My target is the Japanase LN readers. Is it good to use "telling" more often rather than "showing"?

Boundless

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From what I've gathered through various forums (especially in JP ones) telling the narrative is preferred with a little side of showing. I researched it further and found that they tend to focus more on plot points, world building, and with a little addition to "like" faster updates.

Is there any JP Light Novel readers here? I wanna know your insights about it. If those Light Novels you've read before had narratives inclined to "tell" than "showing." Thanks!
 
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L1aei

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From what I've gathered through various forums (especially in ones) telling the narrative is preferred with a little side of showing. I researched it further and found that they tend to focus more on plot points, world building, and with a little addition to "like" faster updates.

Is there any JP Light Novel readers here? I wanna know your insights about it. If those Light Novels you've read before had narratives inclined to "tell" than "showing." Thanks!

If you're after readers, then why not post this in the Reader's subforum?
 

L1aei

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I thought it should be on author's section because it involves about "writing" mistakes. should I move it?

Let's leave it up to the mods; if it is in the wrong place, they'll move whatever is already here for ya. :blob_okay:
 

MFontana

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From what I've gathered through various forums (especially in ones) telling the narrative is preferred with a little side of showing. I researched it further and found that they tend to focus more on plot points, world building, and with a little addition to "like" faster updates.

Is there any JP Light Novel readers here? I wanna know your insights about it. If those Light Novels you've read before had narratives inclined to "tell" than "showing." Thanks!
I do read a few Light Novel series as well.
That said, the style isn't really more about "telling" or "showing", but rather the execution and blend of both to create and sustain your pacing.
The genre also will really help to shape the present ideals, however I would still encourage breaking the mold to do something new.
Create your own style, and hone it.
Present your narrative within your style, for your target audience.

Some of them (IE: Overlord) do lean very heavy on the "telling" side, but that doesn't make them "good" by any measure of literary craft or quality in English. At least, not in my personal opinion, and in truth, using Overlord as an example, I found the anime far more enjoyable, because the light novels are written in a manner that is far better suited to the visual medium rather than the literary one.

Several, I've noticed, are also written in first-person rather than third-person limited. Which admittedly may just be more common among the Japanese Light Novel medium than it is in English Literature, but those really aren't among my favorites, and several have been a bit grating to read.

Admittedly, this could be a result of translation, and it may read far better in the Japanese language, than it does in English, so do keep that in mind.

However, I would still definitely advise leaning more heavily on the "showing" side of the scale if you're aiming to pursue a classical style or higher literary standards in the English language, especially with how ScribbleHub is for series originally written in English.
 

Placeholder

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> Is there any JP Light Novel readers here?

I've read vast quantities of webnovels in translation at syosetu.com and kakuyomu.jp. I dropped them because the world building was often poor and because the descriptive text of the setting and characters were almost always excerable. Excluding breast size, which was specified with exacting precision.

Maybe the published light novels are better.

But I'd model on Brust, Hambly, Steven Ericsson, etcetera.
 

Boundless

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Some of them (IE: Overlord) do lean very heavy on the "telling" side, but that doesn't make them "good" by any measure of literary craft or quality in English. At least, not in my personal opinion, and in truth, using Overlord as an example, I found the anime far more enjoyable, because the light novels are written in a manner that is far better suited to the visual medium rather than the literary one.
HAHAHAHA yeah my first JP LN is also Overlord! Maybe my narrative style got influenced because of that. I noticed it way back that the story got focused on a grand scale rather than minute details like characters and people.

Anyways, thanks for the insight!
 

Eldoria

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Well, I ignored your misplaced thread.

This time I answer on behalf of causal readers of LN. My short answer... LN fans like telling, not because they like telling, they might not know that there is a better storytelling through showing.

You know, right? Telling and showing are not just about storytelling... it's about reader immersion, about how to involve the reader in interpreting the narrative, about how to make the reader feel as if they can experience the fictional world. Take the following narrative for example:

Telling version:
A blonde-haired girl wearing a rose dress, named Errie, stood in a wheat field. She felt touched, seeing golden grains as far as the eye could see. The afternoon breeze greeted her. The fragrant aroma reminded her of her grandmother's homemade bread.

Showing version:
A girl in a rose dress stands in a wheat field. Her blonde hair flutters as the wind blows. A sweet aroma fills her nose. Golden grains shine in the orange light. Her lips curled upwards as her eyes closed slowly, "Is it delicious, honey?" "Hmm... Errie likes bread." Her gaze is moist. Her left palm is clutching her shirt collar, "Grandma..."

Notice how the two narratives provide different immersions. In the telling version, the readers feel narratively distanced. They only see a 'report' about a girl standing in a wheat field. They just discover that the girl named Errie feels moved and nostalgic when she sees the grains of wheat. But they don't feel how the girl feels. The readers are just neutral observers. Why?

