How to write a character in love but in a comical and embarrassing way

[EliseValkyria]

Hello everyone again

I think that every now and then I open a new thread on every topic that I don't know anything about, but the truth is that your advice has helped me a lot.

The theme this time is love.

In my novel the protagonist is already married and even has a harem which loves him very much. Due to story issues he has to leave to fight against an enemy group that can manipulate from the shadows people. To prevent the group from continuing to grow in power and allies, the girls decide to keep a close eye on other possible targets of this enemy group and prevent them from interacting. One of the girls has to protect the son of a defense minister of a powerful country.

Now, my idea is that this new guy falls in love with this girl who is already married to the main character and tries to seduce her. In order to keep him close and prevent the enemy from recruiting him, she plays along a bit, but only out of necessity.

What I need this time is for the new guy to be lame, pretty much. First, I think it will be fun and second, so as not to upset the readers, because I think that if I make him fabulous the readers might feel attacked in a certain way. I've been looking for things that could be pitiful like the guy inviting her to lunch, only to find out he doesn't have enough money, or trying to surprise her by showing strength but failing and getting hurt.

The place where they are is a tropical tourist town, beaches, sea, jungle, all those things if you think that can help.

As always, thank you all in advance

 

[RepresentingWrath]

First, I think it will be fun and second

It won't.

 

[BlackKnightX]

What I need this time is for the new guy to be lame, pretty much. First, I think it will be fun and second, so as not to upset the readers, because I think that if I make him fabulous the readers might feel attacked in a certain way. I've been looking for things that could be pitiful like the guy inviting her to lunch, only to find out he doesn't have enough money, or trying to surprise her by showing strength but failing and getting hurt.

Seems like you’ve already answered your own question.

 

[EliseValkyria]

Seems like you’ve already answered your own question.

Well, yes, more or less. What I'm looking for are more ideas for that

 

[RepresentingCaution]

Get firsthand experience.

 

[JayDirex]

Well, yes, more or less. What I'm looking for are more ideas for that

it's a bad idea. A lame character adds zero sexual tension to entice the reader. and at worst a lame character is annoying to read.

what you should write is a regular ranger who does try but as a gentleman. He should even gets to the point where her heart flutters. Then you have to put her in the moral dilemma of what she needs to do next because the dude is enticing her. But don't make his advances vulgar. Make him an actual gentleman that wants to take a walk in a garden with her..and hold hands..

 

[EliseValkyria]

it's a bad idea. A lame character adds zero sexual tension to entice the reader. and at worst a lame character is annoying to read.

what you should write is a regular ranger who does try but as a gentleman. He should even gets to the point where her heart flutters. Then you have to put her in the moral dilemma of what she needs to do next because the dude is enticing her. But don't make his advances vulgar. Make him an actual gentleman that wants to take a walk in a garden with her..and hold hands..

Well, the girl is known to know how to act quite well and how to manipulate people she doesn't consider her close friends. Still she is a good person and loves the protagonist unconditionally. Readers already know this, so I was thinking of writing the chapter from the new guy's point of view. In this way hiding the fact that inside the girl is dying of cringe.

I'm thinking something like this guy thinking all the time how this girl is his ideal person, so he has to impregnate her. So he invites her to a restaurant, but when it's time to pay he realizes he doesn't have any money and it's the girl's turn to pay instead. I've experienced horrible moments like this before, on the cashier's side .

 

[BlackKnightX]

it's a bad idea. A lame character adds zero sexual tension to entice the reader. and at worst a lame character is annoying to read.

what you should write is a regular ranger who does try but as a gentleman. He should even gets to the point where her heart flutters. Then you have to put her in the moral dilemma of what she needs to do next because the dude is enticing her. But don't make his advances vulgar. Make him an actual gentleman that wants to take a walk in a garden with her..and hold hands..

I think this goes against what the op’s looking for. It’s way too serious, but op seems to want some comedic character. Nothing wrong with that. This kind of comic relief’s character appears in lots of anime and isekai novels.

 

[JayDirex]

I think this goes against what the op’s looking for. It’s way too serious, but op seems to want some comedic character. Nothing wrong with that. This kind of comic relief’s character appears in lots of anime and isekai novels.

yeah, I see now. Still, I want him to write the lame character as a gentleman like a goofy gentleman. Don't make him pervy or vulgar. Make him think in his mind that this sweet girl would be a wonderful wife and have visions of nonsense in his head.

 

[BlackKnightX]

yeah, I see now. Still, I want him to write the lame character as a gentleman like a goofy gentleman. Don't make him pervy or vulgar. Make him think in his mind that this sweet girl would be a wonderful wife and have visions of nonsense in his head.

The image in my head still suggests it’s a fuckin drama~ lol

Oh, and the term you’ve used before: sexual tension. Nothing wrong with that, but if you build up that kind of tension with a side character, it implies NTR, which is something op seems to want to avoid here. Also, making this comedic character a pathetic loser will stroke the reader’s ego a whole lot, which is a perfect fit for this degenerates’ community.

 

[ArcadiaBlade]

Bruh, thats like watching the Depp-Heard trial and not expect it to be funny.

I think that its already painful enough for a man to seduce a married woman and not expect him to be relatable at all. The only choice would be to make him annoying but it wouldn't be funny. You can make him a gentleman and start a fire with that.

I think my idea is to make him annoying while at the same time gentlemanly enough which the annoying part should be higher since any lower and you'll just make a pitiful character which would basically start a fire if you can handle a characterization well.

 

[EliseValkyria]

Bruh, thats like watching the Depp-Heard trial and not expect it to be funny.

I think that its already painful enough for a man to seduce a married woman and not expect him to be relatable at all. The only choice would be to make him annoying but it wouldn't be funny. You can make him a gentleman and start a fire with that.

I think my idea is to make him annoying while at the same time gentlemanly enough which the annoying part should be higher since any lower and you'll just make a pitiful character which would basically start a fire if you can handle a characterization well.

Well, the new guy doesn't have to know that the girl is married. And I'm just looking for funny situations mainly. I'm not looking for tension about whether the girl is cheating or not. Well, the new guy doesn't have to know that the girl is married. And I'm just looking for funny situations mainly. I'm not looking for tension about whether the girl is cheating or not. As for being a gentleman, that's something that can work, after all he's trying to impress a girl, but I also need him to be fun preferably.

Something like the typical sidekick of the main character who wants a girlfriend but never gets one and all the girls hate him.

 

[Kalebell]

Make Usher be his inspiration and have him act like he's in a sentimental music video confessing his love for her. Then have the girl interrupt him and say what are you doing. I think that's the best way for him to be embarrassed because she would distance herself from him.

 

[TheEldritchGod]

Comical love... you want the reader to laugh at someone in love.

Think about it, because I fear this will lead to fridge horror.

 

[Erysion]

Carefully. Read romcoms for references.