[Feedback & Suggestions] Kindly requesting for stories written by Vertrex

[Vertrex]

Hello readers.

This is a thread that I made to request readers to submit any feedback they have for my stories and if there are any suggestions people want to give me on making improvements, please let me know here. I'll gladly accept any and all help and adapt accordingly.

List of stories that I am currently writing

• The Life of the Phoenix Titan
• Magician Endeavour

I hope to see you soon! ;)

 

[Hathnuz]

TLoPT: give the mc a lifetime goal so the story doesn't seem like it's going nowhere. I suggest you must add it as soon as possible. And maybe you should skip every travelling scene (or even the haggling scene) when there's nothing important happened.

Magic Endeavour: I like the premise quite a lot. However, you should've hit the timeskip when the mc fell asleep as a baby but oh, well. Personally, I'm not a fan of the parents' friends and play tag scenes because they're not adding anything to the plot. This includes the washing dishes description.

Tl;dr - Avoid redundant writing. Make the pace a bit quicker. Give the first story a strong goal.

Your grammar is good so there's that. The characters also ok.

 

[Vertrex]

Thank you very much! :D

Okay. I guess I'm being too descriptive, explaining away a lot of things and writing too much into it. Well, I thought it was towards world building, but I suppose my readers are not really interested in that.

Yeah. I'll work on that! Thank you for your feedback and suggestions! :)

 

[Vertrex]

Okay. For The Life of the Phoenix Titan, I scrapped the chapters 1 to 4 that I released here and replaced them with a compressed chapters 1 to 3 that are fast paced and focuses more on the important details to progress the story on.

I hope they are better and to the point as advised by Hathnuz