Low fantasy / Industrial fantasy

Thuglife8934

Active member
Joined
Mar 11, 2023
Messages
15
Points
43
Setting:
Humanity has always been the butt of many jokes by the elder races, such as when the elves "invited" some human artisans and "purchased" some human goods which meant they kidnaped and held them hostage until they gave up their goods or when a dwarf king "asked" a human empire for men and iron, I could go on and on about such incidents but the thing is humans live fairly short lives around 80 cycles whereas most if not all so-called elder races live for around 1000 cycles some even further this has caused humans to be considered as children although what they fail to understand is children have certain wisdom of their own. In an unremarkable city in quite a remarkable place, a certain use for a certain mineral was discovered meanwhile in the far north an accident while creating a miracle drug led to what can only be considered a breakthrough in pyrotechnics. The elder races either unaware or uncaring for the discoveries of humanity ignored the strange rumors of human cities being twice or even four times their original sizes they ignored their merchants who told them tails of how the cities of humanity were choked by smog and of the rains that would even dissolve leather inscribed with protection magic or the strange clothes and buildings that where being build of glass and steel not of rocks and wood or of the strange wagons that made the Orkish caravans useless.

Then came the proclamation it was not any old proclamation no it was a proclamation from humanity to everyone it went as "We humanity on the date 19th of the 5th month of the year 1884 of the 9th age declare that we have united under a single flag under a single empire under a single nation, may the Gods have mercy on our enemies for we shall not" and hence the country called the United Empire of Redrax was born the Kingdom Of Leonia was a kingdom made up of various types of elves who considered the now United Empire an enemy soon war was declared and on the river bed of the city of Gerdontignel a new weapon would be unleashed the Feins Armored Units or simply known as FAUs where armored behemoths of steel and techno-magical circuits within few cycles the war was lost the kingdom forces retreated. Now the Elder races are afraid of the age of magic ending and the age of steel and smoke beginning.

Prompt:
Mc is from one of the elder races i.e. elves, dwarfs, orks, dragons, etc. Exploring humanity going through what pretty much is a Magical Industrial Revolution with mechs and stuff.
Map:
1696578318616.png

The FAUs:
1696578376259.png
















The Weapons of the infantry:
1696578610880.png
 

Assurbanipal_II

Nyampress of the Four Corners of the World
Joined
Jul 27, 2019
Messages
2,725
Points
153
Setting:
Humanity has always been the butt of many jokes by the elder races, such as when the elves "invited" some human artisans and "purchased" some human goods which meant they kidnaped and held them hostage until they gave up their goods or when a dwarf king "asked" a human empire for men and iron, I could go on and on about such incidents but the thing is humans live fairly short lives around 80 cycles whereas most if not all so-called elder races live for around 1000 cycles some even further this has caused humans to be considered as children although what they fail to understand is children have certain wisdom of their own. In an unremarkable city in quite a remarkable place, a certain use for a certain mineral was discovered meanwhile in the far north an accident while creating a miracle drug led to what can only be considered a breakthrough in pyrotechnics. The elder races either unaware or uncaring for the discoveries of humanity ignored the strange rumors of human cities being twice or even four times their original sizes they ignored their merchants who told them tails of how the cities of humanity were choked by smog and of the rains that would even dissolve leather inscribed with protection magic or the strange clothes and buildings that where being build of glass and steel not of rocks and wood or of the strange wagons that made the Orkish caravans useless.

Then came the proclamation it was not any old proclamation no it was a proclamation from humanity to everyone it went as "We humanity on the date 19th of the 5th month of the year 1884 of the 9th age declare that we have united under a single flag under a single empire under a single nation, may the Gods have mercy on our enemies for we shall not" and hence the country called the United Empire of Redrax was born the Kingdom Of Leonia was a kingdom made up of various types of elves who considered the now United Empire an enemy soon war was declared and on the river bed of the city of Gerdontignel a new weapon would be unleashed the Feins Armored Units or simply known as FAUs where armored behemoths of steel and techno-magical circuits within few cycles the war was lost the kingdom forces retreated. Now the Elder races are afraid of the age of magic ending and the age of steel and smoke beginning.

