Darkest Chapter (Comedy Optional)

bulmabriefs144

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What is the darkest (or darkest comedy) chapter you've written so far?

My personal record is making a McDonald's stand-in serve zombie meat. When someone balks, they're like "You're right, that won't do as part of our regular menu, it might contaminate the other stuff. Let's make it a special!" I conclude with, And that was her last day in the restaurant industry.
 

Seaspecter

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Well my generally light-hearted adventure story had a chapter where the MC gave a little girl who was serving drinks a tip, later that night the girl was beaten to death for said tip. After that happened a bunch of men staying at the inn lynched the murder in the barn in front of the MC.
 

CarburetorThompson

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My latest one shot. (I say latest but I wrote it 2 years ago.) was probably the darkest thing I’ve wrote. The setting is very bleak, based in a war over violent occupation and racial oppression. Story is written from the pov of two fighter pilots. It has strong themes, of past vs future, despair vs hope. Won’t spoil too much, because it’s probably the only good thing I’ve written and I still hold out hope of getting past 100 views on it.

I rewrote the ending a few times before posting it because the original ending was so miserable that it was making me depressed irl lol
 

FrankieCheng

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Published? A flashback of one of my characters as a child being forcibly turned into a kind of sin-eater through a pretty nasty ritual.
Not yet published? Gruesome death of a major character.
 
D

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Soldiers being eaten alive by a werewolf, a little girl stabbing her way through an orphanage, or the death of my MCs loved ones by a drunk driver.
 

Syringe

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Too many from me.

1. Revelation that the City (of the old) largely ran on the emotions and products of an entity known as the Captured Star, in the context of a civilization/world that no longer has stars in its sky. The Captured Star turns out to be a living entity that allowed mankind to live well past their expiration (hence why they are huddled into a single city of nearly a hundred billion).

2. The fact that people that leave a process called the 'Replication Cycle' (which allows people to revive at the price of irreversible mutation and must kill their past instance to prove they are superior) are not truly eliminated but are instead preserved and left to rot endlessly whilst keeping their senses, eventually constituting as the biomass that made up what was discovered as a/one of the Hearts of the City.

3. People were readily accepting the death of a child for the sake of someone's twisted version of salvation. It has become the norm in their part of the world where hope has been lost, and where despair manifests into monsters of cognition.

4. Civilizations/sapient beings are farmed and treated as livestock by living Hearts. One of which had 1/3 of the population surrender their eyes, 1/3 surrender their tongue, and 1/3 surrender their hearing. All transactions are made with life and the organs of individuals. Was carnival themed, with the perpetrators calling their Heart/Impuritas Group the Blood Festival.

5. A father returning home to find his daughter (and the rest of the city) had transformed into mindless slime blobs and a homogeneous mass of flesh-like ivy that smeared the walls and floors of the city. The only hint of his daughter's former self were the cat-ears on the slime's head. Father proceeds to condemn the world and manifests his internalized woes, becoming a burning candle. It symbolizes the power of a common flame and how transitory a candle-flame is, as he inevitably self-destructs. Even worse is that his daughter also manifested her woes, seeing herself as the sole cause of everyone's suffering and transforming into a flaming blade that hurts its user to reflect said woe.
 

RepresentingPride

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The city of my mc getting attacked by beast, him rushing toward his family house to find almost all his family dead.
 

bulmabriefs144

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Well my generally light-hearted adventure story had a chapter where the MC gave a little girl who was serving drinks a tip, later that night the girl was beaten to death for said tip. After that happened a bunch of men staying at the inn lynched the murder in the barn in front of the MC.
Dude!

I usually avoid having things happen to little girls.
 

Rhaps

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My MC sentencing a group of people to wander around in a library of infinite books, they can only leave if they find their own biography. In here, they cannot die from starvation or thirst, they cannot kill themselves. Everytime they take out a book, all books reshuffled, and the shelves themselves are as high as the sky. Many of my reader don't realized how dark it truly is.

Then my MC's bodyguard, the person that was supposed to protect her, made her sign what essentially was a slavery contract with vague descriptions and no actual end date. Even though it was a bust, forcing a naive child to sign it was pretty dark.

