Cringe? Heavens no. It’s drastically worse in technical quality but I try to give grace to new writers when analyzing their work. It still makes me smile looking back on all of my work because I can read it with a spirit of charity.
I think its that way with anything. I once watched someone learn on their own to do DRYWALL. First room? It was o-k-a-y... but there were places they didn't know what to do. I guess it came out like a cheap college apartment. By the time they got to the LAST room though, they had learned by doing plus reading and studying it... really nice. Taking extra time for themselves NO professional drywaller would EVER take on it. Smooth as a baby's ass.
When they were done, though. Last room... better than professionally done. First room... *meh*. They tore out the first two or three rooms because now they knew how to do it great. Then just touched up a few places in between. Looked awesome in the end, cost them basically nothing to do it all.
I think writing is like that, as is everything else you have to learn how its done. Reading and studying only does so much, there's a component of experience needed. And when you finally get done, yeah, the early stuff isn't as good.
I keep wanting to be... "there".
For me, "there" = a 200 to 300 page "reads like a paperback back in the day" and I don't think of anything else when reading it.
That's what I aim for.
I keep wondering when I'll hit it.
I figure whenever I get "there", that ONE great paperback will make all the other work getting there, worth it.
i mean, call it cringe, call it newbie syndrome... call it whatever you want. What is this great skill you want to acquire, where day one is the same result as 10,000 hours later in terms of quality. This is normal to me.
remember... or at least this is how I think...
I only need *one* perfect book written.
That's it, just one.