Prompt:
Mc is from one of the elder races i.e. elves, dwarfs, orks, dragons, etc. Exploring humanity going through what pretty much is a Magical Industrial Revolution with mechs and stuff.
Map:
View attachment 22681
The FAUs:
View attachment 22682















The Weapons of the infantry:
View attachment 22683
If we know anything about humans, then that we are never united at any time. ?

PS The world feels smallish. Setting it in an industrial setting causes a few issues.
 

Thuglife8934

Active member
Joined
Mar 11, 2023
Messages
15
Points
43
cringe

tell me you're writing a fantasy without telling you're writing a fantasy

I and the other elders use the capital we possess to privatise the meams of production, dominate the human market and make humanity de-facto slaves.
for the first thing yeah sorry was feeling edgy. Second thing yeah I mean come on it's a good trope. Third thing yes you could do that but who is going to agree with you the elder races have their own issues like dwarfs being too stubborn or elves being too prideful or dragons being too greedy.
 

oniondouble

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 20, 2023
Messages
18
Points
53
Wilde, is a dragon. Born through sheer grit and willpower, he has managed to live through the brutal processes of natural selection that every dragon has to go through.
A dragon has an approximately 1 million cycle average lifespan, have it been any other races they would've went mad in half of that time.
Thus Wilde was gifted an unhealthy amount of obsession to make him sane throughout his entire life.
And that was knowledge.
Or at least some sort of knowledge, he hadn't thought much about his obsession since he always went with his heart, foot first.
Thus he traveled, slowly getting stronger and formidable, he could narrate all his life all he want but most of it are unexciting if not flat out boring.
Sure he fought some cool or otherwise extremely dangerous enemies, went adventuring to the most dangerous dungeon, learnt dark, holy, transformation, and other magic, but it was lackluster after doing it for so long.
Then he stumbled into humans.
They are weak, dumb, and a fragile race, he definitely could not said anything about that statement but what he find... Is that they're damn persistent.
Really, really persistent.
Their short lifespan compared to other race made them weaker as an individual and the elder council made it even worse than it sounded with their incessant, petty and an undisguised hatred of human... Information warfare.
They shut down so many bright minds because of their little game that even I had to intervene.
Imagine my surprise that they fought and won against the elder council, using something that even piqued my interest.
You see, human have invented something called... Science, it was interesting for sure but it only worked if magic was erased in the equation... But that thing... They must've managed to figure out the essence of magic.
It's extremely huge with a bipedal frame, it is 50 meter in height which almost rivaled my dragon form, armed with the BGSA (brigade grenadier shockwave assault) in one hand and a plasma sword in the other.
It was a sight as it teared down thousands of troops before the enemy could figured out what was going on.
As the human would say... Don't bring a sword in a gunfight.
 

Thuglife8934

Active member
Joined
Mar 11, 2023
Messages
15
Points
43
If we know anything about humans, then that we are never united at any time. ?

PS The world feels smallish. Setting it in an industrial setting causes a few issues.
For the first point, you are not wrong, but when some greater threat appears, such as a disease like smallpox or COVID-19, humanity tends to unite under a single cause in this setting most other races consider humanity like a needed nuisance so if they get a chance yes they would certainly k*ll them off but they are cheap and easy labor. For the second point, I have a bigger map the issue is with the upload limit of scribblehub itself so cant really do anything abt it.
 

ThrillingHuman

always be casual, never be careless
Joined
Feb 13, 2019
Messages
4,738
Points
183
Third thing yes you could do that but who is going to agree with you the elder races have their own issues like dwarfs being too stubborn or elves being too prideful or dragons being too greedy.
Sigh.

Imagine you have this underdevelop subpeople who have land. What do you do with it? You "educate them", "protect them" or such. They naturally are incapable of doing it on their own. They have short lives and are barbaric in nature. They'd kill themselves without you! Have you measured their skulls? These peas for brains can't tell a leaf from a front door without your, superior, dwarven guidance.

Their work your fields, they build your homes, they mine your mines. In any case, you now have their lands and their lives. You control all of theirs and them.

Maybe time passes and you realise that, ohv what you did was very inhumane (indwarfane whatever). Poor things. But oh well, what;s done is done.

Now they begin trying to industrialise. Building industries is not easy. It requires capital. Who has the capital? You. Who doesn't have it? Them.