And then there is the Eldritch God of our solar system, who sentenced many other worlds across the universe to total annihilation, not caring one bit. It got so bad they was given a restraining order for 3 billion years, though that sentence is about to end.
 

Rhaps

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Too many from me.

1. Revelation that the City (of the old) largely ran on the emotions and products of an entity known as the Captured Star, in the context of a civilization/world that no longer has stars in its sky. The Captured Star turns out to be a living entity that allowed mankind to live well past their expiration (hence why they are huddled into a single city of nearly a hundred billion).

2. The fact that people that leave a process called the 'Replication Cycle' (which allows people to revive at the price of irreversible mutation and must kill their past instance to prove they are superior) are not truly eliminated but are instead preserved and left to rot endlessly whilst keeping their senses, eventually constituting as the biomass that made up what was discovered as a/one of the Hearts of the City.

3. People were readily accepting the death of a child for the sake of someone's twisted version of salvation. It has become the norm in their part of the world where hope has been lost, and where despair manifests into monsters of cognition.

4. Civilizations/sapient beings are farmed and treated as livestock by living Hearts. One of which had 1/3 of the population surrender their eyes, 1/3 surrender their tongue, and 1/3 surrender their hearing. All transactions are made with life and the organs of individuals. Was carnival themed, with the perpetrators calling their Heart/Impuritas Group the Blood Festival.

5. A father returning home to find his daughter (and the rest of the city) had transformed into mindless slime blobs and a homogeneous mass of flesh-like ivy that smeared the walls and floors of the city. The only hint of his daughter's former self were the cat-ears on the slime's head. Father proceeds to condemn the world and manifests his internalized woes, becoming a burning candle. It symbolizes the power of a common flame and how transitory a candle-flame is, as he inevitably self-destructs. Even worse is that his daughter also manifested her woes, seeing herself as the sole cause of everyone's suffering and transforming into a flaming blade that hurts its user to reflect said woe.
Kinda disappointing, need to pump those numbers of crimes against humanity up! More trauma! More Distortion!
 

Flashwolf96

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I write dark stuff on the regular, but in terms of what's on this site they can be found in two of my novels.

Two schoolgirls stumble across their possessed classmate committing some good ol' necro with her crush's corpse following his apparent suicide. Gets even darker once she pulls a knife out, then starts stabbing the corpse and herself until she... y'know, "finishes".

MC needs to commit a sin to enter a murder game, so her classmate brings her a paralyzed puppy and offers to film her beating it to death with a rock. She hesitates, but a second later reveals that it's only because she wasn't expecting the requirement to be so easy. Brutal puppy murder ensues in glorious detail.

As an added bonus, said classmate reveals her own sin to be having drowned her baby sister in the bathtub. Made worse by the fact that it wasn't even to enter the game; she just did it cuz her sister was being a brat splashing her and the impulse came. Dregs Game in general is pretty messed, since I was going through some stuff at the time and needed an outlet.
 

Ilikewaterkusa

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What is the darkest (or darkest comedy) chapter you've written so far?

My personal record is making a McDonald's stand-in serve zombie meat. When someone balks, they're like "You're right, that won't do as part of our regular menu, it might contaminate the other stuff. Let's make it a special!" I conclude with, And that was her last day in the restaurant industry.
too depressing to be considered depressing
 

BlackKnightX

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In my first series ever, a slave boy tries to help the MC by killing the slave trader. Betraying the master goes against the magic command set in his collar, so it clutches his neck tight and severs his head in the process. Oh, and a few minutes later, the MC's maid whom she loves like a sister gets her arm bit off by a magical beast, loses a lot of blood, and dies. All this happens in front of the MC.
 

Nexus_English

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High school, psychotic, yandere girl does unspeakable things to her schoolmates.
 

LilRora

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My personal darkest is probably a chapter featuring a nightmare of being tortured. Hard to say, because there's a lot of factors that make a chapter, and I've a couple other contenders, like a chapter where the mc gets killed but comes back to life.
 

