How do you like the title and synopsis alone?

OtakuKen

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I recently adjusted the title and synopsis to hook in more readers. I've also commissioned someone for a book cover so that is also on the way. Just let me know what you think about it!

Title: Hymns of Sol: A Dark, Fantastical Story

Synopsis:
A young boy grows up in the slums knowing nothing about the world. He rises from the depth of the abyss, only to find that darkness reigns over reality.

For what purpose does he fight? For whom does he struggle? Throughout his journey, he will experience an endless amount of death, war, and love. But what awaits him at the end?
 

greyblob

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what would you recommend?
"A Dark, Fantastical Story" isn't a title, it's a description, so it should be put there. The first line in the synopsis is fine. The second is meaningless - it can be applied to almost any novel. Replace it with something that introduces the MC's personality, and possibly the sort of world he's in.
 

RepresentingCaution

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You've included questions in the synopsis, so that's good.
Personally though, pretty much the only thing I read these days is reverse harem because I'm bored by everything else.
 

Ai-chan

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He's on a journey and I wanted the book to sound like an epic of sorts

what would you recommend?
Hymn refers to a song. Epic refers to a poem. So unless your protagonist's journey will be made into a song, this title wouldn't fit and will continue drawing criticism to the point that you will eventually tire of it. Do with this information as you wish.

Ai-chan would suggest:
1. The Chronicles of Sol
2. Sol's Eternal Abyss
3. Tribulations of Sol
4. The Story of Sol Illuminating Darkness (in a similar vein to King of Dragon's Pass's god epics)

If you don't mind not putting Sol in the title:
1. His Path Into Darkness
2. Shall Luminaire Guide The Path
3. Blood & Regret Through Darkness


Here is how Ai-chan would write your synopsis:
Sol, a young boy grows up in the slums knowing nothing of the world but the smell of piss, shit and decayed corpses. He escapes from the depth of the abyss, a world with no past nor future, only to find that darkness reigns over reality, a reality he has now stepped into. A reality where he will experience endless deaths and wars, no different from his previous life in the slums, only greater, worse, much worse.

Yet despite the blood, carnage and horrifying life of killing and killing and killing, to the point that he can no longer smell anything other than blood, a single fragrance makes him pause. The fragrance that comes from an innocent girl, caught up in this neverending war. A war he had contributed greatly, so that no end would be in sight. For the first time, he stops. He questions.

He questions the purpose of his battles. He questions for whom does he struggle. He questions what he has been doing this whole time. His armour feels heavy with the blood that stains it, his sword falls to the ground from the burden of the souls it reaped. He looks up to the sky, asking a silent question to the gods high above, "What is my purpose? What is my purpose!"
 
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