How to describe/provide information

[Pet3rr]

I am really bad at describing stuff like the environment, fight scenes and other stuff I can't think of.
If I do describe something it would either be a really bad description or just really short with very little information.
Is there any way describe something better?

 

[IvyVeritas]

There are a lot of different styles. I'd recommend reading through a bunch of professionally published novels and finding the style you like best, then practice trying to replicate it.

Personally, I'm not a big fan of reading long, flowery descriptions. My eyes tend to pass over them. So when I write, I also don't tend to write long, flowery descriptions, but instead, just give enough info to set the scene. (I'd like to get to the point where I can meet somewhere in the middle, but I'm still working on that.)

 

[CL]

I know the basics: practice and read your description out loud (you can pick up problems with it better by hearing what's wrong).

 

[Farok]

My advice: When describing something, ask yourself what is the most striking thing about that thing.

For example, you want to describe a city. You may ask yourself: are poor neighborhoods very visible? Are the people well dressed? Distrustful of travelers perhaps?

That way, you stay focused on the most important points, allowing yourself not to drift off and tell irrelevant stuff that nobody cares about. Of course, some people love to write long descriptions for anything and everything (like me), whether it's important or not. But you do as you want.
That was what to describe.

Now we can tackle the vocabulary. When you describe something you can sometimes feel that it is missing something: that it is not impactful or in-depth enough. When this happens, try to change your sentences, to modify them slightly to make you use more vocabulary; rarely used synonyms that can sometimes have more meaning than a whole sentence.

It is also important to remember that a description can be too long. In combat, the goal is to feel the intensity and impact of the blows (most of the time), so some will use short but direct sentences to support actions. But if in a supposedly heated fight the author suddenly writes a three-paragraph description, the readers will not understand. It would break the rhythm of the scene.

I don't think that's all, but nothing comes to my mind at the moment so I'll end there.
I sincerely hope this has helped you.

 

[RepresentingCaution]

Personally, I'm not a big fan of reading long, flowery descriptions.

I've rejected manuscripts for this.

My advice is to stare at a reference picture and pick what stands out to you. Get the key elements and don't worry about the rest.

 

[JayDirex]

Description in Motion

The purpose of description is to set your characters in an environment that the reader can visualize. And my rule is to say typically two things about the environment to ground the reader. And you write this description as THE MC IS INTERACTING with the world: it's Description in Motion

Example 1:

In the rear of the fort stood a three-story house. After Boritz left the courtyard, he entered the structure. Stepping through the broken down hallway of the second floor, two guards unlocked the kidnapped family’s suite door.

When Boritz set foot in the dimly lit room, the Baroness grabbed her son. She appeared as if she hadn’t slept in days.

Example 2

The morning breeze energized Angel as she galloped with the group toward Aizgar City. When they entered the metropolis the Earthlings enjoyed the cobblestone streets and the Paris in the country vibe of the place.

“Is that a fountain in a square?” Angel asked, pointing at a large stone structure with water shooting up and around.

________________________________

Notice the bold words are describing the atmosphere, the look, the feel of the places AS THE CHARACTER IS INTERACTING WITH THE ENVIRONMENT.

To me, it reads bad when you write a description for something that is not involved in the action of the scene. That drives me nuts. Authors will over describe gleaming cities, with flying buttresses, and diamond doorknobs when the character is not even in the city at the time. That is AMATEUR HOUR, only write what's relevant to the scene and don't OVER DESCRIBE IT.

NO ONE CARES HOW MANY TIPS ARE ON THE MAPLE LEAVES. If it doesn't move the story leave it out. Description is merely to ground the reader in the environment of the scene. Two things described should handle.

 

[Ral]

Of course there is the show don't tell aspect (JayDirex's examples are kinda bad at this) but in essence just describe what you need. What you need depends on moment by moment basis. Why do you want to describe something? To create mood? To put attention to something? To ground the actions? To pin-down the setting? Just look at what you need and what you want to achieve and go from there.

 

[ForestDweller]

Now we can tackle the vocabulary. When you describe something you can sometimes feel that it is missing something: that it is not impactful or in-depth enough. When this happens, try to change your sentences, to modify them slightly to make you use more vocabulary; rarely used synonyms that can sometimes have more meaning than a whole sentence.

That's the hard part, isn't it?

 

[Farok]

That's the hard part, isn't it?

Yes. I find it the hardest. Because it heavily depends on your current mood; sometimes you want information-heavy fights, and sometimes you want fast-paced short-line fights. The most important thing, in my humble opinion, to overcome this difficulty is to try to stick to a certain style, and only change in special circumstances. This way, you will become better with your style and not render yourself mad with trying to decipher which style you should use at one precise moment. How much information you should give for this attack, whose POV you should take for this scene, and everything else.

Hope that helped you.