rainchip
Active member
- Joined
- Sep 2, 2025
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Hello.
I’m rainchip (or just rain). I’ve been writing on-and-off for years and recently started posting my first original work: What Comes After. It’s a zombie-apocalypse horror/drama with psychological elements and anime beats focused on a group of mentally unwell characters trying to escape the city. At the core is Ren—a reverse-isekai protagonist haunted by his past, stranded in modern (2012) Japan as an outbreak spreads. The story leans on character dynamics, trauma, and slow-burn (with a little bit of slow romance) rather than heavy action. Heavy on gore/horror in some scenes. If you're not into that I totally understand.
What I’d really like feedback on:
If the pacing of the early chapters work or does it take too long to hook? If at all? I was hoping that while 1-4 were slow the payoff would make up for it later on.
Do the horror beats land? I'm honestly at a loss here. When I write the gore and zombies and stuff I'm trying to depict it from the current POVs lens. So some characters notice more. Eventually as the cast becomes desensitized there will be a shift from the gory descriptions. I do try not do over-do it.
Are the characters voices distinct/interesting from the start? Does it read stiff? I'm doing my best to keep the dialogue anime-ish and familiar but that's a double-edged sword. I read the lines aloud to myself when I edit so that I can hopefully catch the worst of it but I'm not perfect. Anyway, I’d really appreciate any constructive criticism.
And I’m happy to return the favor for anyone who takes the time to read and give feedback on their work, too.
www.scribblehub.com
What I’d really like feedback on:
If the pacing of the early chapters work or does it take too long to hook? If at all? I was hoping that while 1-4 were slow the payoff would make up for it later on.
Do the horror beats land? I'm honestly at a loss here. When I write the gore and zombies and stuff I'm trying to depict it from the current POVs lens. So some characters notice more. Eventually as the cast becomes desensitized there will be a shift from the gory descriptions. I do try not do over-do it.
Are the characters voices distinct/interesting from the start? Does it read stiff? I'm doing my best to keep the dialogue anime-ish and familiar but that's a double-edged sword. I read the lines aloud to myself when I edit so that I can hopefully catch the worst of it but I'm not perfect. Anyway, I’d really appreciate any constructive criticism.
And I’m happy to return the favor for anyone who takes the time to read and give feedback on their work, too.
What Comes After
Ren doesn’t sleep much. Nightmares drag him back to a world he can’t forget. At Seiryo University, he passes as just another student—until the day his classmates turn violent and the city collapses into chaos. Trapped in a quarantined zone overrun by the infected, Ren is forced...