TheEldritchGod

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What is the darkest (or darkest comedy) chapter you've written so far?
You want to limit me to only one CHAPTER?
How about a BOOK?
Tales from the trenches. A dark comedy Fan Fiction about the Seige of Vraks. It's an anthology.
It starts out funny, but by the end you are rooting for a rotting skeleton that is animated only by shame as it wields a rusty shovel trying to hold the line against alien horrors in the name of the god emperor. It begins with comedy, keeps the comedy going, slowly slips in absurd horror, then eventually ends on bitter sweet that will have you saluting the book while muttering, "Via con Dios, Epsilon-228"

Here's one of my favorate sections:

Zhofor walked into the room, towering over the crowd as it went silent. He looked at all the mortals and forced a smile. His advisors indicated that he needed to appear more friendly if he was going to get the mortals to throw their lives away for him. He inwardly cursed and thought to himself, ~The things I do for Khorne...~

"Hello Everyone!" He smiled and waved as he walked across the room, "So glad I could attend your ceremony. What is it called again?"

One of the older men spoke up, "It's called a Boy Scout court of honors, lord Zhofor." Zhofor eyed the little man. He was bent and withered with age, his skin was tight against his skull. Zhofor pushed down the urge to grab this weakling by the neck and tear the skull loose. He comforted himself that such a skull was unlikely to be worthy of the skull throne.

"Ah Yes!" Zhofor snapped his fingers, "Of course. Where are the two candidates?"

Two sets of parents stepped forward, each pair had a son wearing a brown shirt with multiple badges on a sash across their chests, "Here!" One called out. As Zhofor walked over, the parents introduced the children as Semeyaza and Felix. Lord Zhofor loomed over them and repeated the names as if trying to memorize them, "Semeyaza and Felix. Well. It's not often there are only two candidates for this sort of thing, but we'll make do."

He put a hand on the back of the head of both of them and directed them up onto the stage. To others it may have seemed encouraging. Zhofor was sizing them up, wondering which one would be a good match for that little space on the skull throne he just can't -=quite=- find the right cranium for.

Lord Zhofor turned them around to face the crowd and then took up a position several feet behind them, "Well. No sense putting this off. Let's get this ceremony going!"

Lord Zhofor raised both his hands towards the crowd as they applauded and cheered. He thought to himself, ~Felix. Definitely Felix.~

The two boys were friends since the day they could walk, both beamed a smile out over the crowd of assembled people. There were so few things to be happy about as of late, so people were glad to have something positive to talk about for a change. The crowd was abuzz with excitement.

Which is why Semeyaza found it odd how everyone in the room abruptly went silent. Felix on the other hand was wondering why the crowd was just staring at the area above and behind them.

A blade with the runes of Khorne and various dark powers carved into it landed with a clatter on the stage between the two boys. They both looked down at it, then slowly up at the one who obviously had thrown it. Lord Zhofor returned the gaze with a soft smile.

There was a long moment in which nothing happened, as the children were visibly confused. They didn't know what to do. Lord Zhofor waited expectantly, then finally spoke, "Well?" He gestured at the blade, "Go on."

There was a pause as long as a single heartbeat.

"Make it quick."
My personal record is making a McDonald's stand-in serve zombie meat. When someone balks, they're like "You're right, that won't do as part of our regular menu, it might contaminate the other stuff. Let's make it a special!" I conclude with, And that was her last day in the restaurant industry.
Because she got promoted to management at the parent corporation?
And then there is the Eldritch God of our solar system, who sentenced many other worlds across the universe to total annihilation, not caring one bit. It got so bad they was given a restraining order for 3 billion years, though that sentence is about to end.
DUDE! WHAT THE HELL?
Do I go around talking about your obsession with Funko Pops?

Oh, What the heck. You got me rereading Tales from the trenches. I loved that one. I need to clean it up sometime.

I love this one, because it is exactly what the space marines ACTUALLY did.
Lord Inquisitor Hector Rex squinted at High Commander Ortys, "Run that by me again."

High Commander Ortys nodded, "Of course. I'll start at the beginning." He cleared his throat, "Now then, the start of our assault will begin when our men attack these bunkers... here." He stabbed a finger at a point on the map near the pilgrim gate.

Rex scratched his head, "And you are going to drop a plasma warhead on top of the objective to soften it up BEFORE you attack?"