Because the narrator provides an interpretation of what happened to Errie. This makes the reader's mind passive and stops thinking. They just nod and say, "Oh... there's a girl in the wheat field."

On the other hand, the showing version provides a more immersive reading experience. The readers don't just know what happened to Errie, the readers are invited to feel what she experienced. Through cinematic camera and sensory stimulation, readers experience what is happening to Errie. They can almost smell the aroma of wheat, bringing back nostalgic memories of their grandmother.

The sensory narrative and cinematic narrative camera keep the reader's mind actively interpreting the scene. Even without the narrative explicitly mentioning a touching feeling, readers can draw their own conclusions through her memory, body language, dialogue, and atmosphere.

Honestly, as a former LN reader, after I learned how immersive the experience of reading through a showing narrative is... I've become less fond of a telling narrative where the author continues to dictate to the reader through the narrator.

I've tried opening my LN collection, but when I see a telling narrative, I feel uncomfortable. I can't get into the story. I can't feel what the protagonist is experiencing. Instead, I just see a narrator trying to dictate what happens in the story. As a result, I realize I'm 'reading a story'.

A good narrative should ideally be able to hypnotize the readers that forget they're reading fiction. And a telling narrative creates a narrative distance that makes the readers realize they're reading a story, not living in it.

Well, this maybe it's just my subjective opinion as a causal reader... but LN readers might like to tell narratives not because they hate showing... instead, they don't know that there is a narrative that is so beautiful, so immersive, that it makes them forget that they are reading a story, called showing narrative.

It's like a cat keeps eating raw fish because it doesn't know there is a premium food called cat snacks. But if the cat once enjoyed cat snacks, the cat might not be able to enjoy raw fish anymore... and wants to keep eating cat snacks.
 

HungrySheep

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Well, this maybe it's just my subjective opinion as a causal reader... but LN readers might like to tell narratives not because they hate showing... instead, they don't know that there is a narrative that is so beautiful, so immersive, that it makes them forget that they are reading a story, called showing narrative.
You underestimate the amount of people who prefer being spoonfed.
 

Boundless

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Well, this maybe it's just my subjective opinion as a causal reader... but LN readers might like to tell narratives not because they hate showing... instead, they don't know that there is a narrative that is so beautiful, so immersive, that it makes them forget that they are reading a story, called showing narrative.

It's like a cat keeps eating raw fish because it doesn't know there is a premium food called cat snacks. But if the cat once enjoyed cat snacks, the cat might not be able to enjoy raw fish anymore... and wants to keep eating cat snacks.
Then, in all those JP Light Novels you've read, they're inclined more on "telling"?
My goal is to actually write a Light Novel and I feel like the "showing" part should be minimal (sorry, my source materials is few).

Mine was, in fast-paced scenes (fights, intensive movements, heavy discussions/dialogues that is extremely crucial to the plot,) I had this habit of "telling", yet in slow-paced ones (emotional conversation, scenery appreciation, ect) my writing is inclined more on "showing." I have zero idea if what i'm doing is right. Is it, though?
 

Eldoria

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Then, in all those JP Light Novels you've read, they're inclined more on "telling"?
My goal is to actually write a Light Novel and I feel like the "showing" part should be minimal (sorry, my source materials is few).

Mine was, in fast-paced scenes (fights, intensive movements, heavy discussions/dialogues that is extremely crucial to the plot,) I had this habit of "telling", yet in slow-paced ones (emotional conversation, scenery appreciation, ect) my writing is inclined more on "showing." I have zero idea if what i'm doing is right. Is it, though?
If that's the case, that's good enough.

It's not that I hate telling... I just don't like narratives that tell so much that emotions become flat, like reading a report.

Telling is still necessary to summarize scenes, avoid repetition, implement timeskips, and provide thematic conclusions.

Unfortunately, the LNs I've read tend to be tell-heavy. But if you know when to tell and when to show, then that's fine.
 

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> Mine was, in fast-paced scenes (fights, intensive movements, heavy discussions/dialogues that is extremely crucial to the plot,) I had this habit of "telling", yet in slow-paced ones (emotional conversation, scenery appreciation, ect) my writing is inclined more on "showing." I have zero idea if what i'm doing is right. Is it, though?

Copy out pages of Hemingway and Erikssson - classsic writing exercise.
 

CharlesEBrown

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Not really sure - the LNs I've listened to were all translations.
It seems that, the method of translation does make it SEEM like they are doing more "telling" than "showing" but I do think that has more to do with how the language is translated than how it was originally written.
 

Ai-chan

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Light novels rely on the writing being 'easy to read' and 'fast to finish'. Therefore, narration is often preferred as the pacing needs to move forward. The story needs to be told without being mired in exposition and descriptions. Dialogues often bulk up the chapter, overexposition and overdescription bulk it up even more.

