NEW WEBNOVEL( Op lead character)

[Danielbanda]

Hi everyone, just recently joined this platform- last week- and so far it has not disappointed with a lot of community engagement on my novel.

Well let's get down to business, am inviting you all to check out my novel:
Ryan Kurohane; The Abyssal Monarch

Tags- Overpowered character, multiple leads, tragic,

Synopsis-
Ryojin Kurohane was once a powerful warrior, drawing strength from the mysterious Nexus Abyss—the place where the realms of mortals, demons, spirits, and gods collide.

But betrayal came from the one he trusted most. Branded a threat, the Celestial Order cast him into the Abyss—a void so terrifying that even gods fear it.

Yet, instead of being destroyed, Ryojin adapted. He became one with the darkness, absorbing its power until he was no longer just a warrior—he was something far greater.

Now, he has returned to a world that has long forgotten him. But he is no longer the man they once knew. He is beyond gods, beyond mortals—he is judgment itself.

Link-

RYOJIN KUROHANE; THE ABYSSAL MONARCH

Ryojin Kurohane was once a powerful warrior, drawing strength from the mysterious Nexus Abyss—the place where the realms of mortals, demons, spirits, and gods collide. But betrayal came from the one he trusted most. Branded a threat, the Celestial Order cast him into the Abyss—a void so...

www.scribblehub.com

 

[StoneInky]

Your chapters feel short. I checked, and they are around 500 words each. There are some readers who don't read novels with chapters fewer than 1k words, so I suggest you combine two or three chapters into one.

And beware of repetition. It turns cool edgy into cringe. You use a lot of short sentences, (ex. Silence. Pain.) so it's even easier to feel repetitive if you repeat the same sentence or word again to achieve dramatic effect. No need to overdo the theatrics. Just delete em.

The synopsis and everything else is great, and ignoring the prose, the plot is also fine, so... :) Good luck!

 

[Danielbanda]

Your chapters feel short. I checked, and they are around 500 words each. There are some readers who don't read novels with chapters fewer than 1k words, so I suggest you combine two or three chapters into one.

And beware of repetition. It turns cool edgy into cringe. You use a lot of short sentences, (ex. Silence. Pain.) so it's even easier to feel repetitive if you repeat the same sentence or word again to achieve dramatic effect. No need to overdo the theatrics. Just delete em.

The synopsis and everything else is great, and ignoring the prose, the plot is also fine, so... :) Good luck!

Thanks for the advice mate ?