At this point you basically own them all and they probably have some ruling class whose interests are directly tied to your own. Because you are a person who is not a fantasy carricature of some human trait and you live long enough to know what you want and how to get it.

And now they become not just slaves, but very productive slaves. Yay.

But wait, things aren't going so well. They become discontent, begin to unite and, oh woe, want to get rid of you! Profits fall. The terror. Those sillies.

Don't they know that you aren't to blame? It's them being stupid and lazy that they can't make a life for themselves without you! You do everything for them!

It must be those stupid evil elves! They are to blame! Human pride! Yes, humans are better than those elves. God have mercy on them for we won't, right? We stand united, right?
 
Last edited:

Assurbanipal_II

Nyampress of the Four Corners of the World
Joined
Jul 27, 2019
Messages
2,725
Points
153
For the first point, you are not wrong, but when some greater threat appears, such as a disease like smallpox or COVID-19, humanity tends to unite under a single cause in this setting most other races consider humanity like a needed nuisance so if they get a chance yes they would certainly k*ll them off but they are cheap and easy labor. For the second point, I have a bigger map the issue is with the upload limit of scribblehub itself so cant really do anything abt it.
"when some greater threat appears, such as a disease like smallpox or COVID-19, humanity tends to unite under a single cause"

This is not what really happened ... Quite the contrary ...

"other races consider humanity like a needed nuisance so if they get a chance yes they would certainly k*ll them off but they are cheap and easy labor."

This seems rather forced to create a certain scenario. Reminds me of propaganda for beginners.

"For the second point, I have a bigger map the issue is with the upload limit of scribblehub itself so cant really do anything abt it."

Good work there. Did you calculate circumference and distances, I wonder. I did some mapping too, and I basically ended up calculating travelling times.
 

Thuglife8934

Active member
Joined
Mar 11, 2023
Messages
15
Points
43
Imagine you have this underdevelop subpeople who have land. What do you do with it? You "educate them", "protect them" or such. They naturally are incapable of doing it on their own. They have short lives and are barbaric in nature. They'd kill themselves without you! Have you measured their skulls? These peas for brains can't tell a leaf from a front door without your, superior, dwarven guidance.
In this same line of thinking imagine if you are a dragon you have tons and tons of gold, mithril, adamantine, and other precious minerals why would you part with them for some underdeveloped backwater country or you are elf a powerful mage and extremely proficient in bow arts why would you with your pure elven heritage go some country which not only use guns but also don't have any forests for you and your tribe or you are proud grey beard dwarf a master smith and stubborn to the bone why would you leave your glorious forge and go somewhere where iron and steel is used to make profane creations.
 

ThrillingHuman

always be casual, never be careless
Joined
Feb 13, 2019
Messages
4,738
Points
183
why would you part with them for some underdeveloped backwater country
yes, why do those dragons who are already rich want more?
you are elf a powerful mage and extremely proficient in bow arts why would you with your pure elven heritage go some country which not only use guns
why not conquer more land of savages who use bows and swords because they have been known for a while for your proud homeland.
you and your tribe or you are proud grey beard dwarf a master smith and stubborn to the bone why would you leave your glorious forge and go somewhere where iron and steel is used to make profane creations.
sigh, this is getting asinine. Whatver. You sound like the kind of guy who believes history is written by great men who are born into greatness. I don't know how to talk with this kind without suffocating from exasperation
 

Thuglife8934

Active member
Joined
Mar 11, 2023
Messages
15
Points
43
"when some greater threat appears, such as a disease like smallpox or COVID-19, humanity tends to unite under a single cause"

This is not what really happened ... Quite the contrary ...

"other races consider humanity like a needed nuisance so if they get a chance yes they would certainly k*ll them off but they are cheap and easy labor."

This seems rather forced to create a certain scenario. Reminds me of propaganda for beginners.
I initially had plans for other human nations cuz the map I made is pretty big but I ended up scraping the idea but yeah now re-reading the whole thing it is a bit forced for the scale the map is 1000x1000
yes, why do those dragons who are already rich want more?

why not conquer more land of savages who use bows and swords because they have been known for a while for your proud homeland.
This actually could be an interesting story tho I really don't like the trope of dragons being overpowered I do like the idea of an elven warrior or chief fighting for their homeland or for expanding their influence
@Ai-chan ??? Someone desecrated the writing prompts subforum.
I do not understand what I have desecrated I have followed the guide given can you please explain what have I done wrong? should I remove the writing prompt tag?
 
