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I know some day the weight of my deeds shall catch up with me. The old lady Justice will, with her trembling frail hands, pick me up, examine my body of work with her myopic eyes and find my actions too outrageous to be forgiven, too incomprehensible to be understood, too disgusting to be pitied...

All my life I knew that I could only ever be a monster, and I could not be anything else. The warmth of blood and its steady pulsations underneath my skin were just like the patterns on a bug's shell that allowed it to mix with the foliage, if you cut me open, you would, as I know for sure, only...

Please forgive me. Please do not forgive me. Please condemn me and hate me for I deserve no less than the deepest hatred and condemnation by everybody and everything and I deserve no forgiveness for what I am and what I have done.

These thoughts in my head, they push against my skull and try to escape into this world outside... They are the most horrible thoughts in the world and they drive me to do the most awful and despicable things.

I am sorry. It would be better for me to die and to disappear forever from this world and not dirty it with my presence... I know it would be. But I can never do it. I am a coward. I'm a monster.

Because we are too leet for dat