Ortys shook his head, "No No No. We're going to drop a plasma warhead on top of the objective AS my men attack! The superheated plasma will provide cover!" He nodded slowly, "Much more effective than smoke rounds."

Rex stared at Ortys a long time before he spoke, "Won't... bathing your own men in plasma have some..." He rolled his hand in the air, "adverse effects?"

Ainea held up a finger, "There's an old saying, 'Ninjas can't catch you if you are on fire.'"

Rex stared at the finger, "You don't say."

Ortys nodded, "Indeed."

Rex rubbed his brow, "What's next?"

Ortys pointed, "My men will rush forward, used shaped melter charges to burn their way into the bunkers, and slaughter everyone inside. Meanwhile, we can expect the enemy to rain holy hell down on those bunkers as they fall."

Rex eyes darted back and forth, "Annnnnd... what will they do about it?"

Ortys looked a little confused, "Well, they'll shoot back, of course. I mean... duh!" He then dragged a finger across the map, "So they'll run between each bunker, which is about a hundred yards, in less then three seconds or they'll be ripped to shreds."

Rex nodded and started getting a sinking feeling in his stomach, "Right."

Ortys looking all excited continued, "Then I will personally ride up the road in the lead personel carrier of the main assault."

Rex pointed at the map, "And your plans for those walls guns?"

Ortys sighs, "Well, we'll take some potshots at them with the whirlwinds, but with any luck we'll get to use the battle barge!"

Rex blinked, "Excuse me?"

Ortys started speaking louder and slower, "Bat-tel Bar-g-uh. Battle barge. We'll have it drop into low orbit and bombard the gatehouse."

Rex turned white, "Isn't that a little... dangerous?"

Ortys held both hands up at Rex and shook them from side to side, "NAH. He's going to use the small missiles. Merely the size of a city block. Shouldn't be an issue."

Rex rubbed his forehead for a second, "That is where we're going to have a problem. What if the battle barge misses?"

Ortys stared at Rex like he just sprouted a second head, "Beg your pardon?"

Rex straightened up, "The gunner on the battle barge. If he is off by a single degree he could wipe out entire regiments!"

Ortys just stared at Rex for a full minute before he hooked a thumb over his shoulder, "Mike doesn't miss."

Rex rolled his eyes, "Everyone misses eventually!"

Ortys narrowed his eyes at Rex. Time passed. Eventually Ortys spoke, "You came in the grey transport parked out on the tarmac, right?"

At that very moment a series of explosions went off on the tarmac. The whole building shook, but was otherwise unharmed. Rex rushed to the window and watched the rising cloud of dust. As it cleared, it revealed the Lord Inquisitor's transport was still intact. A series of explosions had apparently gone off around it.

Eventually Rex could see that the explosions had created a giant smiley face around Rex's transport, with his transport playing the part of the nose.

Ortys cleared his throat, "Like I said..." He reached forward to pull the string on the window blind. It slid down cutting off the view of the tarmac.





"Mike Doesn't Miss."

And one more...

Entry Date: #ERROR#

To: Medical

A heads up about the High Energy Cheese Food. Apparently when they said High Energy, they meant radioactivity, not calories. Don't bother trying to treat anyone who ate some, they are already dead. If they are still moving about, encourage them to make a suicidal charge at the enemy as soon as possible. Tell them lasgun fire is the cure or something.

Oh. I'm sure the morgue has already figured this out, but the bodies explode about an hour after they die. DO NOT CREMATE ANY OF THE BODIES. That just makes things so much worse.

We did get around to asking the Tzeentchian scientists, "What The Fuck?".

They calmly explained that they informed us it was High Energy Cheese FOOD. As in, food you feed to cheese, and not something you feed to anything with a pressurized circulatory system.

I say they could have been more clear, but they do have a point.

So for now we are locking up the high Energy Cheese Food for everybody's sake.
 
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bulmabriefs144

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Because she got promoted to management at the parent corporation?
:s_wink:

...No, because she left.

She goes on to move to a new apartment where they turn out to be in a BDSM femdom circle, and her job promotes her from design artist to fashion company, to the same company making clothes for music and movie industry, to working for makeup and costumes for several artists, to being a pop star after one of the dancers is missing. It's kinda a silly story at this point.
 
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