A proper cutaway

CrimsonGenius

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I had someone tell my story had a movie esque cutaway where the next section had two paragraphs before a new cutaway transition to the next 'scene'. It was a bad thing for them, what I want to know is how you would write a proper cutaway.
 

Raymann

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Tempokai

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Like this:




1693141296344.png


or just
***
is enough
 

bulmabriefs144

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I had someone tell my story had a movie esque cutaway where the next section had two paragraphs before a new cutaway transition to the next 'scene'. It was a bad thing for them, what I want to know is how you would write a proper cutaway.
"They kissed, and the scene faded to black. (The next day/elsewhere/etc)..."

Like that. You literally just dictate a fadeout in text, like a movie would show in action.

Or yeah, use a line separator. But that doesn't really dictate how the scene fades out. You could also insert a fade to black picture.
 

Succubiome

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I had someone tell my story had a movie esque cutaway where the next section had two paragraphs before a new cutaway transition to the next 'scene'. It was a bad thing for them, what I want to know is how you would write a proper cutaway.
Maybe post the example?

I will say: no matter what you write, it is always going to be a bad thing for someone.
 

CrimsonGenius

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Maybe post the example?

I will say: no matter what you write, it is always going to be a bad thing for someone.
I have changed it by adding their location after each cutaway, but it's this.

He shrugged as he followed her. He had to admit he tended to daydream a lot, but sometimes he wondered if this life was all there is. Hopefully exploring their new home would take his mind off things.



A woman stood on the tallest building of the city. She had on a bright pink dress, matching colored flats, and a pink umbrella that concealed her face. A smile formed on her lip as she took in the view of Parkerville.

"Much has changed in the past 300 years. People have evolved, but… people haven't changed… there is still corruption." She giggled. "Oh, this is going to be fun."



Jake and Tina came across a plaza near their neighborhood. After they arrived, they stumbled upon a restaurant, with outdoor scenery, called the Hotspot. The place looked lively with teens hanging around since school was out for the summer. Jake looked around, feeling nostalgic about what for his old city.
 

dummycake

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I have changed it by adding their location after each cutaway, but it's this.

He shrugged as he followed her. He had to admit he tended to daydream a lot, but sometimes he wondered if this life was all there is. Hopefully exploring their new home would take his mind off things.



A woman stood on the tallest building of the city. She had on a bright pink dress, matching colored flats, and a pink umbrella that concealed her face. A smile formed on her lip as she took in the view of Parkerville.

"Much has changed in the past 300 years. People have evolved, but… people haven't changed… there is still corruption." She giggled. "Oh, this is going to be fun."




Jake and Tina came across a plaza near their neighborhood. After they arrived, they stumbled upon a restaurant, with outdoor scenery, called the Hotspot. The place looked lively with teens hanging around since school was out for the summer. Jake looked around, feeling nostalgic about what for his old city.
that is perfectly fine lol
 

Representing_Tromba

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Make the cutaway somewhat related to the past scene. For example, a classic go-to would be to have a character make a reference to a character being in danger or trouble so that when you cutaway to the next scene, you can have the character that was referenced instantly say that they are in danger or trouble in a mocking/funny manner. As long as the cutaway has some relation to the past scene then it can be done in a smooth manner.
 

CrimsonGenius

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I posted the story on Royal Road, and that is one of things they had a problem with.
 

MintiLime

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These are all great suggestions. I just chop off the chapter, end it there, and throw the next scene into a new chapter lol
 
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