The Pressure Of Marriage.

Tyranomaster

Tyranomaster

Guy who writes stuff
Joined
Oct 5, 2022
Messages
746
Points
133
As someone who is married, and is planning on having children in a year or two, there are a lot of reasons people aren't getting married and having kids in the US. Interestingly, most of the reasons are actually not what people think. People point out all sorts of garbage that empirically we know the opposite to be true. "It's too expensive to buy a house, or food" Historically and even in current times, the poor have the most children, it's just a fact. It has very little to do with, 'lack of knowledge of birth control', and a lot more to do with life horizons.

In a wealthy country, many of your daily stressors are outside of your own control, and your expectation to continue living is very high. As your life horizon expands longer, you don't feel the biological drive as much to make a family. It is rare (but obviously not unheard of, all of you who will chime in with "oh oh, I know one, therefore your statement is false") that elderly people regret having a family. Animals thrive in challenge and, to a lesser extent, suffering. If you have a pet, and especially more intelligent pets like dogs or rats, you know that they want to be constantly challenged with new toys or games. They don't like sitting around and only doing the same thing all the time. Humans are like that on steroids.

Often times people mistake satiation with long term happiness. A dog that is kept in a cage and given all the food and water it wants is not a happy dog. Humans thrive on new challenges and difficulties. A few people get that from their jobs (I used to as an engineer), but most only get it from raising another human being.

There is also something to be said about being able to absolutely trust someone to have your back is obviously a big boon as well. No fault divorce has absolutely devastated that aspect of most people's marriages.
 
RepresentingCaution

RepresentingCaution

Level 37 ? ? Pronouns: she/whore ♀
Joined
Apr 15, 2020
Messages
9,797
Points
233
Husband promised to pay the bills because he wanted babies. If we wind up divorced, he'll be paying alimony in addition to child support. If you don't want babies and have similar income, I don't think there's much point in getting married. I wouldn't have agreed to kids without marriage, though.

I also took a human development course in university and have very strong ideals about how to raise children. Childcare costs are through the roof, and the least expensive options are hovels of neglect. Unless you've got enough money for a private nanny, putting your children in the care of others is a last resort.
 
ConansWitchBaby

ConansWitchBaby

Da Scalie Whisperer
Joined
Dec 23, 2020
Messages
1,707
Points
153
They are collectively being a little bitch./s

In truth, it's probably just that numbers are going down to a median. Before, in most places around the world, women couldn't even have their own bank accounts. Men weren't allowed to be with their families by working to death and then socializing obligations after work. Marriages were more cemented by societal pressure and systems that didn't allow for a smooth separation.

Nowadays people aren't outright forced to marriage. Even if there might still be little bitches and not stand their ground against a forced partner. Divorce is easier to initiate to leave harmful environments.

While sentiments on the predatory nature of divorce court are rising, making a more cautious stance prevalent, I would take a grain of salt to it and similar, being enough reasoning to justify the decline. There is far too much nuance than a "I'm 14 and this is deep" take can cover. That all of you and myself are doing here. It's the same bullshit of nuance as people complaining about declining birthrates, while actively blinding themselves whenever the drastic drop in teenage pregnancies since the 1990's does in fact contribute to the numbers. At least here in the U.S. of motherfucking A.
 
C

CharlesEBrown

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 23, 2024
Messages
4,750
Points
158
Daitengu said:
There's no reason to do so when, as a man, I just get my stuff taken by the woman in a divorce, and the courts usually side with the woman.

Heck, just spam your family social feed with vids like:

They'll eventually get he idea that the game has changed and men are the losers.
Click to expand...
For almost two decades, my godfather said this - "I will never get married because why would I want to let some woman I no longer care about take away the house I built for myself..."
Then his high school girlfriend wound up hospitalized because her husband beat her, and my godfather was her first call. Two years later, her ex was still in jail, he married her, sold the house he was so worried about losing, and bought one for himself, his wife and their then soon-to-be-born daughter. Who is now in her early 40s.
 
Jocelyn_Uasal

Jocelyn_Uasal

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 30, 2024
Messages
233
Points
108
Who the hell has 20k to blow on a wedding anyways. Plus, as wages stay the same while inflation and prices increase, people are spending more and more time at work. When am I supposed to find someone to marry???
 
bulmabriefs144

bulmabriefs144

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 30, 2021
Messages
278
Points
83
Dark_Phoenix_Zaetyk said:
What are the reasons most later millennials and Gen Z are not getting married at all?,i'm 27 but the word marriage is a distance nightmare to me.I don't even visit home because i get attacked with the marriage scheme everywhere.....if my mom wants grandkids that's my two siblings work now, it's sad but a pretty normal thing for me.
Click to expand...
There was an online article about this. Basically, teenage through college age students are being propagandized by anti-natal ideas. I think they said there's about a 4% of abortion among married, and about 40% among unmarried, but most of the the millennials assume they can wait until like 45 to get married, and thet have all the stuff from their job. Sorry, at age 30, your pregnancy begins to have birth defects, and the percent of that happening rises each year, until finally you hit menopause and producing eggs is kinda not. That's all assuming they haven't been messed up by transgender ideas. i kinda sorta was considering a transition, then as I sat in the doctor office, I'm like "I don't want this. Nah, scratch that, I really don't want this." What I wanted was to be an actual female and have a womb that could give birth. But I realized transgender SRS surgery would leave me with a body that couldn't reproduce. i decided to be non-op ( a large portion of my fiction is basically anti-transition pro-genderfluidity as a result). The article basically said that the real population in America is covered up by the baby boom, and we're headed for population collapse (we're also headed for a skills collapse, as most schools teach the STEM subjects, but more important than that is the arts and crafts; if our society can't produce cups, bowls, and clothing then we have to rely on other cultures; typically that's how your country gets sacked).
 
Dark_Phoenix_Zaetyk

Dark_Phoenix_Zaetyk

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 4, 2022
Messages
724
Points
133
ArlindoFrancisco said:
Yeah, it's all about selfishness after reading the majority of these.
Click to expand...
And sacrifices
bulmabriefs144 said:
There was an online article about this. Basically, teenage through college age students are being propagandized by anti-natal ideas. I think they said there's about a 4% of abortion among married, and about 40% among unmarried, but most of the the millennials assume they can wait until like 45 to get married, and thet have all the stuff from their job. Sorry, at age 30, your pregnancy begins to have birth defects, and the percent of that happening rises each year, until finally you hit menopause and producing eggs is kinda not. That's all assuming they haven't been messed up by transgender ideas. i kinda sorta was considering a transition, then as I sat in the doctor office, I'm like "I don't want this. Nah, scratch that, I really don't want this." What I wanted was to be an actual female and have a womb that could give birth. But I realized transgender SRS surgery would leave me with a body that couldn't reproduce. i decided to be non-op ( a large portion of my fiction is basically anti-transition pro-genderfluidity as a result). The article basically said that the real population in America is covered up by the baby boom, and we're headed for population collapse (we're also headed for a skills collapse, as most schools teach the STEM subjects, but more important than that is the arts and crafts; if our society can't produce cups, bowls, and clothing then we have to rely on other cultures; typically that's how your country gets sacked).
Click to expand...
Wow you really outlined it.
 
RedMuffin

RedMuffin

OwO
Joined
May 6, 2024
Messages
997
Points
108
Voidiris said:
Who could have guessed that humans only live for their interests.
Click to expand...
Me! Me! I guessed it! I'm the best!
ff7ab9b997b3db5f3aa6a357b9eee8f94210b525594f5d87f13316e67374641a.jpg
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top