Give me the worst movie/anime/show trailers and I'll try and guess the plot

[Gryphon]

This was inspired because of the trailers for She-Hulk and The Woman King being really bad. Not the worst I've seen, but they're just downright awful. I mean, The Woman King is just an awful title in itself. There's a word for a person in power who is female, and that's a fucking Queen for god sakes! And they always freaking appear on youtube and its annoying the shit out of me.

So, I'm near the point of breaking, and I want to see if anyone can give me just the most awful trailers out there, and try and see what the plot is exactly about. From the beginning, middle, and the end, I'll try and guess it all. Except for the movies I have seen cause that would be boring since I'd already know the plot.

 

[LostLibrarian]

 

[Gryphon]

This was so bad it went right back around to being absolutely hilarious. If you can give me a link to the movie. I genuinely want to watch it.

Beginning: A couple is boning in a public gas station restroom, the smell of shit and ammonia overpowering them. Suddenly, the woman spots something climbing out of the toilet bowl, and it has the unmistakable look of a condom. It jumps out and pushes the guy aside, knocking him away from the woman, and covers his life giving rod. He screams as his body has been taken over by the condom and it starts boning his girlfriend, but since it isn't technically him doing the action, he gets cucked by a condom.

Middle: Luigi Macaroni, the crazy detective, has one of the condoms under a micrscope. A bullet hole potrudes from the center from where his bullet entered and left the rubbery cretin. He notices something strange about the condom, and sees that the condom has DNA in it. Sending it off to a lab to be analyzed, he leaves as another call comes in, this one describing a situation where a massive army of condoms is trying to break in to an orgy at city hall. He grabs his gun that he nicknamed "The Spunk Buster," he leaves to stop the dastardly army.

End: Luigi Macaroni enters the lair of the dastardly evil scientist, Baby Ender. It turned out the condoms were large masses of bacteria combined with his DNA through the obvious means of boning the Alien Birth Control Pill. His wife left him when she discovered he has erectile disfunction, so by combining his DNA with the Alien Birth Control Pill, as well as his special bacteria, he can essentially cuck a lot of guys while preventing him from having children, since he never got to have the family he's always wanted. Luigi kills him by shooting his balls and kicking him into the Alien Birth Control Pill and it explodes.

The End.

 

[LostLibrarian]

This was so bad it went right back around to being absolutely hilarious. If you can give me a link to the movie. I genuinely want to watch it.

Killer Condom (original title Kondom des Grauens (English: Condom of Horror)) is a 1996 German horror comedy directed by Martin Walz. It is based on the comic books Kondom des Grauens and Bis auf die Knochen ("Down to the Bones") by Ralf König.[2]

It was distributed in the United States by Troma Entertainment, which promoted the film at the Cannes Film Festival with the help of "a six-foot-long fanged condom".[3]

Tagline: The rubber that rubs YOU out!

Sadly, it isn't available for legal streaming anywhere...

 

[Representing_Tromba]

Excel Saga

 

[Gryphon]

Excel Saga

I've known of the existence of this anime, and I've seen a few clips. I never knew the trailer for it was this bad though. Like, what was I even watch it. It's not even so bad its funny. It's just a bad clip show with a song in the background.

Beginning: A highschool girl becomes the servant of an evil warlord. She falls in love with him and tries to make advances on him, but with each attempt, he just brutaly destroys her. She also has to compete with the other girl to gain the lord's affection.

Middle: I don't fucking know. The trailer tells me nothing about the overall story. The best guess I can get is the evil guy tries to take over the world, but through antics from the main character, she accidentally ruins it.

End: She gets the guy, and together they dominate the world, but destory it cause the girl is just that incompetent.

 

[Kilolo]

 

[Representing_Tromba]

I've known of the existence of this anime, and I've seen a few clips. I never knew the trailer for it was this bad though. Like, what was I even watch it. It's not even so bad its funny. It's just a bad clip show with a song in the background.

Beginning: A highschool girl becomes the servant of an evil warlord. She falls in love with him and tries to make advances on him, but with each attempt, he just brutaly destroys her. She also has to compete with the other girl to gain the lord's affection.

Middle: I don't fucking know. The trailer tells me nothing about the overall story. The best guess I can get is the evil guy tries to take over the world, but through antics from the main character, she accidentally ruins it.

End: She gets the guy, and together they dominate the world, but destory it cause the girl is just that incompetent.

You are correct about the beginning. Though that's it. That same cycle is repeated through various skits making fun of a different genre each week. No one wins. No one gets the girl. Everyone suffers. Especially Pedro. He lost his sexy wife, had pity sex with a portal with arms, and was killed as a ghost by a ghost mafia hitman whom he accidentally cucked.

 

[minionlover]

 

[Gryphon]

Didn't they have to make another version of this movie where they removed the CGI buttholes because someone thought it was a good idea to include them in the first place.

Beginning: A girl wakes up in a nightmare and finds herself and others have turned into cats which is her biggest fear because she's allergic to cats. She's then approached by another cat that has magic powers that says she cannot wake up from the nightmare unless she performs a sacrifice. Before she leaves, he gives her a warning to not ask why everyone looks like they're about to up and die from being so uncomfortable.

Middle: After getting a decent amount of cat partners, she goes to the clocktower of the moon, and theres she meets the same cat that told her to perform a sacrifice to leave her nightmare. He tells her there is one more condition, and that she must accomplish the sacrifice before midnight, otherwise she'll never wake up and live among the nightmarish anthropomorphic cats forever.

End: She sacrifices all the cats, and the prophecy cat returns. He tells her that he tricked her and that the sacrifices just gave him more power. He kills them and everyone around him like how it should be. He then erased the movie from existence so that the people in the real world doesn't have to consume this pile of visual garbage.

Sorry, but I've already seen this and I do not want to relive that foggy hell.