Should I include what is happening in the background, or leave it to the reader's imagination?

[Midnight-Phantom]

"System @origin1: Activation initiated." ?

"Scanning in progress." ?

"Anomaly detected in protected space."

"Anomalies being scanned."

"Trespasser detected."

"Entity identification in progress."

"The detected entity is an unbound soul."

"Commencing soul-related sequences."

"Soul lacks karma."

"Soul lacks divinity."

"Soul lacks corruption."

"Calculating potential threat level."

"No threat detected."

"Searching for a course of action."

"Implementing safety measures for unforeseen variables."

"Utilizing Origin authority."

"Scanning the soul's memories."

"Memory scan progress: 0%....10%....50%....80%....100%."

"Analyzing the soul's memories."

" Error encountered"

"The soul's preparatory memories indicate a mortal existence prior to entering the Origin plane."

"Further analysis in progress."

" Error encountered "

"The probability of a mortal soul surviving after death is null."

" Error encountered "

"The probability of a mortal soul surviving in the void is null."

" Error encountered "

"The probability for the entrance of any being attached to karma in any form in the Origin plane is null."

" Error encountered "

"The probability of cultivating an unbound soul as a mortal soul is null."

" Error encountered"

"The probability of any being coming into contact with the Origin ? is null."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Proceeding with protocols for these circumstances."

"Terminating annihilation protocols for the being due to its non-aggressive nature."

"Achievement deserves a reward."

"Searching for an appropriate reward based on the circumstances and achievement."

" Error encountered "

"No acceptable reward found."

"Searching for an alternative."

"Processing probabilities to determine the next course of action."

"The most suitable course of action will be taken."

"Based on the soul's memories, suitable rewards shall be created."

"Utilizing Origin authority."

"Actualizing the concept of a 'system' that shall be eternally bound to the soul as a reward for the first impossible achievement."

"As a reward for the second impossible achievement, changing the credit value in exchange for the service of the system to credits."

“As the third impossible achievement, upgrading the system inventory from holding unlimited inanimate objects to encompassing both unlimited animate and inanimate objects."

"The system's functionality has been upgraded with the 'Eternal Plane' feature."

"As a reward for the fourth impossible achievement, granting the soul three traits linked to the void itself."

"As the first soul to come into contact with the Origin ?, the soul receives the blessing of the first primordial being (Origin ? ) and shall be granted a true name as the reward for the fifth impossible achievement. The true name will be finalized after the being is given a name."

"Actualizing and proceeding with the system installation."

"System installation progress: 0%....10%....50%....80%....100%."

"Reward distribution completed."

"Utilizing Origin authority."

"Accessing the reincarnation protocol."

"System connection established."

"Sending the soul to a reincarnation cycle."

" Error encountered "

"The soul has no karma."

" Error encountered"

"The soul has reached the absolute limit of soul essence augmentation."

"Searching for a solution."

"The soul can only be sent to a creation without boundaries and restrictions."

"Searching for an appropriate creation."

"Creation found."

"Sending the soul to the reincarnation cycle of the chosen creation." ?

"Enhancing the security of the Origin realm."

"From now on, beings with similar circumstances will no longer enter the Origin realm."

"May the soul utilize these rewards for the betterment of the void."





Ps: Yeah I did spend more than 10 minutes on emojis.. so you better tell me what to do...

 

[owotrucked]

Brain: disengaged
Tendies: requested

 

[Deleted member 76176]

Kudos to people who actually read that.

Edit: I did read it, but that should answer the question.

 

[Midnight-Phantom]

Brain: disengaged
Tendies: requested

.. Oil-flavoured cookie for you

Kudos to people who actually read that.

Edit: I did read it, but that should answer the question.

.. little ol me write that masterpiece..

 

[Deleted member 54065]

"System @origin1: Activation initiated." ?

"Scanning in progress." ?

"Anomaly detected in protected space."

"Anomalies being scanned."

"Trespasser detected."

