Looking for feedback for my reincarnation age gap story

[LoliGent]

I'm now in the process of starting a new label and it's going to be nothing but age gap romances, particularly of the lolicon and shotacon variety, but will also be dabbing into older age ranges as well. If those tags seem like a put off, I assure you that the goal of these stories are to be lighthearted and wholesome. The target audience that I am aiming for are actually non-loli and non-shota. I will have more info on the new label when I make a thread explaining it, but I want to assure you that the story currently in production has nothing inappropriate happening.

This is something I've been planning for a long time and I'm finally going to get it off the ground with my first story, a reincarnation tale about a medieval couple of different classes who were executed and have been reincarnated into the modern world.

I just had a brainstorming session and wrote around 5,000 words that is a compressed version of what I presume are the first 10 chapters. It's quite long and the first part is more or less exposition. I won't request for you to read the whole thing but at least, if that doesn't interest you, skip to the dialogue and read from there. My hope is that the story is intriguing enough that, even if you skip the intro, you will be engaged with the narrative and want to go back and read the exposition. The actual story will not have such an intro. I'll sprinkle all that exposition throughout the story as it progresses. The only reason why there is an intro in this excerpt is because there's some important information about the plot that can't be sprinkled around.

Check out the story here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1mnQVakIt_uKLtvd7Glq871tkkxJ3TBaSiTchANEaZWk/edit?usp=sharing

The story proper will also have illustrations to get a better look at the characters. I have already posted 2 of them in the male/female threads by LinXueLian and Napelynn. You can get a ref for the characters right here:

ML: https://forum.scribblehub.com/threa...e-readers-perspective.5647/page-2#post-138108

FL: https://forum.scribblehub.com/threa...e-readers-perspective.5674/page-2#post-138508

There is also a third character, Wendy, but she's currently being redesigned.

I hope you can check out my story and leave me some valuable feedback. It's really important to me as I truly want to bring awareness that loli and shota does not just have to be dirty and lewd. One of my goals is to write good and compelling stories that it will inspire writers to write their own take on the subject and get a wide variety of loli and shota that are wholesome and lighthearted. I feel there is an extreme lack of stories on the subject, but I think it's more appropriate to say that I I wish authors would put their energy into making loli and shota more thought provoking and open minded rather than just have it be nothing but lewd and dirty when the subject matter is mentioned.

Thanks in advance.

 

[tounokenja]

Wendy gives off Mrs. Uro vibes. The offbeat humor of yours combined with unreliable characters foiling a level-headed main character is perfect for this type of story. I know I'll be looking forward to reading it, especially considering your credentials in writing otherwise filthy subject matter that somehow was cleaner than most of the other literature on scribblehub! ??

 

[LoliGent]

Wendy gives off Mrs. Uro vibes.

Oof. I better fix that. I intend Wendy to be the mediator between the two, the one who keeps things balanced. Can't have her going nuts.

Aside from that, thanks for your feedback. It truly helps me out. I do wish this topic would get both serious and lighthearted takes on the subject matter. But for now, since this is the inaugural story for the label, I'll have to write it in a way to ease in people who may be adverse to it, and considering my current story does just that, I'll use that same tone here and keep the filthy aspects out of it.