HellsPerfectSpawn
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- Joined
- Feb 29, 2024
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Humor Writing the trench warfare of writing. Oh mighty one won't you assist this filthy vagrant on his quest?
Excerpt Option 1:
The crisp autumn air whipped dust across our faces as we made our way through the bazaar’s tight backstreets. My gaze darted cautiously from shadow to shadow, wary of being back in such familiar environs, before settling on my companion. “Aren’t you cold in that?” I asked, gesturing to her skimpy attire.
“Worried about your big sister?” Leera teased, clutching her bosom dramatically.
I’d long since grown accustomed to Leera’s playful antics—her stubborn insistence that I was her little sibling and her frequent claims that my ‘ethereal beauty’ necessitated her 'indispensable sisterly wisdom' to fend off my ‘hordes of admirers’ had become a familiar refrain.
Rolling my eyes, I retorted, “Worried you’ll catch a cold and pass it on, more like. And I thought we’d agreed I was older than you.” With an exasperated sigh, I tugged her cloak tighter around her shoulders as I offered my token protest.
Leera chuckled, playfully ruffling my hair. “Good one, you're getting better.”
I swatted her hand away. “Leera,” I sighed, “I appreciate you coming along, but you don’t have to do this every time.”
As usual, she had found a reason to tag along, this time claiming she needed to 'stretch her legs' after being cooped up too long with the baby.
"And let you hog all the fun? Absolutely not!" She jokingly retorted, her eyes subtly narrowing as we neared a particularly dark alley where some vagrants seemed to be loitering around. The air here reeked of cheap dyes and stale sweat.
Excerpt Option 2:
The crisp autumn air, still damp from the early morning shower, carried the rich scent of earth as we threaded through the bazaar’s winding backstreets. Scattered puddles in the dips between the worn cobblestones reflected the muted glow of the few lanterns that hung from the stalls of traders and merchants preparing for the day ahead.
My gaze darted cautiously from shadow to shadow, wary of being back in such familiar environs, before settling on my companion. “Aren’t you cold in that?” I asked, gesturing to her impractically flimsy outfit.
Leera shivered exaggeratedly, punctuating the act with a delicate cough. "Oh dear, perhaps my frail constitution can't handle such brisk gusts.” She clutched her arms around herself mid-stride, her longing glance drifting toward a nearby soup vendor from where steam was curling invitingly into the cool air. "If only there were a way to warm myself during this perilous journey. I wouldn't want my ‘little sis’ to worry about me."
I almost groaned as I had grown so accustomed to her antics by now. Reaching out I tugged her cloak tighter around her shoulders. “I’m not naming names here, but if someone had listened to me when I told them to put on something warmer, they wouldn’t be in this predicament now.”
Her hopeful pout and the tantalizing aroma of the vendor’s soup wore down my resolve, though I’d never admit it aloud.
An explosive sigh left my mouth. “Fine, fine I’ll treat you to breakfast after we’re done.”
Leera chuckled, playfully ruffling my hair. “Good, your magnanimity will be remembered through the annals of history.”
I swatted her hand away. “Leera,” I sighed, “I appreciate you coming along, but you’ve got enough on your plate without babysitting me.”
As usual, she had found a reason to tag along, this time claiming she needed to 'stretch her legs' after being cooped up too long with the baby.
"And let you hog all the fun? As if!" She teasingly retorted, her eyes subtly narrowing as we neared a particularly dark alley where some vagrants seemed to be loitering around. The air here reeked of cheap dyes and stale sweat.
PS: Any tips/insights are greatly appreciated
Excerpt Option 1:
The crisp autumn air whipped dust across our faces as we made our way through the bazaar’s tight backstreets. My gaze darted cautiously from shadow to shadow, wary of being back in such familiar environs, before settling on my companion. “Aren’t you cold in that?” I asked, gesturing to her skimpy attire.
“Worried about your big sister?” Leera teased, clutching her bosom dramatically.
I’d long since grown accustomed to Leera’s playful antics—her stubborn insistence that I was her little sibling and her frequent claims that my ‘ethereal beauty’ necessitated her 'indispensable sisterly wisdom' to fend off my ‘hordes of admirers’ had become a familiar refrain.
Rolling my eyes, I retorted, “Worried you’ll catch a cold and pass it on, more like. And I thought we’d agreed I was older than you.” With an exasperated sigh, I tugged her cloak tighter around her shoulders as I offered my token protest.
Leera chuckled, playfully ruffling my hair. “Good one, you're getting better.”
I swatted her hand away. “Leera,” I sighed, “I appreciate you coming along, but you don’t have to do this every time.”
As usual, she had found a reason to tag along, this time claiming she needed to 'stretch her legs' after being cooped up too long with the baby.
"And let you hog all the fun? Absolutely not!" She jokingly retorted, her eyes subtly narrowing as we neared a particularly dark alley where some vagrants seemed to be loitering around. The air here reeked of cheap dyes and stale sweat.
Excerpt Option 2:
The crisp autumn air, still damp from the early morning shower, carried the rich scent of earth as we threaded through the bazaar’s winding backstreets. Scattered puddles in the dips between the worn cobblestones reflected the muted glow of the few lanterns that hung from the stalls of traders and merchants preparing for the day ahead.
My gaze darted cautiously from shadow to shadow, wary of being back in such familiar environs, before settling on my companion. “Aren’t you cold in that?” I asked, gesturing to her impractically flimsy outfit.
Leera shivered exaggeratedly, punctuating the act with a delicate cough. "Oh dear, perhaps my frail constitution can't handle such brisk gusts.” She clutched her arms around herself mid-stride, her longing glance drifting toward a nearby soup vendor from where steam was curling invitingly into the cool air. "If only there were a way to warm myself during this perilous journey. I wouldn't want my ‘little sis’ to worry about me."
I almost groaned as I had grown so accustomed to her antics by now. Reaching out I tugged her cloak tighter around her shoulders. “I’m not naming names here, but if someone had listened to me when I told them to put on something warmer, they wouldn’t be in this predicament now.”
Her hopeful pout and the tantalizing aroma of the vendor’s soup wore down my resolve, though I’d never admit it aloud.
An explosive sigh left my mouth. “Fine, fine I’ll treat you to breakfast after we’re done.”
Leera chuckled, playfully ruffling my hair. “Good, your magnanimity will be remembered through the annals of history.”
I swatted her hand away. “Leera,” I sighed, “I appreciate you coming along, but you’ve got enough on your plate without babysitting me.”
As usual, she had found a reason to tag along, this time claiming she needed to 'stretch her legs' after being cooped up too long with the baby.
"And let you hog all the fun? As if!" She teasingly retorted, her eyes subtly narrowing as we neared a particularly dark alley where some vagrants seemed to be loitering around. The air here reeked of cheap dyes and stale sweat.
PS: Any tips/insights are greatly appreciated