"Entity identification in progress."

"The detected entity is an unbound soul."

"Commencing soul-related sequences."

"Soul lacks karma."

"Soul lacks divinity."

"Soul lacks corruption."

"Calculating potential threat level."

"No threat detected."

"Searching for a course of action."

"Implementing safety measures for unforeseen variables."

"Utilizing Origin authority."

"Scanning the soul's memories."

"Memory scan progress: 0%....10%....50%....80%....100%."

"Analyzing the soul's memories."

" Error encountered"

"The soul's preparatory memories indicate a mortal existence prior to entering the Origin plane."

"Further analysis in progress."

" Error encountered "

"The probability of a mortal soul surviving after death is null."

" Error encountered "

"The probability of a mortal soul surviving in the void is null."

" Error encountered "

"The probability for the entrance of any being attached to karma in any form in the Origin plane is null."

" Error encountered "

"The probability of cultivating an unbound soul as a mortal soul is null."

" Error encountered"

"The probability of any being coming into contact with the Origin ? is null."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Eternal impossibility Achieved."

"Proceeding with protocols for these circumstances."

"Terminating annihilation protocols for the being due to its non-aggressive nature."

"Achievement deserves a reward."

"Searching for an appropriate reward based on the circumstances and achievement."

" Error encountered "

"No acceptable reward found."

"Searching for an alternative."

"Processing probabilities to determine the next course of action."

"The most suitable course of action will be taken."

"Based on the soul's memories, suitable rewards shall be created."

"Utilizing Origin authority."

"Actualizing the concept of a 'system' that shall be eternally bound to the soul as a reward for the first impossible achievement."

"As a reward for the second impossible achievement, changing the credit value in exchange for the service of the system to credits."

“As the third impossible achievement, upgrading the system inventory from holding unlimited inanimate objects to encompassing both unlimited animate and inanimate objects."

"The system's functionality has been upgraded with the 'Eternal Plane' feature."

"As a reward for the fourth impossible achievement, granting the soul three traits linked to the void itself."

"As the first soul to come into contact with the Origin ?, the soul receives the blessing of the first primordial being (Origin ? ) and shall be granted a true name as the reward for the fifth impossible achievement. The true name will be finalized after the being is given a name."

"Actualizing and proceeding with the system installation."

"System installation progress: 0%....10%....50%....80%....100%."

"Reward distribution completed."

"Utilizing Origin authority."

"Accessing the reincarnation protocol."

"System connection established."

"Sending the soul to a reincarnation cycle."

" Error encountered "

"The soul has no karma."

" Error encountered"

"The soul has reached the absolute limit of soul essence augmentation."

"Searching for a solution."

"The soul can only be sent to a creation without boundaries and restrictions."

"Searching for an appropriate creation."

"Creation found."

"Sending the soul to the reincarnation cycle of the chosen creation." ?

"Enhancing the security of the Origin realm."

"From now on, beings with similar circumstances will no longer enter the Origin realm."

"May the soul utilize these rewards for the betterment of the void."





Ps: Yeah I did spend more than 10 minutes on emojis.. so you better tell me what to do...

If I may be honest, I don't know what's going on here. At least, from a reader's perspective, that is.

 

[Midnight-Phantom]

If I may be honest, I don't know what's going on here. At least, from a reader's perspective, that is.

just wanna have fun as I was writing .. the systems mood is deprecated as emojis

kinda got out of hand while probably describing system prompts too... I really should do the background scenarios as things progress following prompts .. tho I really don't wanna shorten prompts kinda like how detailed it turned out...

any ideas?

 

[owotrucked]

Deprecated or described?

 

[Midnight-Phantom]

Deprecated or described?

The system is fed up after waking up and doing too much stuff ..

edit: oh .. .. fixed it ..

 

[Deleted member 54065]

just wanna have fun as I was writing .. the systems mood is deprecated as emojis

kinda got out of hand while probably describing system prompts too... I really should do the background scenarios as things progress following prompts .. tho I really don't wanna shorten prompts kinda like how detailed it turned out...

any ideas?

