Feedback for new sci-fi fantasy [Litrpg]

Spilled_Soup

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I had a dream a while back while playing Cyberpunk 2077. It kept rattling around in my head until I decided to grab my MC and plug him into Google Docs. And that is how Spark of the Revenant was born. A blend between Mass effect and a dash Cyberpunk—my two favorite games.

Spark of the Revenant is a Litrpg about a netrunner whose AI gets copied into his new "Force" powers.

I've written 11chs and am looking for feedback. Also If anyone is interested Beta reading let me know.

 

TheEldritchGod

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It doesn't strike me as very LitRPG. It's more of a... well... just a story. I'm not seeing the game mechanics. You are basing it off games, sure, but it doesn't seem like a GAME. It doesn't seem like a literal RPG. At the very least I need a character sheet, but even then I just lump most of those in with cultivation. I expect rules abuse in my LitRPG.
 

Spilled_Soup

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Joined
Aug 21, 2020
Messages
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It doesn't strike me as very LitRPG. It's more of a... well... just a story. I'm not seeing the game mechanics. You are basing it off games, sure, but it doesn't seem like a GAME. It doesn't seem like a literal RPG. At the very least I need a character sheet, but even then I just lump most of those in with cultivation. I expect rules abuse in my LitRPG.
All of that is in there, but it's after the prologue
 
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