Chain Story

[CharlesEBrown]

But after the first dead thing crawled from its grave, another followed... and another... and they kept coming, until a distant, divine voice cried: "You IDIOT. Never cast that spell while listening to Oingo Boingo's 'Dead Man's Party' - have I taught you NOTHING? Last time I buy an apprentice on Temu..."

 

[Juia_Darkcrest]

Richard ran up the stairs to the second story of the dilapidated building, searching for anything to block the stairs with from the incoming wave of undead...or to come down from his acid laced mushroom trip. Either way, it was better to be safe than a sampler menu for the hoard.

 

[blackcrowcrowd]

Richard finally reached the second story. Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be anything that can block an undead on the corridor. However, it seems that there are several rooms in here...

 

[Our_Lady_in_Twilight]

He ran into the first room, stopped short as he caught sight of the old hag in her decrepit bridal gown. "The agony is exquisite, don't you think?" the woman croaked, leering at him through broken yellow teeth, "to live on forever with a broken heart?"

 

[Worthy39]

He grimaced at the sight of her, deciding to check a different room. In the second room, he found a bunch of severed heads... of cabbage.

 

[LewisBerneu]

...Upon which a swarm, literally thousands, of Cabbage White butterflies were feeding ... when they spotted a new head appear in the room, they swooped towards it...

 

[Juia_Darkcrest]

"These damn Mushrooms!" He shouted, the fear of the butterfly's giving him another moment of lucidly. He grabbed a nearby curtain and started swinging at the swarm of bugs, determined to stand his ground against the menace, or die in an epic battle.

 

[Our_Lady_in_Twilight]

He fell to the ground, felt the acrid taste of blood in his mouth. Was it the end? As the darkness crept closer, he remembered the last advice of his mentor, the great wizard.

"Should you ever find yourself trapped in a musty old room with a hundred cabbage-white butterflies..."

He pawed desperately at his scrambled thoughts, grasping to hold that memory, else all was lost. What exactly had the old man said?

 

[bulmabriefs144]

Right, it was the words, "Undo the absence that threatens to remove me. Negate all void that does not exist. Dispel illusion! " The old man had claimed to be a wizard. Though he had taught very few spells, and all that he told him had never been demonstrated, as it was situational. So no fire spells or anything.
Indeed, these oxymoronic words promised to banish anything he saw that wasn't real, though whatever was here that was left, he would have to deal with himself. The good news? His head no longer felt quite so fuzzy. The bad news? Well...

 

[Juia_Darkcrest]

"BEEEEEESSSSS!!! WHY ARE THERE BEES!!!!" He shouted, the illusion dispelled. A swarm of bees surrounded him, the house he once was in disappeared, leaving him in the forest, holding a branch he was beating a large nest with.

 

[bulmabriefs144]

The next day, he awoke in a bed in a tent. A friendly face stared back at him. "You're lucky I was camping out here. My knowledge of herbs kinda sorta made your face purple and yellow, but my healing magic numbed the pain. You'll need to rest until the swelling goes down. I'm an amateur in folk healing, but even so, I do not recommend treating multiple sclerosis with the venom of 20 or more live bees," the woman said.
( https://www.webmd.com/vitamins/ai/ingredientmono-972/bee-venom )
"That was what you were trying to do, right?"

 

[CharlesEBrown]

Shyly, and with great difficulty due to the swelling, he replied, "No, actually I was trying to cure myself of the delusion of being two hairdressers named St. Tufnell, but that's not too different from Multiple Sclerosis, now that I think about it..."

 

[Wenlock]

"By the way," the woman turned to him with a sheepish grin. " Your four children have been bawling their eyes out ever since that night. They say that their other four siblings have been kidnapped by the undead?"

Richard's mouth gaped like a pufferfish as he struggled to clarify that he was single and childless but he soon heard the loud cries of those children coming closer and closer...

"Dick!"

"...father. call him father." the other children whispered amongst themselves.

 

[JayMark]

The children held hands while forming a circle around Richard, "Dady shark, dododododo! Grandpa shark dododododo! Grandma shark dododododo! Baby shark, dodododododo!"

Richard found himself worried because their was no mention of mommy shark.

 

[Our_Lady_in_Twilight]

Then, somehow, Palpatine returned...

 

[CharlesEBrown]

Then, somehow, Palpatine returned...

...the video he checked out in 1998, at the Last Blockbuster in New Jersey.

 

[bulmabriefs144]

Anyway, regardless of what Palpatine did or did not do in 1998, The Rise of Skywalker was reportedly a terrible film, so we must never mention him again.

The kids however were a very much present issue, that occupied all of his thoughts, "Who was the mother? Why don't I remember four kids? Could I have been hallucinating that long or did I have a complete mental breakdown? Were these really my kids? Or were they con artists, alien replicants, robots, or some other falsehood? There are four others taken by undead? Wait, the undead were real?" Richard muttered these and other thoughts aloud, visibly worrying the woman, while the kids all nodded like they had seen this muttering before.

https://media1.tenor.com/m/4yZhXL5WyGMAAAAd/deku-mutter-mha.gif

 

[bulmabriefs144]

(Darn, I killed it)

 

[LeilaniOtter]

Anyway, regardless of what Palpatine did or did not do in 1998, The Rise of Skywalker was reportedly a terrible film, so we must never mention him again.

The kids however were a very much present issue, that occupied all of his thoughts, "Who was the mother? Why don't I remember four kids? Could I have been hallucinating that long or did I have a complete mental breakdown? Were these really my kids? Or were they con artists, alien replicants, robots, or some other falsehood? There are four others taken by undead? Wait, the undead were real?" Richard muttered these and other thoughts aloud, visibly worrying the woman, while the kids all nodded like they had seen this muttering before.

https://media1.tenor.com/m/4yZhXL5WyGMAAAAd/deku-mutter-mha.gif

One of the children looked up at her mother gravely and pursed her lips together before uttering softly, tears in her eyes, "He needs to wake up, Mommy..."

 

[bulmabriefs144]

"Huh?" Richard said. "I'm wide awake."