Help me choose my writting style!

[CharlesEBrown]

Well it's true that my MC in this book is supposed to be very cold but at the same time I want people to read it and not feel bored nor confused you know? I don't know if I'm making any sense

Ah - and here is where my comment about this being "just a fragment" becomes relevant; the first version conveys this better than the second. Both work, mind you, and the second is generally easier to read but the first shows the attitude you describe more effectively.

 

[RepresentingDesire]

Well it's true that my MC in this book is supposed to be very cold but at the same time I want people to read it and not feel bored nor confused you know? I don't know if I'm making any sense

Do you mean emotionless or callous cold? These two are very different thing.

 

[MatchaChocolate69]

Well it's true that my MC in this book is supposed to be very cold but at the same time I want people to read it and not feel bored nor confused you know? I don't know if I'm making any sense

I think you'll find a way to make it work. Eventually, you'll reach a synthesis of your writing style. You have the ability to do it.
Other people's opinions can give you some direction, but ultimately, you should write the way you want to write. You can make it less confusing while still maintaining the coldness, but it all depends on what you want to convey with the character's thoughts. For me, it happens naturally when I put myself in the character's shoes and understand how they act or think, and what their goals are. Essentially, it's a form of acting. Even confusion can be a useful tool.

 

[Not_A_Symphony]

Do you mean emotionless or callous cold? These two are very different thing.

No no, she's not emotionless. She's basically just super cold and a bit sadistic

I think you'll find a way to make it work. Eventually, you'll reach a synthesis of your writing style. You have the ability to do it.
Other people's opinions can give you some direction, but ultimately, you should write the way you want to write. You can make it less confusing while still maintaining the coldness, but it all depends on what you want to convey with the character's thoughts. For me, it happens naturally when I put myself in the character's shoes and understand how they act or think, and what their goals are. Essentially, it's a form of acting. Even confusion can be a useful tool.

Yeah I agree, I tend to do the same but it's not exactly helping me with deciding on the writing stlye which is a bummer..

Ah - and here is where my comment about this being "just a fragment" becomes relevant; the first version conveys this better than the second. Both work, mind you, and the second is generally easier to read but the first shows the attitude you describe more effectively.

I see, I appreciate your input! Yeah I'll take that into consideration, thank you so much And yeah, being a fragment one can't make a full-fledged decision but I guess I just wanted input with a little bit of it and without troubling everyone