I almost couldn't bear to read it because the paragraphs in chapter one weren't properly spaced. Everything just looked like one huge black block. I use PC, so that might affect things. But it got better from chapter two, so I quickly skimmed past chapter one and got to the main story.
First Impression:
My first impressions of the story weren't bad. And I actually like the title, though I get curious why you decided to put the 'yet another' in the sentence. I like the synopsis too. It's a tad generic, but it tells me everything I need to know, and sets my expectations right.
Thoughts on the Story:
As already mentioned, the first chapter has weird paragraph spacing. That, and 'A God's Cruel World'. Please fix it.
I also didn't like chapter one at all. The rest of the chapters were much better, but it's a bit of a pity, since Chapter one is generally what readers use to decide whether to read a story or not.
For one, there's some repetition that I don't like. You mention this God guy is irritated two times in a row, and you keep saying he's disdainful, all as he and the protagonist just kinda exist in this empty space. I get it. He's a bad guy. Just stop repeating those adjectives, they don't add anything to the story.
For two, God and the protagonist bicker, but it all seems dramatic and forced, and not very natural. If God is truly disdainful, it makes more sense for the all powerful being to just ignore the protagonist instead of making fun of him. This God sounds more mischevious and bored? Anyway, that part personally confused me.
Lastly, the part about the 'gravity' or whatever, felt like showing off using science terms that you don't actually understand. It felt edgy. Especially since in later chapters, it looks like the protagonist isn't the clever or logical type, so it's weird.
The pacing and prose wasn't bad. I'm not going to say perfect. You might want to reread your own work and fix some spots up, but overall it's good to the point that I'm jealous. Pacing is my weak suit, lol. And the story was very clear, so there wasn't anything I couldn't understand. I liked 'The Power of Celestial Weapons', where you had someone explain the omega power stuff.
Lastly, I wanna add that the protagonist, in my opinion, anyway, feels too much like a generic MC. I can't really tell any interesting traits about him, and sometimes he also feels a little inconsistent in his actions. This is just my personal preference, though, so take this with a grain of salt, but I'll like it if you keep in mind how to develop him as the story progresses.
Done. Overall I think the story's great. I hope I wasn't too harsh, lmao. I usually hate system novels but this one was quite good.
Good luck to you, I hope you finish the story!
