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I find the fact you don’t have any backups at all besides whats posted extremely suspicious. You didn’t save one anywhere else?

The mouse isn’t as trigger happy as say the Japanese company that shall not be named that owns the IP for the red plumber the boy in the green tunic and the monster fighting game, but I would say unless it’s a fan fiction where you’re writing a fan fiction about Star Wars you should be fine...

Dolores Umbridge is definitely up there. She’s evil but not kill babies evil. She’s institutional evil the evil that exists because of bureaucracy and sycophancy. There’s Joker for the pure psychopathy. But there’s also guys like Hannibal Lector, Norman Bates from Psycho, or Patrick Bateman...

Write out your plot line in bulleted points try to clump them together into logical groups.

“Eyes are the windows to the soul.” Yakusu is right. Take your MC’s character traits do a deep dive on what colors mean in various cultures and throughout history and match what your MC is like characterwise to the colors. Just two is limiting but you can use light from the environment to change...

Blue and gray

Honestly I think complaints about passive/active voice are bullish!t. I’ve been told by teachers and professors for years that I write in the passive voice too much but I don’t see the difference.

Okay first off you need to change the name of the world. Avalorn? Seriously? I tried to type it in and autocorrect automatically changed it to Avalon. You know that mystical realm related to the King Arthur myth? You added a single letter. Very Original. Alaric is okay and falls into the...

Honestly not a bad idea but the not remembering anything is kinda a deal breaker. It could also be horror with someone remembering everything just imagine dozens or hundreds of years of collective memory. It could drive anybody insane. Unless it’s only a short story, I don’t think the not...

Not an author just a long time reader so my opinion might not hold the same weight. In my experience people who post more than one story at a time fall into a couple categories. One either they are a very talented writer who successfully writes multiple stories and keeps them updated reliably...

Then I’d take a look at your writing before posting or get a proofreader or editor to read your stuff before posting it.

According to the internet the upper middle and lower dantian already exist in the bodies as the vessels which essence is taken and turned into qi. So maybe your lore can start with everyone having only one as an excuse to make one? I will say that in most wuxia manwha there’s only one dantian at...

Honestly it looks great ?

I know some authors do commissions for some of their tiers like writing little side chapters from other characters perspectives that don’t necessarily impact the plot as a whole but can expand the lore of the world. It could help challenge you to expand the scope of your story or it might be...

Most long term users, which is where your more dedicated fan base will pull from, have a policy of not latching onto stories that are below the 50 chapter mark. So don’t be too discouraged that your writing isnt getting a ton of traction in the early game. Ask your readers to like and review...

I’d want mine to be easily portable but also not so small I’d lose it. Maybe one of those knives with the knuckle duster handles? Maybe a Kodachi or katana if I have to go bigger.

Yeah I’m going to question your choices. I voted for option A just because I don’t like Shinji and frankly, I have to question your sanity that he’s one of the choices. I mean all the characters in all of anime and you pick Shinji from neon Genesis evangelion? ?

I would say first thought is the main character. Of course you have to start with a hero then you have to do plot. I mean both are important but I’d think most would come up with a character then, have ideas about plot. One reinforces the other. I would say most important is plot, but if you...

Milf is a fetish for a reason. Though I will say sugar mama would probably work more in the long term than dommy momma. If a person has been emotionally and mentally abused by someone that was supposed to take care of them they aren’t going to turn to a dominant for affection and intimacy. Well...

More details. Some more foreshadowing. Names. If you’ve got any books with blurbs in the back or book jackets try looking at them for inspiration.