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Oh.....Now i understand (after i wrote it). I have big enormous jiffy about "injustice". (top1 of my hates) And well. The fact pangmingda ignore me, despite not deserving it, kinda is, in my own oppinion, "unfair". So yeah............? im sad. (not angry)

And well, the painting neighbor, suddenly put a giant wall between them, and stop talking to them, even ignoring them as air. Humming happily the next day. And joking with other neighbors (further away). How would you feel as the ignored person ? Its this unwarranted ignoring that is...

> Analogy time Its like, imagine you paint your house in pink fushua. Is it "problematic" to the eyes of neighbor ? Yes. Do they dislike it ? Yes. Is it annoying ? Yes. So they verbally say its meh, they dislike it, hoping they switch it. With cordial vocabulary. Knowing its their choice to...

Well, that is the thing. I didnt really do anything wrong, nor there is anything to apologize. (and also why it piss me off so much) (well, not really the correct wording but i can't find a better fitting one that is more mild)

Very sorry for rambling. That is how bad i am currently. I feel bad for bothering you. ? = my face. Thank you. ?

And well, doesnt help, that after ignoring me she post : I hope my day is better (as if im the one that made her day terrible yesterday) (ignoring my post RIGHT UNDER it) (i feel like a piece of shit that dont deserve to appear in her sight) And it hit my ptsd of a certain Para21 drama...

I also want to be friend with pangmingda. I also want to be friend with everyone. Im like the trope of childish character that goes : When i enter school i want to have 100 friends ! Sadly im too honest, too unlucky too. Again, i should have stfu-ed myself.

It still feel horribly bad, to be "ignored/muted". In fact, im guessing it hit my PTSD sore point, that in the past no one care about me, while the "popular one" is fine and continue with their life. Everyone siding with the popular one. (AliceShiki) Its not as in the past, but like usual the...

You sure know me well. Indeed i do. I have this wrenching gut feeling of remorse bc someone dislike me (for no reason/misunderstand me). AND combo with remorse that i had a fight with botty (sequels). So right now, i try to be positive but truth is im down bad.