Eat 100 Masterpiece burgers or pay 100 years of servitude

Ellieporter

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The burgers are made from the finest ingredients and crafted by chefs with 60 years of experience in cooking and is 5 lbs each.

The other choice is you'll be stuck in the mining pits but it has free food, lodging and you wont be paid.
 

Sola-sama

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Er.. eat.. I mean.. 100 burgers over 10 years... seems doable.
Yeah there's no time limit, I'd eat borgars in less than 100 days, but 100 years of free food and lodging is tempting. With modern housing prices, 100 years of free lodging (and food) seems like a better choice.

Aight, I'll serve in the mines. There's no clause that says I have to physically use pickaxe to mine or push minecarts, maybe I need to pilot some giant meka or some shit.
 

TheEldritchGod

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The burgers are made from the finest ingredients and crafted by chefs with 60 years of experience in cooking and is 5 lbs each.

The other choice is you'll be stuck in the mining pits but it has free food, lodging and you wont be paid.
Can I kill people in the mining pits?
What I mean is, will I be alone, or will I get to form a criminal gang?

Also, what if I happen to like eating plutonium? Do I get to choose the toppings?
Do I get to do anything else while eating the burgers?
 
D

Deleted member 84247

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Monkey power. ?????????? ?????????? ?????????? ?????????? ?????????? ?????????? ?????????? ?????????? ?????????? ?????????? all hundred
 

Ellieporter

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Can I kill people in the mining pits?
Yes you can. You can even get wild in there. As for the people that you'll get to be with... They are very pale, thin looking but can deadlift and move minecarts full of 50kg rocks... You can also form gangs but remember, there like 1000 people there including you.
Also, what if I happen to like eating plutonium? Do I get to choose the toppings?
Do I get to do anything else while eating the burgers?
You die if you eat plutonium but if you want to eat it then you can choose from a multitude of toppings like caramel, chocolate and such, you name it lol.

Aside from eating them? Well... You can get to drink a very thick milkshake that's 10 feet tall to wash it down and thick fries that are as big as your arms. Other than that, you can do anything but you cant share it...
 
D

Deleted member 84247

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Yes you can. You can even get wild in there. As for the people that you'll get to be with... They are very pale, thin looking but can deadlift and move minecarts full of 50kg rocks... You can also form gangs but remember, there like 1000 people there including you.

You die if you eat plutonium but if you want to eat it then you can choose from a multitude of toppings like caramel, chocolate and such, you name it lol.

Aside from eating them? Well... You can get to drink a very thick milkshake that's 10 feet tall to wash it down and thick fries that are as big as your arms. Other than that, you can do anything but you cant share it...
Are any of the pale people witchpires?
 
D

Deleted member 113259

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If you specified a time limit this might be a hard choice.

Instead, it's like saying, "One choice is to own the most luxurious car in the world,
the other choice is DIE"
 

Ellieporter

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If you specified a time limit this might be a hard choice.

Instead, it's like saying, "One choice is to own the most luxurious car in the world,
the other choice is DIE"
At least you'll get to eat a delicious meal tho...
there is no time limit for eating burgers, so the food it will be
Yes, there is no time limit.
 
Last edited:
D

Deleted member 54065

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The burgers are made from the finest ingredients and crafted by chefs with 60 years of experience in cooking and is 5 lbs each.

The other choice is you'll be stuck in the mining pits but it has free food, lodging and you wont be paid.
I'll take the burgers and die in bliss (due to thrombosis).

Can I have the burgers upsized to 10lbs each too?
 

RepresentingCaution

Level 37 ? ? Pronouns: she/whore ♀
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Are the burgers prepared all at the same time, or will a fresh one be presented after each one is consumed? Can I stash them in a deep freezer and reheat them as needed? Can my husband and kid help me eat them, or do I have to do all the chewing and transforming the burgers into milk for my kid?
 

TheEldritchGod

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Yes you can. You can even get wild in there. As for the people that you'll get to be with... They are very pale, thin looking but can deadlift and move minecarts full of 50kg rocks... You can also form gangs but remember, there like 1000 people there including you.
Does everyone speak english and are they also stuck in there for a 100 years? Am I allowed to direct the mining operation? For example, if there was a friend buried deep within the earth and slumbering, would I be able to redirect the diggers in that direction? Are we required to breathe? Will we live the entire 100 year sentence, no matter what?

You die if you eat plutonium but if you want to eat it then you can choose from a multitude of toppings like caramel, chocolate and such, you name it lol.
Oh. Right. Of course, I would die as I too am a human with a pressurized circulatory system and flesh. Why wouldn't I be? That would be silly, to not be human on these forums. Anyways, am I limited to human-edible only toppings? Also, anything I crap out, would I be allowed to keep my poop?
Aside from eating them? Well... You can get to drink a very thick milkshake that's 10 feet tall to wash it down and thick fries that are as big as your arms. Other than that, you can do anything but you can't share it...
So no other liquid to drink? Perhaps Water? And if water, is it typical water, or can the hydrogen in it be made up exclusively of deuterium and/or tritium? May I request other fluids to drink with my burgers? like blood, or liquid nitrogen?

Just want to know what the limits are on this hypothetical... It... is Hypothetical.... right? Are there contracts involved? Any other limits, like... no committing war crimes with the materials provided, for example?
 

Ellieporter

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Are the burgers prepared all at the same time, or will a fresh one be presented after each one is consumed? Can I stash them in a deep freezer and reheat them as needed? Can my husband and kid help me eat them, or do I have to do all the chewing and transforming the burgers into milk for my kid?
Its all prepared at the same time... Well, you cant share it but you can stash them in the freezer.
Can I have the burgers upsized to 10lbs each too?
Its a fixed size, sorry :sweating_profusely:
 
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