BenJepheneT

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 20, 2023

I sometimes wake up in mild sweat remembering that any competent college chemistry professor just casually carries the general recipe to methamphetamine in their heads wherever they go like a fanny pack or their wallets, but it's instead the literal instructions to committing class B felony

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 19, 2023

I've started working 3 jobs a week. It's tiring but I haven't seen this many digits in my bank account since... ever, to be honest.

I'm thinking of purchasing an AK-47 gel blaster which I intend to paint matte black with red go-faster stripes. I'll see y'all in a few weeks.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 17, 2023

I got a new job after I was laid off from my last two (both company/tuition centre collapsed). I'm now working as a promoter at a dead end stall in a dying mall. Doesn't pay as much, but now I'm literally in charge of squatting at a desk for 12 hours a day and dealing with 1-2 inquiries AT MOST. I can literally draw/game on the job and still get paid by the end of the week. Why I didn't start sooner, I have no idea.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 16, 2023

i was invited to a discord roast battle where i told a black guy that "if you were the one that fell into harambe's enclosure, they would've shot the right ape."

i wasn't invited back since.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 15, 2023

>make a movie in 2009
>smash hit, #1 Box Office record
>no one remembers it
>go off the grid
>come back 14 years later for a sequel
>everyone clowns on it for being a fluke, will mostly likely be a financial bust
>proceeds to rape the box office and goes on track to surpass the first movie

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 14, 2023

I sometimes think maintaining a sexy female physique is harder than getting buff. For the latter, you just schedule/plan your meals and lift heavy. For the former, you not only have to do those, but the process is so fucking complicated compared to the linear progression of "get bigger". There's like 20 different exercises for ass shapes, and if you miss one day out of the two year process, you're out of OF top 20%.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 13, 2023

I fucking hate pedophiles man. Back then, "your daughter is so cute, she'll definitely be attractive when she grows up" was an innocent compliment. Thanks to kid diddlers it's now a stranger danger alarm.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 12, 2023

I've been flipping butterfly knives for the better part of a month. Today might be my last day. My balisong is made of steel. The kitchen floor is tiled with marble. Do the maths.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 12, 2023

every once in a while I remember that westerners dry wipe their ass with tissue paper after taking a shit and I gloat in absolute pride as my cheeks drip wet from the luxury that is a bidet hose

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 11, 2023

I've just crossed 1000 hours played for GTA Online. Is it healthy? I don't know anymore, it's pretty much part of my lifestyle to at least deliver 3 crates to my warehouse once a day.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 9, 2023

Dear game developers,

Please double check before naming your weapons.

Sincerely,
Amused Player

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 6, 2023

i found a new hobby of singing japanese pop songs in an early 2000s pop-punk lead singer accent.

i would sing "kotowaru" as "koutouweirou" while heavily emphasising each syllable and at least spitting once per word.

just imagine 30 seconds to mars singing yoasobi's Into the Night

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 5, 2023

the stars aligned and I've managed to book two shifts from two different jobs in the same mall for two dates. I'll literally be serving my co workers food samples in the morning and selling gaming chairs to my OTHER co workers in the evening.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 5, 2023

AVATAR 2 DOES 1.5 FUCKING BILLION IN THE BOX OFFICE. THE ODDS WERE STACKED 100% AGAINST IT. HOW DOES JAMES CAMERON DO IT. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS HAPPEN TWICE.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 3, 2023

I was speaking to this kid and I told a dumb joke and she asked if I was from Ohio I can't take this shit anymore man

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 3, 2023

dinosaurs, under the influence of perpetually unimpressed, nihilistic adolescents with a passing interest in Paleontology, are now known to gen z to just be giant feathery reptiles akin to chickens.

by that same token, we can now equate geese to dangerous, prehistoric beasts, and that's all the more justification as to why it's fair, civil duty to introduce any stray goose i meet the good name of John Browning.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 2, 2023

I've did some rabbit hole diving into the CSGO skin market and surprisingly enough, it's one of the most stable economies out there, more so than actual countries. something from 2014 costs about as much as it does today, save for some fluctuations but they usually correct themselves in a single day or so.

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  BenJepheneT

• Jan 1, 2023

haven't been posting much, but that's because im working on a full length doujin one shot. yes, there'll be xxx, but it's mainly story first, smut later.

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  BenJepheneT

• Dec 31, 2022

i legit forgot it's a new year i was sound asleep when my ears got gang raped by china's finest smuggled fireworks reenacting pearl harbour's audio scene from my neighbour's porch

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  BenJepheneT

• Dec 30, 2022

my sister's been acting like Wednesday from Wednesday, but I'm not stopping her. She's having her female sigma phase, and I'd hate to ruin such crucial character development.

plus, it's more ammo to make her cringe once she grows up.