How to Be Emotionally Unavailabe.

[CadmarLegend]

Give me tips, and tell me the situations you use them for.

Being emotionally unavailable is quite an investment to your life, ofc you need to be able to control when and where you do it, but it's profitable!

Ex. If you are being held hostage. You keep your cool, aren't: angry, scared, fainted, in front of the kiddnappers, you look like you have someone to rescue you. The kiddnapers themselves will be scared. Bam. Problem solved. Just become a part of the Mafia. Slowly build up your influence, from being the hostage, to the boss of the people taking you hostage, to becoming an influential person! xD

 

[Horizon42]

It's taken me over a decade of constant work and I still fail sometimes. Usually to happiness. I can be happy when I want, but not displaying happiness when I don't want to becomes... Uncontrollable sometimes.

The best strategy I've found is to create mental icons or embodiments of your emotions and destroy those icons whenever you don't want to feel or express that emotion. You can get pretty merciless with it if you're far enough along or if you've experienced a lot of trauma already by straight-up torturing a personified embodiment of a particular emotion. I recommend starting with this method at the very beginning as you feel certain positive emotions in the moment.

Then there is dealing with negative emotions like fear, hatred, maybe lust. When you feel these, method 1 is to mentally bury them, lock them up in a vault, throw the vault into a volcano, make the planet fall into the sun, etc. This works better the more abstract you get with your imagination. Method 2 is to neutralize the emotion with a simple hug, playing a game of chess, any positive activity.

The whole thing is about putting mind over body, using your imagination to override your emotions. There are 2 ultimate goals, 1: to nullify or dampen your emotions, and 2: to replace your emotions with a different one. You'll be able to feel happy when 20 seconds ago, you were sad. You can focus on others when you were just focusing on yourself. Feel pleasure when you're in pain, etc.

Identify what you are feeling on a moment to moment basis, why you are feeling that way, decide if you want to change that, then address your emotions with whatever method you feel is necessary. I would describe the replacement of any emotion, bad or good, as being ruthless to yourself, so don't let that hold you back. Be careful not to appear like a psychopath when you go walking around with a muted expression.

 

[Deleted member 45782]

What do you mean by emotionally unavailable? Does it mean like trying to keep calm and rational as much as possible, even when in intense situations?

 

[CadmarLegend]

What do you mean by emotionally unavailable? Does it mean like trying to keep calm and rational as much as possible, even when in intense situations?

Yes. Just, being unavailabe to express emotions.

 

[Deleted member 45782]

Yes. Just, being unavailabe to express emotions.

Be apathetic then.

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Anyhow...on a more serious note...Not really sure on the question "how to" be emotionally unavailable.
Do you mean by writing that type of character out who doesn't always display their emotions on their sleeve?

But I think people who faced hardships, trauma, opposing views, etc. They sometimes keep a polite neutral face so as to not show how what they truly feel or what their opinions are. People who faced hardships maybe may find certain things not much of a big deal to them, because to them, they dealt with a lot worse so they have a shrug it off eh look.

Some people just can't display their emotions really well either and that is just that.

Now if asking like in that hostage situation, that seems more like how to keep calm and unfazed as you think ahead what you're next goals are. That to me is less about being emotionally unavailable, but more of rationally and suppressing the urge of a panic attack to push oneself into a calm, think calm mode. Ofc, there may be some adrenaline rush since if in an intense situation, it still gonna give rise to something. Unless you have been through it so many times, that you're completely numb or unnerved to it by now. That or overconfidence that things will happen the way its planned in your mind. (Per situation you mentioned).