rather than when they conform to them.

 

[CharlesEBrown]

I will add though that, "Monsters are all really human after all" has been done to death at this point, so you might instead find it more enjoyable to focus instead making them be actually not really human at all. I, at least, always find stories more interesting when they go beyond my expectations, rather than when they conform to them.

And the Clive Barker version: "Yes there are monsters, but we are worse" has also been done to (maybe un?)death too, IMO.

 

[Clo]

i wasn't trying to write a story about racism or prejudice, but it does exist in the world.

Even if you never ever bring it up.

If you have a succubus, just there, being a party member, and nobody takes issues about that? You're making a statement, whether you set out do so or not.

In the imaginary case above it could be as simple as: "See? She is in the party, nobody takes issue with it, or even mentions it."

But that's normalising her presence. You're telling your readers you don't think it's a big deal to have a succubus as a friend; your protag grew up knowing one, and she's still a friend.

This is still a story making a statement! One that is full of hope, or free of sterotypes or prejudice.

 

[LiteraryWho]

And the Clive Barker version: "Yes there are monsters, but we are worse" has also been done to (maybe un?)death too, IMO.

So true. I miss stories where monsters are just monsters. They are way more interesting that way. In fact, I just remembered a really good one I read where the vampires were alien parasites (Necroscope, specifically the second one, Wamphyri (though I think they featured in all of them, I just only ever read part 2). They were all pretty much evil, but man were they fascinating.

 

[beast_regards]

The "demi-humans" are a "fantasy race"

... well, technically, species and not a race, but mileage may vary as they could actually interbreed...

... which could mean everyone is descended from dragons, because dragons are compatible with everyone...

Nevermind.

Back to the point.

The "demi-humans" are a fantasy race (species). They are, mechanically speaking, not all that different from elves, or dwarfs, or orcs, and the way ho to portray them or how they work mechanically (or meta-physically) is entirely up to you as the author.

There are no limits, and no conventions. They are not bound to any definition other than yours. There is, in fact, not an established definition of elf either, and if there is, that expression is most likely copyrighted, so feel free to find your own definition for anything you write including elves, dragons, succubi, dwarfs, catgirls and whatever you like.

If you say that "demi-humans" are closely related to humans, and are called this way because they are actually related, it's a completely valid piece of world-building.

 

[scribesaga]

The "demi-humans" are a "fantasy race"

... well, technically, species and not a race, but mileage may vary as they could actually interbreed...

... which could mean everyone is descended from dragons, because dragons are compatible with everyone...

Nevermind.

Back to the point.

The "demi-humans" are a fantasy race (species). They are, mechanically speaking, not all that different from elves, or dwarfs, or orcs, and the way ho to portray them or how they work mechanically (or meta-physically) is entirely up to you as the author.

There are no limits, and no conventions. They are not bound to any definition other than yours. There is, in fact, not an established definition of elf either, and if there is, that expression is most likely copyrighted, so feel free to find your own definition for anything you write including elves, dragons, succubi, dwarfs, catgirls and whatever you like.

If you say that "demi-humans" are closely related to humans, and are called this way because they are actually related, it's a completely valid piece of world-building.

should i even refer them as "demi-humans"? i mean, is there a better term for other species that are humanoid but not human? thinking of general terms, or maybe that's a little unfair.

 

[beast_regards]

should i even refer them as "demi-humans"? i mean, is there a better term for other species that are humanoid but not human? thinking of general terms, or maybe that's a little unfair.

The "demi" means "partial"

The "demi" humans are "partially human".

Considering this is a very vague fantasy term, it could have a lot of meanings, and the conventional, i.e. Tolkien inspired (and copyrighted) elves and dwarves could be plausibly called "demi-humans" and in some settings, it is indeed the case. For example, in Witcher universe, the elves (which are pointy eared human like species) are called "demi-humans".

What it means in your universe is entirely up to you.

But are your "demi-humans" indeed partially human? Or what it is supposed to mean in your universe? What are they, and how they come to be?

It's a very broad term, without any reasonable definition to agree on, so you are not tied to one meaning or another.

In extreme cases, you could still have species which aren't really resembling humans from our Earth calling themselves human in universe (even if it would be mind-bend for audience)