Light novels do not want bulk. If the story can be told without all the descriptions (as opposed to western novels with its overdescriptions), it will be told without it. In western novels, if the protagonist is holding a pen, the pen will be described in as much detail as it can be with the protagonist giving a commentary on the pen, otherwise, it won't be 'good'. In light novels, the pen won't even be mentioned.

Remember, light novels are heavily influenced by mobile phone novels (web novels). You're meant to be able to finish a chapter by the time you reach your train station or bus stop.
 

Boundless

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> Mine was, in fast-paced scenes (fights, intensive movements, heavy discussions/dialogues that is extremely crucial to the plot,) I had this habit of "telling", yet in slow-paced ones (emotional conversation, scenery appreciation, ect) my writing is inclined more on "showing." I have zero idea if what i'm doing is right. Is it, though?

Copy out pages of Hemingway and Erikssson - classsic writing exercise.
I've examined their works and it shows that they tend to "show" more rather than telling. If possible, I like to study works which had more "telling" but not to the point that it loses reeader's interest, since JP LN readers are my target...
Light novels rely on the writing being 'easy to read' and 'fast to finish'. Therefore, narration is often preferred as the pacing needs to move forward. The story needs to be told without being mired in exposition and descriptions. Dialogues often bulk up the chapter, overexposition and overdescription bulk it up even more.

Light novels do not want bulk. If the story can be told without all the descriptions (as opposed to western novels with its overdescriptions), it will be told without it. In western novels, if the protagonist is holding a pen, the pen will be described in as much detail as it can be with the protagonist giving a commentary on the pen, otherwise, it won't be 'good'. In light novels, the pen won't even be mentioned.

Remember, light novels are heavily influenced by mobile phone novels (web novels). You're meant to be able to finish a chapter by the time you reach your train station or bus stop.
this actually makes sense.

hm, based on what you're saying, light novels tend to dump sensory details on things that don't actually matter or relevant to the the plot. and when they do, they smudge some sensory details to it. am i right?
 

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light novels tend to dump sensory details on things that don't actually matter
The unskilled authors omit shit thinking it doesn't matter, and it turns out the story is weaker because they never described the the inside of a building, or the sound of traffic, or the feeling a pear has when you bite into it, or how the city works. They just wanted to hit the story beats: "Reincarnated as a $variable_noun with $variable_special_ability. Bought a cheerful compliant directionless sex slave. Now to deconstruct the genre in one particular fussy way/invent soap/use readily available spices to invent 'spiced food'."

But you should ask - how forgettable do you want your story to be? Or are you just going to get a mangaka to do the visual component?
 

Juia_Darkcrest

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Honestly... as both an Author and reader... You need to tell, you need to develop things...

If I compared LN's to a North American equivalent, it would be Youth-Adult novels instead of something like High Fantasy.

Edit (hit enter too soon)

You should focus on worldbuilding and relationship development between scenes of action. You might end up spoon-feeding your readers a bit, but that is better than leaving them confused. It is a fine balance between too much and too little, and every LN I have read has a slightly different take on it.

Good Luck
 

FRWriter

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From what I've gathered through various forums (especially in JP ones) telling the narrative is preferred with a little side of showing. I researched it further and found that they tend to focus more on plot points, world building, and with a little addition to "like" faster updates.

Is there any JP Light Novel readers here? I wanna know your insights about it. If those Light Novels you've read before had narratives inclined to "tell" than "showing." Thanks!

This might sound really mean, but there is a good reason why, despite the success of Manga, Anime, Games, and frankly, even Visual novels, Light Novels haven't been popularized worldwide.

Frankly speaking, the format of light novels has been rejected by the vast majority of people, and only a minor fanbase has been established. Many people view them as inferior books.

Personally, I like them, but most popular LN's have shitty translations. There are barely any good ones around, and they are hard to find/buy.

Targeting that specific genre of readers is hard... simply because why would they read your light novels when they can enjoy the original ones? Now, with AI becoming more and more skilled in a couple of years, you'll be able to read pretty decently translated Japanese light novels, and companies might even release AI assisted-official translations.

Also, Light Novels are not something you should aim for.

They are merely volume-based novels with occasional artworks. The "Light" merely means somewhat casual.

Just write your own story and focus on the plot, and don't try to desperately emulate a certain format.
 

Placeholder

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If I compared LN's to a North American equivalent, it would be Youth-Adult novels instead of something like High Fantasy.
Even some or most modern YA has decent writing.

JLN is, extremely often, opportunistic rehash of popular but insipid JWN. 'I have a compliant catgirl slave and 1000 year old prepubescent sex addict who respect me because a psychopomp gave me a magic smartphone.'

OP should try rewriting or photocopying decent 90s fantasy, striking though "unnecessary" exposition, to see if that makes it better.
 
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