Review Swap for a Near Future Science Fantasy (Ongoing 17k words)

[DecolonialBlack]

Hey y'all! I'm getting back into posting chapters of my near future setting science fantasy, By Any Magical Means Necessary. It's a novel about an archivist who gets caught up in a rebellion against the government after the use of a magic-like weapon during a terrorist attack.

I'm happy to read 20K words of someone else's novel in exchange a review of mines. There's 6 chapters and a reading guide for the 1st one. I'd love some feedback on it from especially those interested in near future scifi, magic-tech type stories, stories with neurodivergent main characters, and those interested in stories centering BIPOC folks.

I have time to read through and review 3 stories within the next 2 weeks just to give a timeframe. Thanks everyone!

 

[MesaMesa17]

Hi! I'd be down to read your novel. My own story has about 13k words (15k in a few hours), and is based around people with superpowers in a futuristic fantasy school

However I'm not too familiar with heavy socio-political exposition, so my feedback might be a bit more focused on the other aspects of the your story, if you don't mind

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my story

 

[DecolonialBlack]

Hi! I'd be down to read your novel. My own story has about 13k words (15k in a few hours), and is based around people with superpowers in a futuristic fantasy school

However I'm not too familiar with heavy socio-political exposition, so my feedback might be a bit more focused on the other aspects of the your story, if you don't mind

---

my story

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Thanks so much for agreeing to read and happy to return the favor! And no worries about that, I'd love some feedback from someone who's not already into that subgenre of political scifi/fantasy! I'll start reading right away \.

 

[MesaMesa17]

Thanks so much for agreeing to read and happy to return the favor! And no worries about that, I'd love some feedback from someone who's not already into that subgenre of political scifi/fantasy! I'll start reading right away \.

Aight, I just finished your novel~

Some criticism
- Pardon my ignorance, but as I said I wasn't too familiar with the themes in your novel (I live in Asia), so a lot of exposition was a bit hazy for me
- Couple of grammatical errors here and there, some a bit jarring to the immersion
- Personally feel like you have to already be interested in socio-politics and have related knowledge prior to reading this novel (if that's what your goal is), so the casual crowd may be a bit put off with the heavy themes

Some of the things I thought you did well
- gripping opening scene (I like we were thrown right in to the action)
- good depiction of discrimination/oppresion (Detailed descriptions)
- Characters are realistic (I like Terrance especially. He's mature and experienced, and will do what it takes to survive)
- Descriptive writing helps me feel more immersed with the story
- I feel like someone who's interested in the themes in your story would quite enjoy it!
- Could tell you were writing with passion