Is this concept strong enough to capture attention?

[Esden-Noir]

So I've been recently writing a new novel. It's about time travel a genre I adore yet never had the energy to make. But I was listening music then a came up with this idea. It's basically a time travel novel centered around the mc who can only travel back in time at a specific time.(which is After~Noon) not afternoon tho.

This is the starting lines of the novel.

"My love has died.
I know this because I was there the moment it happened—heart stopping, light fading, fingers going cold in mine.
I know this because I have watched it happen for one hundred and seventeen times.
And today, for the one hundred and eighteenth, I have returned... After noon."

And is the poster capturing that bittersweet feeling.

Ik the image quality is bad but it's been downscaled from 20mb to only 500kb?

 

[Lookbehindyou]

I have no clue what after noon means if not afternoon. Like after, noon a person, dies?

This starting line is interesting but tells me little about what to expect. Doomed love? Saving the love using time?

I can't rate the concept because I have no clue what it is.

Just my thoughts. Good luck. Also the art is beautiful. ?

 

[Esden-Noir]

I have no clue what after noon means if not afternoon. Like after, noon dies?

This starting line is interesting but tells me little about what to expect. Doomed love? Saving the love using time?

I can't rate the concept because I have no clue what it is.

Just my thoughts. Good luck. Also the art is beautiful. ?

Yeah I just recently thought of the idea, so it's unpolished/unfinished.

And To explain what I mean by afternoon vs afternoon.

afternoon (one word): The time of day from noon (12:00 PM) to evening, usually until around 6 PM.
Example: "We met in the afternoon."

After noon (two words): Literally any time after noon has passed. It emphasizes "after" the moment of noon, and can extend into evening or night.
Example: "I'll return after noon" → anytime past 12:00 PM.

 

[JayDirex]

So I've been recently writing a new novel. It's about time travel a genre I adore yet never had the energy to make. But I was listening music then a came up with this idea. It's basically a time travel novel centered around the mc who can only travel back in time at a specific time.(which is After~Noon) not afternoon tho.

This is the starting lines of the novel.

"My love has died.
I know this because I was there the moment it happened—heart stopping, light fading, fingers going cold in mine.
I know this because I have watched it happen for one hundred and seventeen times.
And today, for the one hundred and eighteenth, I have returned... After noon."

And is the poster capturing that bittersweet feeling.

Ik the image quality is bad but it's been downscaled from 20mb to only 500kb?

Artist should all let their creativity flow, like your song.

But don't forget, this is not a real song that a reader can play. if you want the readers attention, write a synopsis that will hook them in. To include a first chapter that gets the story going.

DO NOT.

write some slice of lifey first chapter where nothing happens as your MC does nothing in order for the reader to be absorbed with who he is and then meet his cute girlfriend. NOOOOOOOOO! Bruv, with your TENET PFP make sure you have a TENET opening. It could/should be in Media Res, with something exciting happening to the MC where he has to use his powers IMMEDIATELY.

Bro, do not equivocate. Because I can already see from this post you want to write something soft that touched you but you have blinders on to what a reader wants to read. An interesting story. And if the MC can jump through time he needs to do that within the first Half of your opening chapter. The first 500 words!

and do not write a prologue or anything pointless like that. The story is about time travel? Have that man Time Travel in the first 500 words of your story. After that, you can slow it down to the inner torment of the MC and his lost love. But not until the reader gets to see his powers.

Too Easy.

 

[Wamba2K]

So I've been recently writing a new novel. It's about time travel a genre I adore yet never had the energy to make. But I was listening music then a came up with this idea. It's basically a time travel novel centered around the mc who can only travel back in time at a specific time.(which is After~Noon) not afternoon tho.

This is the starting lines of the novel.

"My love has died.
I know this because I was there the moment it happened—heart stopping, light fading, fingers going cold in mine.
I know this because I have watched it happen for one hundred and seventeen times.
And today, for the one hundred and eighteenth, I have returned... After noon."

And is the poster capturing that bittersweet feeling.

Ik the image quality is bad but it's been downscaled from 20mb to only 500kb?

So the MC can time travel back to anytime 'after noon'? And they're using that power to prevent their love's death? It's not a unique concept, but it could probably get attention if you write it interestingly enough.

Also, why specifically after noon? Does it have to do with the song?

Spoiler: There's nothing in here because I don't know how to make a Signature

Read my book lol

 

[Esden-Noir]

Artist should all let their creativity flow, like your song.

But don't forget, this is not a real song that a reader can play. if you want the readers attention, write a synopsis that will hook them in. To include a first chapter that gets the story going.

DO NOT.

write some slice of lifey first chapter where nothing happens as your MC does nothing in order for the reader to be absorbed with who he is and then meet his cute girlfriend. NOOOOOOOOO! Bruv, with your TENET PFP make sure you have a TENET opening. It could/should be in Media Res, with something exciting happening to the MC where he has to use his powers IMMEDIATELY.

Bro, do not equivocate. Because I can already see from this post you want to write something soft that touched you but you have blinders on to what a reader wants to read. An interesting story. And if the MC can jump through time he needs to do that within the first Half of your opening chapter. The first 500 words!

and do not write a prologue or anything pointless like that. The story is about time travel? Have that man Time Travel in the first 500 words of your story. After that, you can slow it down to the inner torment of the MC and his lost love. But not until the reader gets to see his powers.

Too Easy.

Yes ik that much, I really don't do Prologues and that snippet is the start of the novel. So if it starts with my love died. Then don't you think it should continue with that instead a mundane life. I am going for a more deeper story then just a time travel blah blah. It starts with death it shall continue with emotion

So the MC can time travel back to anytime 'after noon'? And they're using that power to prevent their love's death? It's not a unique concept, but it could probably get attention if you write it interestingly enough.

Also, why specifically after noon? Does it have to do with the song?

Spoiler: There's nothing in here because I don't know how to make a Signature

Read my book lol

Choose after noon specifically because the mc's gf as I'd most likely be make it. Dies at noon. The point where life is most bustling. And his power takes him to after noon. Only minutes away from saving her, too many minutes into the future. And besides that it's golden hour so it's very intimate/atmospheric. And the world building won't be just the normal world either so it fits together perfectly.

 

[CharlesEBrown]

There was a TV series a few years ago that had a kind of similar concept (something like "The Lazarus Project" or something close to that)- a number of rare individuals are born able to sense changes in the timeline. Under very specific situations, they can travel back in time, but not to a point prior to their last jump, at least not without causing complications. The MC manages to save the world but at the cost of having his girlfriend die in a bus accident in the first episode. He keeps trying to go back and save her, but hits the limit - then finds there might be a way to bypass it, but he would have to become an outlaw and use some dangerous substances to pull it off... unfortunately that was the last episode I saw (about 2/3 of the way through the series)

 

[SouthernMaiden]

Eh, Steins Gate, but way less interesting

 

[Esden-Noir]

Eh, Steins Gate, but way less interesting

Or steins gate life action/American spin off

 

[SouthernMaiden]

Or steins gate life action/American spin off

Hey could work. Does need a little more meat on it's bones though.

Spoiler: steins gate spoilers

think of all the shit that was going on in steins gate, secret organizations, timelines, old computers, a time travel microwave, so many timelines, he figures out how to save not just his lover but all his friends.

 

[Esden-Noir]

Hey could work. Does need a little more meat on it's bones though.

Spoiler: steins gate spoilers

think of all the shit that was going on in steins gate, secret organizations, timelines, old computers, a time travel microwave, so many timelines, he figures out how to save not just his lover but all his friends.

Remember I think of writing as a hobby and professionally. So the story will be deeper(pause) in lore ways then one