Last edited:

Assurbanipal_II

Nyampress of the Four Corners of the World
Joined
Jul 27, 2019
Messages
2,725
Points
153
I initially had plans for other human nations cuz the map I made is pretty big but I ended up scraping the idea but yeah now re-reading the whole thing it is a bit forced for the scale the map is 1000x1000

This actually could be an interesting story tho I really don't like the trope of dragons being overpowered I do like the idea of an elven warrior or chief fighting for their homeland or for expanding their influence

I do not understand what I have desecrated I have followed the guide given can you please explain what have I done wrong? should I remove the writing prompt tag?
:blob_cookie: It is one of the reasons why I set my fantasy generally before the age of discovery. Then you have an excuse for the lack of scale and can just talk about far, far, far away countries.

Because face it, the landmass of earth is huge and your map points at a densely populated region. So it can't be that big, which must means people either didn't explore the planet yet, or you have a dwarf planet. But the later would pose other problems.
 

Thuglife8934

Active member
Joined
Mar 11, 2023
Messages
15
Points
43
:blob_cookie: It is one of the reasons why I set my fantasy generally before the age of discovery. Then you have an excuse for the lack of scale and can just talk about far, far, far away countries.

Because face it, the landmass of earth is huge and your map points at a densely populated region. So it can't be that big, which must means people either didn't explore the planet yet, or you have a dwarf planet. But the later would pose other problems.
Yeah you are correct about not having space to expand and such but this is just a writing prompt thread so kinda out of the scope of the thread.
 

SsemouyOnan

Black cherry flavoured redshift
Joined
May 29, 2022
Messages
418
Points
133
This is not a writing prompt. You are bouncing your ideas off people, that would prolly be in Author General or Story Feedback, if you want feedback.

I'm no rules lawyer, but I'm quite sure you're supposed to give a premise and some general guidelines (.i.e, write 200 words). Not "write my novel for me" :)
 

RepresentingWrath

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 7, 2020
Messages
13,556
Points
283
I do not understand what I have desecrated I have followed the guide given can you please explain what have I done wrong? should I remove the writing prompt tag?
I will quote Ai-chan. "This is the writing prompt section. Write a story. The writing prompt section is for improving authors actual writing skills. It's not a place for discussions or opinion threads. If you don't know what a writing prompt is, just look at the pinned thread on top."

So yeah, you should've either ignore or report those messages for being off-topic since this is the wrong subforum for discussions.
 

Thuglife8934

Active member
Joined
Mar 11, 2023
Messages
15
Points
43
I will quote Ai-chan. "This is the writing prompt section. Write a story. The writing prompt section is for improving authors actual writing skills. It's not a place for discussions or opinion threads. If you don't know what a writing prompt is, just look at the pinned thread on top."

So yeah, you should've either ignore or report those messages for being off-topic since this is the wrong subforum for discussions.
Ahh sorry if it came out wrong my bad I'll delete this thread if that's alright? It seems I can't delete the thread although I am extremely sorry for going off topic
 

RepresentingWrath

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 7, 2020
Messages
13,556
Points
283
Ahh sorry if it came out wrong my bad I'll delete this thread if that's alright? It seems I can't delete the thread although I am extremely sorry for going off topic
No worries. Also no need to delete it, you can simply ask to move this thread into a different subforum. To do this I think you need to report your first post, and ask for it to be moved.
 

Thuglife8934

Active member
Joined
Mar 11, 2023
Messages
15
Points
43
No worries. Also no need to delete it, you can simply ask to move this thread into a different subforum. To do this I think you need to report your first post, and ask for it to be moved.
I have report it and have request for it to be moved to a relevant sub forum
 

Lodur

Eight virgin
Joined
Sep 9, 2020
Messages
176
Points
103
For the first point, you are not wrong, but when some greater threat appears, such as a disease like smallpox or COVID-19, humanity tends to unite under a single cause
?? You either live in a parallel universe, or you are an incorrigible optimist.
 
Top