Sirens and Satyrs and Sex, oh my!

Joined
Feb 10, 2022
Messages
59
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18
Hi there, fellow scribblers!

I am a relatively new writer (of novels, at least; I have written poetry since I was five). If anyone gets bored or desperate, I would love to hear your thoughts on the start of my first book, Our Dark Prince. It is only ten chapters deep ATM, but I am putting up two new chapters a week. (It is actually fully written already, but I am using the incremental publishing approach to let me do fine edits gradually).

I know it is a slightly weird concept: It is a queer fantasy-romance set in a vaguely Ancient Greek world, with shifter elements, but with werewolves replaced with satyrs and sirens and gorgons and the like. Oh, and it has one gay male lead and one female lesbian lead. With erotic elements for both.

So yes, a mass-market appeal will never be this story's strong suit!

But still, I would love to know what others think -- if it is good, if it is bad, how it might be improved. For clarity, I am not scrounging for reads or fishing for compliments. I am brutal with feedback in my real life and have a thick skin.

To anyone that answers the call to action, thanks so much for your assistance. To anyone just passing by, have an awesome day and stay safe ?.

Peace and love,

Dylan
 
Joined
Feb 10, 2022
Messages
59
Points
18
Add a Smut tag. Drop Mature or Adult; you don't need both of those.

"Smut Landmines" is a shitty thing to do.
I'm relatively new, so correct me if I am wrong, but Smut is a genre tag, not a content warning. To give people an appropriate warning that your story has sexual content, you just need to click the sexual content warning, which I have already done. Or is that not how the community uses those two elements?

Personally, I have no problem with the Smut genre, and my story has its fair share of sex. But I would've thought that Smut readers are expecting naked-times on most pages, which my story doesn't have :ROFLMAO:.
 

Ai-chan

Queen of Yuri Devourer of Traps
Joined
Dec 23, 2018
Messages
1,675
Points
153
Hi there, fellow scribblers!

I am a relatively new writer (of novels, at least; I have written poetry since I was five). If anyone gets bored or desperate, I would love to hear your thoughts on the start of my first book, Our Dark Prince. It is only ten chapters deep ATM, but I am putting up two new chapters a week. (It is actually fully written already, but I am using the incremental publishing approach to let me do fine edits gradually).

I know it is a slightly weird concept: It is a queer fantasy-romance set in a vaguely Ancient Greek world, with shifter elements, but with werewolves replaced with satyrs and sirens and gorgons and the like. Oh, and it has one gay male lead and one female lesbian lead. With erotic elements for both.

So yes, a mass-market appeal will never be this story's strong suit!

But still, I would love to know what others think -- if it is good, if it is bad, how it might be improved. For clarity, I am not scrounging for reads or fishing for compliments. I am brutal with feedback in my real life and have a thick skin.

To anyone that answers the call to action, thanks so much for your assistance. To anyone just passing by, have an awesome day and stay safe ?.

Peace and love,

Dylan
Ai-chan hasn't read your story, so this is just Ai-chan's 2-cents. If the setting is Ancient Greece, then homosexuality wouldn't be anything strange. In those days, homosexuality wasn't really anything bad. It only became bad when Jesus came into the picture. The Jewish tradition of Sodom and Gomorrah had nothing to do with homosexuality, they were only punished for the way they treated foreigners. There was even this unit called Sacred Band of Thebes where gay lovers went to war together. So if your story takes that as inspiration, it's not strange at all and may even gain a lot of acceptance.

After all, not many would write about buffed gay hoplites.
 

Psycholor

Writing Trash
Joined
Nov 8, 2021
Messages
173
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103
I'm relatively new, so correct me if I am wrong, but Smut is a genre tag, not a content warning. To give people an appropriate warning that your story has sexual content, you just need to click the sexual content warning, which I have already done. Or is that not how the community uses those two elements?

Personally, I have no problem with the Smut genre, and my story has its fair share of sex. But I would've thought that Smut readers are expecting naked-times on most pages, which my story doesn't have :ROFLMAO:.
The content warning means you will have sex as something that happens. The Smut tag means that you will be describing the scenes, in detail. Smut readers (usually) do not expect sex on every page; typically there is a plot to go along with it. (That's the difference between Smut and Porn).

Look at these three stories I've linked as an example of properly tagged smut.




...Ignore the rating on the third one... @K5Rakitan is weird and enjoys being pounded by one stars. She's also a much better person to ask about the Smut genre than me.
 

RepresentingCaution

Level 37 ? ? Pronouns: she/whore ♀
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Apr 15, 2020
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Ignore the rating on the third one... @K5Rakitan is weird and enjoys being pounded by one stars. She's also a much better person to ask about the Smut genre than me.
Thanky! And yes, I love my one-star ratings! Indeed, I don't have smut on every page, but it is a big focus in the story.
 
Joined
Feb 10, 2022
Messages
59
Points
18
Ai-chan hasn't read your story, so this is just Ai-chan's 2-cents. If the setting is Ancient Greece, then homosexuality wouldn't be anything strange. In those days, homosexuality wasn't really anything bad. It only became bad when Jesus came into the picture. The Jewish tradition of Sodom and Gomorrah had nothing to do with homosexuality, they were only punished for the way they treated foreigners. There was even this unit called Sacred Band of Thebes where gay lovers went to war together. So if your story takes that as inspiration, it's not strange at all and may even gain a lot of acceptance.

After all, not many would write about buffed gay hoplites.
Thanks, Ai-chan for the feedback! The Sacred Band of Thebes was definitely an inspiration, and if I ever get around to writing sequels, that will feature a lot more prominently.

My reflection on the 'strangeness' of the story is because of the mix of everything, including the gay and lesbian MCs. I assume most bl / gl books would feature only one, not both, but I may be wrong! ?

And who doesn't love a buffed gay hoplite!
The content warning means you will have sex as something that happens. The Smut tag means that you will be describing the scenes, in detail.
Thanks for the clarification. I have appropriately smut-ified my tags. :sweat_smile:
 
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