The one above me has a talking sock puppet name Fred that can teleport him to Magical Girl Fantasy Land but he never uses its power. [Disclaimer: All Magical Girls Are Over The Age of 18 and none of them are futa.]
Soon your fridge will require a subscription service to be a able to open the door.
What, you want toast this morning? You forgot to update the toaster. You want to toast wheat bread? That's and additional five units a month.