Try to have some paragraphs describing what's going on, so the reader won't get confused with the narration. Relying on too much dialogue can get them lost in the manuscript/chapter.

 

[Corty]

01001001 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 01101111 01101011 00100000 01101101 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101111 01101111 00100000 01101100 01101111 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100011 01101111 01101101 01100101 00100000 01110101 01110000 00100000 01110111 01101001 01110100 01101000 00100000 01100001 01101110 00100000 01100001 01101110 01110011 01110111 01100101 01110010 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01110000 01101111 01110011 01110100 00101110 00100000 01010011 01101111 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100111 01100001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01110101 01110000 00101110

 

[Midnight-Phantom]

Try to have some paragraphs describing what's going on, so the reader won't get confused with the narration. Relying on too much dialogue can get them lost in the manuscript/chapter.

umm .. I'll do as you pointed out .. don't know how all will be turned out tho ... a lot of things need to be scribed down ..let me share some cookies with you ..







@Corty !! came back to us !! you are accessing Matrix in daylight !!

<Rule: Iniciete space-time continuum lockdown>

<Rule: Access Matrix logs>

<Rule: Force breach sequence>

<command// bring_soul_back_to_vessel>

<command// re_fresh database: corty.dill>

<command// search error script>

<command// encrypt error script>

<command// re_start soul - vessel synchronization/ main-log: corty.dill>

Hope this works ...

 

[Corty]

 

[Midnight-Phantom]

 

[Aaqil]

" Error encountered"

"The probability of any being coming into contact with the Origin ? is null."

That's a weird thing to decide is impossible,

 

[Corty]

 

[Midnight-Phantom]

That's a weird thing to decide is impossible,

The tree is in a secured space inside origin realm which also shouldn't be accessible for any being as my reasoning was, any being connected with karma cant enter the origin realm altogether ..

 

[Aaqil]

The tree is in a secured space inside origin realm which also shouldn't be accessible for any being as my reasoning was, any being connected with karma cant enter the origin realm altogether ..

Then why ain't the one deciding this a being,

 

[Midnight-Phantom]

Hay should I make the whole thing as a command prompt thing ??

?

Then why ain't the one deciding this a being,

I may be a god !! But I need some time to think .. you know .. who should I make the being? the system is connected to the tree tho I was kinda thinking of giving the tree an ego but then thought can I just let the ego sleep, I thought trees don't like waking up and do nothing .. sleeping is better .. so a tree of such calibre created the construct that does all the stuff while it sleeps you know kinda like security systems in your house .. and the system is kinda slacking as no ones goes there so it was running on standby mode or something .. I don't know .. I did not think more about that ..

share some ideas for me to work with Mr cosmic cookie dealer ...

 

[Deleted member 76176]

little ol me write that masterpiece..

To give legitimate advice, cut it down to the bare essentials and include only the most important bits. I don’t recommend testing the reader’s attention span by making what I'm assuming to be the beginning chapter so confusing or feeling like a massive log dump. Instead, you want to grab their attention and want it to be immersive.

For that, you may also add narration to the part, or maybe run this system log in parallel to some important event happening in the world.

 

[Midnight-Phantom]

To give legitimate advice, cut it down to the bare essentials and include only the most important bits. I don’t recommend testing the reader’s attention span by making what I'm assuming to be the beginning chapter so confusing or feeling like a massive log dump. Instead, you want to grab their attention and want it to be immersive.

For that, you may also add narration to the part, or maybe run this system log in parallel to some important event happening in the world.

I am trying .. but kinda not working at all .. can't really think of anything right now...

so to make sense draft goes like this - MC stumbled upon the space tree was. (After describing things for a while), he finally touched the tree and lost consciousness. The system then activated. I really can't think of what to do with an unconscious soul floating in front of a colossal tree. When the system is spitting logs after logs ..